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Dream (may be triggering)

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I had a long, somewhat disturbing dream last night. Of course, I was doing the

" rescuing " , making sure a group of people and pets were getting somewhere

important (very Children of Men).

For those of you whose BPD parents have passed away, this may be a tough read.

Soo, back tot the dream... Lots of crazy stuff happened, but the part that I

wasn't expecting included nada. In my dream, she committed suicide and I found

out, then went through all sorts of emotions, but did not collect the body. I

avoided her even in her death. By happenstance, I met up with nada's spirit in

an alleyway(who looked like the normal her) and it was the healthy/awesome/nice

version of her without the BPD. She (nada's spirit) started the conversation

with a very normal and joyful, " Hey! There you are! What's up? " I stared at her,

bewildered, and said, " Uh, mom, you know you're dead right? " and explained that

she had killed herself. She looked over her shoulder toward the house she just

came from and said " Oh, really? I guess that was bound to happen. Crap. That's

why the house smells. " We walked toward the house together (which isn't the

house I grew up in/her house) and indeed, the smell of death was rank. I felt

detached and grossed out by the concept of nada's body laying in there, but in a

way, it was the BPD nada...not my mother. The good version of my mother (in

spirit form) stood beside me. We both shrugged, turned, and walked away from the

house. There was a " well, someone will notice the smell and call the police

eventually " unspoken decision.

I can't remember what exactly happened with her through the rest of the dream,

but she was a fully functional, smart, independent and reliable spirit-person. I

think I delegated an important task to her and continued on my journey. It was

like the awful things about her died a horrible, depressing death and the

wonderful version of her remained to bring light to the world.

I woke up feeling confused and guilty. I know this dream comes from a few

things. Talking about stuff on the boards here is one of them, for

sure...Dredging things up. I felt guilty because I felt relief in the dream. I

felt guilty because I didn't take responsibility for disposing of her body or

selling the home or anything. I felt guilty because the idea of death makes far

more sense to me than the idea of BPD estrangement.

I know it's all a dream, but there's nowhere else I can share this or make sense

of it other than here. Have any of you had similar dreams? Experiences?

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For those of us that believe in spirit ghosts (wondering spirits), I wonder out

loud if people with BPD are able to shed some of their BPD after leaving they

body, like krcanada85 describes in his dream. BPD is partly biologically based.

What a powerful dream. This may be a little off topic, but some professionals

believe that dead loved ones can sometimes be with us in our dreams for a while

before they cross over. Maybe a person with BPD might choose to stay a while in

order to take care of unfinished business, which the disorder prevented.

Again, off topic, but personally, after sampling a good amount of paranormal

research and having had a few real experiences myself, I am a believer in the

spirit as being separate from the physical body and I believe it lives on after

death. Perhaps we all will eventually get to meet our parents without their

BPD, even if we have to wait until the after life.

What is on the " other side. " I guess there is only one way to find the answer

to that question; wait our turn.

>

> I had a long, somewhat disturbing dream last night. Of course, I was doing the

" rescuing " , making sure a group of people and pets were getting somewhere

important (very Children of Men).

>

> For those of you whose BPD parents have passed away, this may be a tough read.

>

> Soo, back tot the dream... Lots of crazy stuff happened, but the part that I

wasn't expecting included nada. In my dream, she committed suicide and I found

out, then went through all sorts of emotions, but did not collect the body. I

avoided her even in her death. By happenstance, I met up with nada's spirit in

an alleyway(who looked like the normal her) and it was the healthy/awesome/nice

version of her without the BPD. She (nada's spirit) started the conversation

with a very normal and joyful, " Hey! There you are! What's up? " I stared at her,

bewildered, and said, " Uh, mom, you know you're dead right? " and explained that

she had killed herself. She looked over her shoulder toward the house she just

came from and said " Oh, really? I guess that was bound to happen. Crap. That's

why the house smells. " We walked toward the house together (which isn't the

house I grew up in/her house) and indeed, the smell of death was rank. I felt

detached and grossed out by the concept of nada's body laying in there, but in a

way, it was the BPD nada...not my mother. The good version of my mother (in

spirit form) stood beside me. We both shrugged, turned, and walked away from the

house. There was a " well, someone will notice the smell and call the police

eventually " unspoken decision.

>

> I can't remember what exactly happened with her through the rest of the dream,

but she was a fully functional, smart, independent and reliable spirit-person. I

think I delegated an important task to her and continued on my journey. It was

like the awful things about her died a horrible, depressing death and the

wonderful version of her remained to bring light to the world.

>

> I woke up feeling confused and guilty. I know this dream comes from a few

things. Talking about stuff on the boards here is one of them, for

sure...Dredging things up. I felt guilty because I felt relief in the dream. I

felt guilty because I didn't take responsibility for disposing of her body or

selling the home or anything. I felt guilty because the idea of death makes far

more sense to me than the idea of BPD estrangement.

>

> I know it's all a dream, but there's nowhere else I can share this or make

sense of it other than here. Have any of you had similar dreams? Experiences?

>

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Thanks for your thoughts.

Nada is alive in real life. I guess I should have said that part too.

That very reason makes me wonder if she has followed through with her recurring

threat (something I spend too much energy wondering about, probably). When I

have dreams like this, it makes me so uneasy because I wonder which parts have

truth to them....

It felt better to write it out, though.

> >

> > I had a long, somewhat disturbing dream last night. Of course, I was doing

the " rescuing " , making sure a group of people and pets were getting somewhere

important (very Children of Men).

> >

> > For those of you whose BPD parents have passed away, this may be a tough

read.

> >

> > Soo, back tot the dream... Lots of crazy stuff happened, but the part that I

wasn't expecting included nada. In my dream, she committed suicide and I found

out, then went through all sorts of emotions, but did not collect the body. I

avoided her even in her death. By happenstance, I met up with nada's spirit in

an alleyway(who looked like the normal her) and it was the healthy/awesome/nice

version of her without the BPD. She (nada's spirit) started the conversation

with a very normal and joyful, " Hey! There you are! What's up? " I stared at her,

bewildered, and said, " Uh, mom, you know you're dead right? " and explained that

she had killed herself. She looked over her shoulder toward the house she just

came from and said " Oh, really? I guess that was bound to happen. Crap. That's

why the house smells. " We walked toward the house together (which isn't the

house I grew up in/her house) and indeed, the smell of death was rank. I felt

detached and grossed out by the concept of nada's body laying in there, but in a

way, it was the BPD nada...not my mother. The good version of my mother (in

spirit form) stood beside me. We both shrugged, turned, and walked away from the

house. There was a " well, someone will notice the smell and call the police

eventually " unspoken decision.

> >

> > I can't remember what exactly happened with her through the rest of the

dream, but she was a fully functional, smart, independent and reliable

spirit-person. I think I delegated an important task to her and continued on my

journey. It was like the awful things about her died a horrible, depressing

death and the wonderful version of her remained to bring light to the world.

> >

> > I woke up feeling confused and guilty. I know this dream comes from a few

things. Talking about stuff on the boards here is one of them, for

sure...Dredging things up. I felt guilty because I felt relief in the dream. I

felt guilty because I didn't take responsibility for disposing of her body or

selling the home or anything. I felt guilty because the idea of death makes far

more sense to me than the idea of BPD estrangement.

> >

> > I know it's all a dream, but there's nowhere else I can share this or make

sense of it other than here. Have any of you had similar dreams? Experiences?

> >

>

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