Introduction. And Brene Brown's Shame and Vulnerability videos.

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I've been lurking here for years, but never posted anything until now -

mainly because every time I thought to do so I just didn't know where to

start . I'm a 40 year old daughter of a mother with BPD (or NPD - it's

hard to tell sometimes, and I'm not even really sure there is always a

clear distinction). I could go on for years describing experiences that

mirror a lot of what I've read here. As a writer, I've integrated the

troubling effects of my upbringing into psychologically disturbing

stories which I've published in various venues, but I don't discuss my

childhood experiences much in a social context, except with my shrink

and my sister . I suppose this would be a good place to change that!

Anyway, what prompted me to post now was seeing the talks Brene Brown

did on shame and vulnerability at Ted, and wondering if anyone has

talked about them here. Search turned up nothing, so I thought I'd post.

Given what a poignant monster shame is in BPD, and how we kids of BPD

parents struggle with it as well, I found these videos enlightening and

very affecting. I feel that my upbringing at the hands of my Nada have

given me a unique struggle with shame, because (like most - er, all? -

BPDs) she can't take shame, and tended to react to it by shaming her

kids, which in turn gave us all kinds of shame issues along with the

constant fear " OMG, I am not handling shame well at all - good god, am I

like HER?!! "

So, anyway, here are those videos . They're about 20 mins each, and it

helps to take 'em in order.

2010 Shame and Vulnerability http://youtu.be/X4Qm9cGRub0

<http://youtu.be/X4Qm9cGRub0>

2012 Listening to Shame http://youtu.be/psN1DORYYV0

<http://youtu.be/psN1DORYYV0>

--Kamarupa