Fw: ANOTHER CHAPTER OF THEY WALK AMONG US AND REPRODUCE!!

[Guest guest]

THEY ARE AMONG US AND THEY REPRODUCE!!

HELLO, OPERATOR Actual call center conversations! Customer: 'I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through; can you help?'Operator: 'Where did you get that number, sir?'Customer: 'It's on the door of your business.'Operator: 'Sir, those are the hours that we are open.'+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Samsung ElectronicsCaller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.'Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and & nb sp; telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?'Operator: 'I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.'---------------------------------------------------------------------- RAC Motoring ServicesCaller: 'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am traveling in Australia ?'Operator: 'Does the policy name give you a clue?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while traveling in Europe )'If I register my car in France , and then take it to England , do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Directory EnquiriesCaller: 'I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please'Operator: 'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?'Caller: 'Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off.' ------------------ ----------------------------------------------------Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.Operator: 'Woven? Are you sure?'Caller: 'Yes.. That's what it says on the label -- Woven in Scotland ...' ----------------------------------------------------------------------On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: 'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on.'---------------------------------------------------------------------- Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.'Customer: 'OK.'Tech Support: ; 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'Customer: 'No.'Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'Customer: 'No.'Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'.' ----------------------------------------------------------------------Tech Support: 'OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can you see the 'OK' button di splayed?'Customer: 'Wow! How can you see my screen from there?'----------------------------------------------------------------------Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?'----------------------------------------------------------------------This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.............. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for 'Termination without Cause.'Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.(Now I know why they record these conversations!): Operat or: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect .'Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'Operator: 'Went away?'Caller: 'They disappeared'Operator: 'Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?'Caller: 'Nothing.'Operator: 'Nothing??'Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?'Caller: & nbs p; 'How do I tell?'Operator: 'Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?'Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'Caller: 'There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type..'Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'Caller: 'What's a monitor?'Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?'Caller: 'I don't know.'Operator: 'Well, then look on the b ack of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'Opera tor: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall..Caller: 'Yes, it is.'Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one? 'Caller: 'No.'Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and & n bsp; find the other cable.'Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer..'Caller: 'I can't reach.'Operator: 'OK. Well, can you see if it is?'Caller: 'No..'Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?'Caller: 'Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark.'O perator: 'Dark?'Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.'Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'Caller: 'I can't.'Operator: 'No? Why not?'Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'Operator: 'A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in?'Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet..'Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'Caller: & nbsp; 'Really? Is it that bad?'Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?'Operator: 'Tell them you're too darned stupid to own a computer!'

[Guest guest]

WOW!!! I needed that so much...ur the best sis!!

SHALONDA

"Me + God's grace & forgiveness can overcome any & everything"

Subject: Fw: ANOTHER CHAPTER OF "THEY WALK AMONG US AND REPRODUCE!!To: mserslife Date: Tuesday, October 12, 2010, 2:28 PM

THEY ARE AMONG US AND THEY REPRODUCE!!

HELLO, OPERATOR Actual call center conversations! Customer: 'I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through; can you help?'Operator: 'Where did you get that number, sir?'Customer: 'It's on the door of your business.'Operator: 'Sir, those are the hours that

we are open.'+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Samsung ElectronicsCaller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.'Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and & nb sp; telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?'Operator: 'I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.'---------------------------------------------------------------------- RAC Motoring ServicesCaller: 'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am traveling in Australia ?'Operator: 'Does the policy name give you a clue?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Caller (enquiring about

legal requirements while traveling in Europe )'If I register my car in France , and then take it to England , do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Directory EnquiriesCaller: 'I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please'Operator: 'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?'Caller: 'Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off.' ------------------

----------------------------------------------------Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.Operator: 'Woven? Are you sure?'Caller: 'Yes.. That's what it says on the label -- Woven in Scotland ...' ----------------------------------------------------------------------On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: 'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on.'---------------------------------------------------------------------- Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.'Customer:

'OK.'Tech Support: ; 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'Customer: 'No.'Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'Customer: 'No.'Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'.' ----------------------------------------------------------------------Tech Support: 'OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can you see the 'OK' button di splayed?'Customer: 'Wow! How can you see my screen from there?'----------------------------------------------------------------------Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?'----------------------------------------------------------------------This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.............. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for 'Termination without Cause.'Actual dialogue of a former

WordPerfect Customer Support employee.(Now I know why they record these conversations!): Operat or: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect .'Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'Operator: 'Went away?'Caller: 'They disappeared'Operator: 'Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?'Caller: 'Nothing.'Operator: 'Nothing??'Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'Operator:

'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?'Caller: & nbs p; 'How do I tell?'Operator: 'Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?'Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'Caller: 'There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type..'Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'Caller: 'What's a monitor?'Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when

it's on?'Caller: 'I don't know.'Operator: 'Well, then look on the b ack of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'Opera tor: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall..Caller: 'Yes, it is.'Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?

'Caller: 'No.'Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and & n bsp; find the other cable.'Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer..'Caller: 'I can't reach.'Operator: 'OK. Well, can you see if it is?'Caller: 'No..'Operator:

'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?'Caller: 'Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark.'O perator: 'Dark?'Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.'Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'Caller: 'I can't.'Operator: 'No? Why not?'Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'Operator: 'A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it

licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in?'Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet..'Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'Caller: & nbsp; 'Really? Is it that bad?'Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?'Operator: 'Tell them you're too darned stupid to own a computer!'

[Guest guest]

love it ..it reminded me of working for 911, got a call the light was out in the frg, to them this was a big thing, could not find the beer ..omg ..i wish you peaceSubject: Fw: ANOTHER CHAPTER OF "THEY WALK AMONG US AND REPRODUCE!!To: mserslife Date: Tuesday, October 12, 2010, 6:28 PM

THEY ARE AMONG US AND THEY REPRODUCE!!

HELLO, OPERATOR Actual call center conversations! Customer: 'I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through; can you help?'Operator: 'Where did you get that number, sir?'Customer: 'It's on the door of your business.'Operator: 'Sir, those are

the hours that we are open.'+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Samsung ElectronicsCaller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.'Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and & nb sp; telephone Jack

before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?'Operator: 'I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.'---------------------------------------------------------------------- RAC Motoring ServicesCaller: 'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am traveling in Australia ?'Operator: 'Does the policy name give you a clue?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while traveling in Europe )'If I register my car in France , and then take it to England , do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?' ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Directory EnquiriesCaller: 'I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please'Operator: 'I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?'Caller: 'Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off.'

------------------ ----------------------------------------------------Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.Operator: 'Woven? Are you sure?'Caller: 'Yes.. That's what it says on the label -- Woven in Scotland ...' ----------------------------------------------------------------------On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: 'I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on.'---------------------------------------------------------------------- Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.'Customer:

'OK.'Tech Support: ; 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'Customer: 'No.'Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'Customer: 'No.'Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'.' ----------------------------------------------------------------------Tech Support: 'OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can

you see the 'OK' button di splayed?'Customer: 'Wow! How can you see my screen from there?'----------------------------------------------------------------------Caller: 'I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?'----------------------------------------------------------------------This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should

have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.............. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect

organization for 'Termination without Cause.'Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee.(Now I know why they record these conversations!): Operat or: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect .'Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'Operator: 'Went away?'Caller: 'They disappeared'Operator: 'Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?'Caller: 'Nothing.'Operator: 'Nothing??'Caller:

'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?'Caller: & nbs p; 'How do I tell?'Operator: 'Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen?'Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'Caller: 'There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type..'Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'Caller: 'What's a monitor?'Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.

Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?'Caller: 'I don't know.'Operator: 'Well, then look on the b ack of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??'Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'Opera tor: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall..Caller: 'Yes, it is.'Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that

there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one? 'Caller: 'No.'Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and & n bsp; find the other cable.'Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer..'Caller: 'I can't reach.'Operator: 'OK. Well, can you see if it is?'Caller:

'No..'Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?'Caller: 'Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark.'O perator: 'Dark?'Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.'Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'Caller: 'I can't.'Operator: 'No? Why not?'Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'Operator:

'A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in?'Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet..'Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it

up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'Caller: & nbsp; 'Really? Is it that bad?'Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?'Operator: 'Tell them you're too darned stupid to own a computer!'