Children! mine too!!

[Guest guest]

OH MY GOODNESS..I'm right behind you in the same kind of struggle. My kids are

3,3,2. I've gone very LC and only allow supervised visits (3 mo now). She of

course doesn't understand this and continually whines against it (victim). But

it's been extremely good for my stress level and health, and the kids don't seem

to even notice there is less of her around.

I always wonder if I'm making the right decisions about LC, about

supervision, about only visits once a week, dinner only once a week, etc.

However, for all those feelings of 'oh, if I had only known then what I know

now'-- I'm taking them in, and applying the info I'm learning about BPD to my

life now...so may be I will have fewer of those 'oh, if I had only known'

incidents. Only time will tell, and in the mean time it's more important to

protect my children from the poor/crazy/confusing behavior she does/will

exhibit.

I have similar experiences in the creepy department too: my mum has slipped

several times over the years about her sons, she just wants her boys, etc. I

chalk it up to her egocentric behavior and inability to see me/my fam/my kids as

any thing other than extensions of herself.

I have also started keeping a spiral bound journal with dates and names of

ppl witnesses and descriptions of events/ behaviors/ brief background leading up

to, etc. I also nanny cam video record her play dates with the kids, and also

sit down 'talks' my husband and I have discussing issues and setting boundaries.

I wish I could video tape our weekly lunch at a local restaurant. (Even the

servers know something is " off " with her. ) I expect that she'll sue someday for

gparent rights, if my state even has them. I know others would think I'm

paranoid and 'a little off' myself, however, the alternative is unthinkable.

So with a little preparation against all the horrible things I can think of,

our life will go on in an even keel, low key, _balanced_ fashion.

errr, so I hope =)