Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Kate I am so sorry to hear this. If she isn't willing to stick with you then she isn't a true friend. You always have us at the group to listen to you and try to help. You are in my prayers. Hugs nne To the world you might be one person, but to one person you just might be the world " " May the Lord Bless you and keep you, May the Lord Make his face shine upon you, and give you Peace...Forever " Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://breastcancerpatientssoulmatesforlife.bravehost.com/ Anxiety Depression and Breast Cancer http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/AnxietyDepressionandBreastCancer Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com The Cancer Club www.cancerclub.com > feel I screwed up, OT > > This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been > confiding in > > her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our > marriage. > She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she > has > really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't > know how > to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce > versus stay > > and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude > has > been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I > have > kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. > We used > > to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today > when I > > told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe > she > didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base > tomorrow. > I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I > feel that > I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've > been > totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been > a > one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my > therapist to > > say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her > tomorrow > > afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come > here to > share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. > I feel > > like my whole world is caving in... > I love you all, thanks for being there... > Kate ____________________________________________________________ Send your photos by email in seconds... TRY FREE IM TOOLPACK at http://www.imtoolpack.com/default.aspx?rc=if3 Works in all emails, instant messengers, blogs, forums and social networks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Thanks, nne. You are always there for me. It means the world to me. I am trying not to be down, but I feel so very discouraged.Thanks again,love,KateTo: mserslife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 6:37:57 PMSubject: RE: feel I screwed up, OT Kate I am so sorry to hear this. If she isn't willing to stick with you then she isn't a true friend. You always have us at the group to listen to you and try to help. You are in my prayers. Hugs nne To the world you might be one person, but to one person you just might be the world" "May the Lord Bless you and keep you, May the Lord Make his face shine upon you, and give you Peace...Forever" Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://breastcancerpatientssoulmatesforlife.bravehost.com/ Anxiety Depression and Breast Cancer http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/AnxietyDepressionandBreastCancer Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com The Cancer Club www.cancerclub.com > feel I screwed up, OT > > This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been > confiding in > > her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our > marriage. > She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she > has > really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't > know how > to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce > versus stay > > and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude > has > been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I > have > kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. > We used > > to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today > when I > > told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe > she > didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base > tomorrow. > I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I > feel that > I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've > been > totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been > a > one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my > therapist to > > say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her > tomorrow > > afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come > here to > share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. > I feel > > like my whole world is caving in... > I love you all, thanks for being there... > Kate __________________________________________________________ Send your photos by email in seconds... TRY FREE IM TOOLPACK at http://www.imtoolpack.com/default.aspx?rc=if3 Works in all emails, instant messengers, blogs, forums and social networks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Kate I have been where you are at. When I was diagnosed with my breast cancer ALL but one of my friends deserted me. But you know what, I found BETTER and TRUE friends. Hugs nne To the world you might be one person, but to one person you just might be the world " " May the Lord Bless you and keep you, May the Lord Make his face shine upon you, and give you Peace...Forever " Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://breastcancerpatientssoulmatesforlife.bravehost.com/ Anxiety Depression and Breast Cancer http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/AnxietyDepressionandBreastCancer Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com The Cancer Club www.cancerclub.com > feel I screwed up, OT >> >> This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been >> confiding in >> >> her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our >> marriage. >> She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that >> she >> has >> really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't >> know how >> to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce >> versus stay >> >> and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude >> has >> been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I >> have >> kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. >> We used >> >> to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but >> today >> when I >> >> told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe >> she >> didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base >> tomorrow. >> I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I >> feel that >> I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and >> I've >> been >> totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been >> a >> one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my >> therapist to >> >> say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her >> tomorrow >> >> afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come >> here to >> share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me >> helps. >> I feel >> >> like my whole world is caving in... >> I love you all, thanks for being there... >> Kate > > __________________________________________________________ > Send your photos by email in seconds... > TRY FREE IM TOOLPACK at http://www.imtoolpack.com/default.aspx?rc=if3 > Works in all emails, instant messengers, blogs, forums and social > networks. ____________________________________________________________ TRY FREE IM TOOLPACK at http://www.imtoolpack.com/default.aspx?rc=if5 Capture screenshots, upload images, edit and send them to your friends through IMs, post on Twitter®, Facebook®, MySpace™, LinkedIn® – FAST! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Basically, nne, I have one other friend. The one I feel I have lost, Lynn, has been my best friend for the last 3 or so years. My other friend really doesn't have anytime for me. She works 2 jobs, goes to school full time, is going through a divorce and has 2 kids.I guess it is time to find some more friends...just have to figure out where and when, and who!Thanks for your words. I'm glad you have better friends now.love, KateFrom: nne Svihlik To: mserslife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 6:47:41 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Kate I have been where you are at. When I was diagnosed with my breast cancer ALL but one of my friends deserted me. But you know what, I found BETTER and TRUE friends. Hugs nne To the world you might be one person, but to one person you just might be the world" "May the Lord Bless you and keep you, May the Lord Make his face shine upon you, and give you Peace...Forever" Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://breastcancerpatientssoulmatesforlife.bravehost.com/ Anxiety Depression and Breast Cancer http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/AnxietyDepressionandBreastCancer Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com The Cancer Club www.cancerclub.com > feel I screwed up, OT >> >> This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been >> confiding in >> >> her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our >> marriage. >> She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that >> she >> has >> really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't >> know how >> to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce >> versus stay >> >> and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude >> has >> been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I >> have >> kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. >> We used >> >> to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but >> today >> when I >> >> told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe >> she >> didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base >> tomorrow. >> I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I >> feel that >> I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and >> I've >> been >> totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been >> a >> one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my >> therapist to >> >> say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her >> tomorrow >> >> afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come >> here to >> share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me >> helps. >> I feel >> >> like my whole world is caving in... >> I love you all, thanks for being there... >> Kate > > __________________________________________________________ > Send your photos by email in seconds... > TRY FREE IM TOOLPACK at http://www.imtoolpack.com/default.aspx?rc=if3 > Works in all emails, instant messengers, blogs, forums and social > networks. __________________________________________________________ TRY FREE IM TOOLPACK at http://www.imtoolpack.com/default.aspx?rc=if5 Capture screenshots, upload images, edit and send them to your friends through IMs, post on Twitter®, Facebook®, MySpace™, LinkedIn® – FAST! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Hugs and prayers, Kate. And don't give up on your friend - maybe she just needs a little time and respite (what's going on in HER life?), and doesn't know how to say so... Meanwhile, we're listening... in WY Practical Blackwork Designs http://practicalblackwork.com http://practical-blackwork.blogspot.com " You get a wonderful view from the point of no return... " feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in... I love you all, thanks for being there... Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Her life is overwhelming, but I'm totally there for her. I'll try not to give up just yet, but I feel she has on me already... ;o(Thank you for listening. It means more than words can convey.love, KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 6:57:30 PMSubject: RE: feel I screwed up, OT Hugs and prayers, Kate. And don't give up on your friend - maybe she just needs a little time and respite (what's going on in HER life?), and doesn't know how to say so... Meanwhile, we're listening... in WY Practical Blackwork Designs http://practicalblackwork.com http://practical-blackwork.blogspot.com "You get a wonderful view from the point of no return..." feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in... I love you all, thanks for being there... Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Honey I am sorry you are feeling that way. You have friends here...always have, always will.   ~*~Hugs~*~ ~*~Akiba~*~ Pragmatic Visionary http://www.affiliates-natural-salt-lamps.com/pages/156.php -- feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 KateIsn't this the woman you had a problem with once before where she pulled away from you? Perhaps the problem is HER and not you. Think about it and try not to dwell on any percieved shortcomings on your part and inability to make a decision. Here's the thing.... you and Lloyd have been married for a very long time and it is hard for you to give up on it. Isn't that right? I don't think anyone should push you to do something you aren't ready to do yet. I am always here for you. You have been such a dear, sweet friend to me over the years. Please don't beat yourself up over this! I love you. SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 4:33:10 PMSubject: feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 (HUGS) Hang in there, Kate. We all have our crosses to bear and it could easily be that she has things that are weighing her down as well. The best therapy is to write everything out. Not to us, just put it on paper to get it off your heart. If you feel lousy and want to say f*ck you to the world, so be it. You'll feel better after. Sometimes friendships become strained for no reason other than one person is having a bad day. Leave things for a few days and wait for her to call you. There are always two sides to every story and if there's one thing I've learned, is that we always need to wait and see why a person acts the way they did. How many times has someone been late and 'stood you up' and while you curse at them, you later come to find that they had reason for their actions. If you're still agitated, try taking a walk or baking bread...anything that you can do to burn off your pent up energy. We're here for you!Lifeportunities: transform your home-based life into freedom. Visit the Practical Homeschooling blog!  This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there... Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Thanks, Sharon. You are very dear to me too! I don't know...I feel like I just screwed it all up. Maybe I've put her on too much of a pedestal, but she is my best friend...at least she WAS.She probably wishes she had never met me. (At least that's how I'm feeling she must be feeling.love, KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 7:42:36 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT KateIsn't this the woman you had a problem with once before where she pulled away from you? Perhaps the problem is HER and not you. Think about it and try not to dwell on any percieved shortcomings on your part and inability to make a decision. Here's the thing.... you and Lloyd have been married for a very long time and it is hard for you to give up on it. Isn't that right? I don't think anyone should push you to do something you aren't ready to do yet. I am always here for you. You have been such a dear, sweet friend to me over the years. Please don't beat yourself up over this! I love you. SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 4:33:10 PMSubject: feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Thanks for the hugs, . You're right...I have a lovely journal my daughter had given me for my birthday that I could write in. That's a good idea. I DO need to wait and see if SHE calls me, and not 'bug' her anymore.I appreciate your words. They mean a lot to me.Thank you,love, KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 8:49:29 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT (HUGS) Hang in there, Kate. We all have our crosses to bear and it could easily be that she has things that are weighing her down as well. The best therapy is to write everything out. Not to us, just put it on paper to get it off your heart. If you feel lousy and want to say f*ck you to the world, so be it. You'll feel better after. Sometimes friendships become strained for no reason other than one person is having a bad day. Leave things for a few days and wait for her to call you. There are always two sides to every story and if there's one thing I've learned, is that we always need to wait and see why a person acts the way they did. How many times has someone been late and 'stood you up' and while you curse at them, you later come to find that they had reason for their actions. If you're still agitated, try taking a walk or baking bread...anything that you can do to burn off your pent up energy. We're here for you!Lifeportunities: transform your home-based life into freedom. Visit the Practical Homeschooling blog! This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there... Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Gee thanks, Akiba. That means so much to me. I am feeling sovery down now, so that's nice to hear.love you, KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 7:03:35 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Honey I am sorry you are feeling that way. You have friends here...always have, always will.   ~*~Hugs~*~ ~*~Akiba~*~ Pragmatic Visionary http://www.affiliates-natural-salt-lamps.com/pages/156.php -- feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Honey, I'm worried about you. You take care ok? She isn't worth it, nobody is worth beating yourself up like that. Just give it time, she is still your friend, and she will miss you and want you back.   ~*~Hugs~*~ ~*~Akiba~*~ Pragmatic Visionary http://www.affiliates-natural-salt-lamps.com/pages/156.php -- feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 To be honest with you....I'm a bit worried about me too!I'm trying to hang in there.love ya sis,thanks for the words of encouragement,KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 9:36:33 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Honey, I'm worried about you. You take care ok? She isn't worth it, nobody is worth beating yourself up like that. Just give it time, she is still your friend, and she will miss you and want you back.   ~*~Hugs~*~ ~*~Akiba~*~ Pragmatic Visionary http://www.affiliates-natural-salt-lamps.com/pages/156.php -- feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2011 Report Share Posted February 7, 2011 Give it time, Kate. Perhaps everything will work out and be fine in a few days. How is her husband doing? SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 7:00:23 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Thanks, Sharon. You are very dear to me too! I don't know...I feel like I just screwed it all up. Maybe I've put her on too much of a pedestal, but she is my best friend...at least she WAS.She probably wishes she had never met me. (At least that's how I'm feeling she must be feeling.love, KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 7:42:36 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT KateIsn't this the woman you had a problem with once before where she pulled away from you? Perhaps the problem is HER and not you. Think about it and try not to dwell on any percieved shortcomings on your part and inability to make a decision. Here's the thing.... you and Lloyd have been married for a very long time and it is hard for you to give up on it. Isn't that right? I don't think anyone should push you to do something you aren't ready to do yet. I am always here for you. You have been such a dear, sweet friend to me over the years. Please don't beat yourself up over this! I love you. SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 4:33:10 PMSubject: feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 Is this the one friend you had some kind of similar issues with a while ago? I think maybeshe just needs to withdraw a bit every now and then, and that it's not really anything youdid or said, and definitely not that you screwed anything up. Just something she needs todo. Or maybe that's just a guy's view of it. I don't know...Anyway, do talk it over with your therapist today, hopefully she can help you see what's what. And I do hope you'll feel better soon!love/Reb>> This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in > > her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. > She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has > really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how > to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay > > and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has > been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have > kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used > > to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I > > told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she > didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. > I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that > I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been > totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a > one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to > > say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow > > afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to > share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel > > like my whole world is caving in...> I love you all, thanks for being there...> Kate> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 Her husband has gone from cancer, to being cancer-free, however, still needing a feeding tube after nearly 4 years. He has had carotid artery blockage so bad they needed to put a stent in. He also had a heart blockage so they also needed to put a stent in. He is about 14 or so years older than she, so I think that puts him at 75. He has fallen numerous times; I've been there on at least 3 occasions and have had to help support him til we get a chair or shower chair for him to sit on. So, on one hand, he's doing well, with the cancer, but in other ways, his health is compromised. She rarely gets out, besides shopping and picking up his meds. She also suffers from severe asthma, so she has her limitations as well.I just don't know how this is all going to play out. I really don't, and I'm scared to know. ;o(love you, Kate To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 10:35:00 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Give it time, Kate. Perhaps everything will work out and be fine in a few days. How is her husband doing? SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 7:00:23 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Thanks, Sharon. You are very dear to me too! I don't know...I feel like I just screwed it all up. Maybe I've put her on too much of a pedestal, but she is my best friend...at least she WAS.She probably wishes she had never met me. (At least that's how I'm feeling she must be feeling.love, KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 7:42:36 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT KateIsn't this the woman you had a problem with once before where she pulled away from you? Perhaps the problem is HER and not you. Think about it and try not to dwell on any percieved shortcomings on your part and inability to make a decision. Here's the thing.... you and Lloyd have been married for a very long time and it is hard for you to give up on it. Isn't that right? I don't think anyone should push you to do something you aren't ready to do yet. I am always here for you. You have been such a dear, sweet friend to me over the years. Please don't beat yourself up over this! I love you. SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 4:33:10 PMSubject: feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 Yes, this is the same friend. I guess I just need to give her time and space, but more than likely, our friendship will fall away and die.I appreciate your 'guy's' view on it.I will definitely speak about this with my therapist, Roxia. She is a good listener and has some good, solid advice. She oftentimes gives me 'homework'--ideas she comes up with that she wants me to practice. We'll see if she comes up with anything this time.Thanks for your feedback, it means a lot to me.love to you and , KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Tue, February 8, 2011 3:50:44 AMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Is this the one friend you had some kind of similar issues with a while ago? I think maybeshe just needs to withdraw a bit every now and then, and that it's not really anything youdid or said, and definitely not that you screwed anything up. Just something she needs todo. Or maybe that's just a guy's view of it. I don't know...Anyway, do talk it over with your therapist today, hopefully she can help you see what's what. And I do hope you'll feel better soon!love/Reb>> This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in > > her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. > She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has > really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how > to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay > > and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has > been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have > kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used > > to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I > > told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she > didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. > I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that > I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been > totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a > one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to > > say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow > > afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to > share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel > > like my whole world is caving in...> I love you all, thanks for being there...> Kate> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 8, 2011 Report Share Posted February 8, 2011 I think Reb may be right and she just needs a break from "life" every once in a while. I'm sure everything will work out, Kate.love to you! SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Tue, February 8, 2011 5:59:48 AMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Her husband has gone from cancer, to being cancer-free, however, still needing a feeding tube after nearly 4 years. He has had carotid artery blockage so bad they needed to put a stent in. He also had a heart blockage so they also needed to put a stent in. He is about 14 or so years older than she, so I think that puts him at 75. He has fallen numerous times; I've been there on at least 3 occasions and have had to help support him til we get a chair or shower chair for him to sit on. So, on one hand, he's doing well, with the cancer, but in other ways, his health is compromised. She rarely gets out, besides shopping and picking up his meds. She also suffers from severe asthma, so she has her limitations as well.I just don't know how this is all going to play out. I really don't, and I'm scared to know. ;o(love you, Kate To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 10:35:00 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Give it time, Kate. Perhaps everything will work out and be fine in a few days. How is her husband doing? SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 7:00:23 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT Thanks, Sharon. You are very dear to me too! I don't know...I feel like I just screwed it all up. Maybe I've put her on too much of a pedestal, but she is my best friend...at least she WAS.She probably wishes she had never met me. (At least that's how I'm feeling she must be feeling.love, KateTo: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 7:42:36 PMSubject: Re: feel I screwed up, OT KateIsn't this the woman you had a problem with once before where she pulled away from you? Perhaps the problem is HER and not you. Think about it and try not to dwell on any percieved shortcomings on your part and inability to make a decision. Here's the thing.... you and Lloyd have been married for a very long time and it is hard for you to give up on it. Isn't that right? I don't think anyone should push you to do something you aren't ready to do yet. I am always here for you. You have been such a dear, sweet friend to me over the years. Please don't beat yourself up over this! I love you. SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Mon, February 7, 2011 4:33:10 PMSubject: feel I screwed up, OT This is totally off topic...I feel I lost my best friend. I've been confiding in her for years about Lloyd and how dysfunctional he is as well as our marriage. She has been a wonderful support and very encouraging. She feels that she has really put herself out there for me emotionally, and she has. I don't know how to explain it, but I AM very mixed up about what to do, i.e. divorce versus stay and be miserable. I think she's totally had it with me, and her attitude has been --*t or get off the pot. I agree, but I'm still so totally torn. I have kids, financial strains, etc.... I think she's finally 'had it' with me. We used to talk nearly daily, and always say I love you to one another, but today when I told her I loved her, there was silence. I said it again, thinking maybe she didn't hear me, but she ignored again and said maybe we'll touch base tomorrow. I think she's lost all respect for me, and I don't know what to do. I feel that I screwed up the friendship. We've been friends for 4 years now, and I've been totally there for her, with her ill husband. So, I don't think it's been a one-sided relationship. I just feel very fragile now, and called my therapist to say I don't feel altogether safe tonight....but I'm supposed to see her tomorrow afternoon, and she said to hold on til then...I know I can always come here to share...you all don't have to respond at all, just listening to me helps. I feel like my whole world is caving in...I love you all, thanks for being there...Kate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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