Guest guest Posted February 28, 2008 Report Share Posted February 28, 2008 I think you are making the right decision. I wish I was brave enough to do it myself as my marriage sucks. I have an abusive husband also. More verbally/mentally/emotionally than physical, but it has gone there at times. I can so sympathize hun. I will send some good thoughts and prayers your way. If you need to talk, I am always willing to listen and help if I can. Hugs, Celeste Baker wrote: I have talked to my family. My mom seems to be the only one that really understands. Everyone else is like well you will work through it. Maybe he didn't mean to elbow you. or maybe this or that was an accident. I do have a good friend that I have been talking to something that is an outsider, really hasn't known the relationship but knows me from years ago. Talking and seeing what there response is amazes me. So i am getting ready to file something with the court i think. and I have a place to go, it is just the point of getting there. cbaker Re: Sex and affection/Cheryl ...still > learning to reply to post forgive me > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > This has been really helpful. This makes so much > sense in my > > life. My husband seems to have gotten very angry > with the fact that > > I have some Illnesses and do not function exactly > the way I did at > > 28. Now 36 and have Graves, and Fibro. He has done > strange mean > > things hurting me physically.. ..scolding me in the > shower turning up > > the water while showing together.... then saying it > was an accident > > he didnt' mean it. Slamming the breaks on in the > car giving me whip > > lash while I am sleeping, then laughing for 10 min > while I sit there > > in pain and angry. Elbowing me in the eye in bed, > leavnig a bruise, > > and saying it was an accident. Things like this are > scary to > > me....not sure what to think. He also got upset > because I wasn't > > giving him enough attention. Once AM he sat up and > told me that > > when I am six feet under I can sleep all I want. > This was after > > repeatedly waking me early even on the weekends, by > being noisy or > > letting the dogs bark. I was so > > > taken back by this that I was actually scared. > Should I be > > seeing a sign that says EXIT!!!! > > > > Hi, Celeste, > > > > I cannot blame you one bit for being frightened. > You have every > > right to be scared by your husband's behavior. I am > no expert, but > > it sounds like he is quite unbalanced, a good bit > sadistic, and has > > a sick sense of humor. > > > > If I were you (and I have been in an abusive > relationship! ), I would > > definitely be looking for the nearest EXIT sign. My > ex did some > > things to me that left me just stunned, thinking > " Did he really just > > do that? " Irrational, hurtful behavior like that > tends to just > > escalate and get worse, so please be careful. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-mkp{ > border:1px solid > #d8d8d8;font- family:Arial; margin:14px > 0px;padding: 0px 14px;} > #ygrp-mkp hr{ > border:1px solid #d8d8d8;} > #ygrp-mkp #hd{ > color:#628c2a; font-size: 85%;font- weight:bold; line-height: 122%;margin: 10px > 0px;} > #ygrp-mkp #ads{ > margin-bottom: 10px;} > #ygrp-mkp .ad{ > padding:0 0;} > #ygrp-mkp .ad a{ > color:#0000ff; text-decoration: none;} > --> > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc{ > font-family: Arial;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc #hd{ > margin:10px > 0px;font-weight: bold;font- size:78%; line-height: 122%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc .ad{ > margin-bottom: 10px;padding: 0 0;} > --> > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-mlmsg {font-size:13px; font-family: arial, > helvetica, clean, sans-serif;} > #ygrp-mlmsg table {font-size:inherit; font:100% ;} > #ygrp-mlmsg select, input, textarea {font:99% arial, > helvetica, clean, sans-serif;} > #ygrp-mlmsg pre, code {font:115% monospace;} > #ygrp-mlmsg * {line-height: 1.22em;} > #ygrp-text{ > font-family: Georgia; > } > #ygrp-text p{ > margin:0 0 1em 0;} > #ygrp-tpmsgs{ > font-family: Arial; > clear:both;} > #ygrp-vitnav{ > padding-top: 10px;font- family:Verdana; font-size: 77%;margin: 0;} > #ygrp-vitnav a{ > padding:0 1px;} > #ygrp-actbar{ > clear:both;margin: 25px > 0;white-space: nowrap;color: #666;text- align:right; } > #ygrp-actbar .left{ > float:left;white- space:nowrap; } > ..bld{font-weight: bold;} > #ygrp-grft{ > font-family: Verdana;font- size:77%; padding:15px 0;} > #ygrp-ft{ > font-family: verdana;font- size:77%; border-top: 1px > solid #666; > padding:5px 0; > } > #ygrp-mlmsg #logo{ > padding-bottom: 10px;} > > #ygrp-vital{ > background-color: #e0ecee;margin- bottom:20px; padding:2px > 0 === message truncated === ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile. yahoo.com/ ;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR 8HDtDypao8Wcj9tA cJ __________________________________________________________ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile.yahoo.com/;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR8HDtDypao8Wcj9tAcJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2008 Report Share Posted February 28, 2008 Celeste, It wasn't me that originally posted the answer below, but after reading your posts, I have got to say something. It doesn't matter if you have been married 8 months, 8 years or 80 years, there is absolutely NO EXCUSE FOR ABUSE (emotional, mental, psychological). My 2nd husband played all 3 on me and I was a mess - we were married 8 yrs and I went thru the same doubts and concerns (so much time invested, we have a house, yada yada yada). Well, you know what? I am a person to be valued (I didn't have any of the chronic issues I have now!) and respected. I deserve to have my feelings validated and I deserve to be loved and cared for. I do NOT deserve to have my dreams trampled on; I do NOT deserve to be laughed at because I am in such pain I cannot move or do what I so desperately want to do; I DO NOT deserve to basically be treated like a second-class citizen. So I second the motion - you need to get out. For YOU. Find a family member who believes in you and believes you and see if you can be their roomie for a while while you get back on your feet. Get some good counseling to help you get the right perspective on how YOU deserve to be treated by a man (not a jackass, which is what he sounds like). And learn to love YOU. All of you. Even with this monster. As for the monies you will likely receive, he is NOT entitled to squat. It is you who has had to fight for this. It is you who suffers daily because of this. That's all I have to say. I wish you the very best of luck, whatever you decide to do. You know we will be here for you. (((Hugs))) Darlene > > > > > > This has been really helpful. This makes so much sense in my > > life. My husband seems to have gotten very angry with the fact that > > I have some Illnesses and do not function exactly the way I did at > > 28. Now 36 and have Graves, and Fibro. He has done strange mean > > things hurting me physically.. ..scolding me in the shower turning up > > the water while showing together.... then saying it was an accident > > he didnt' mean it. Slamming the breaks on in the car giving me whip > > lash while I am sleeping, then laughing for 10 min while I sit there > > in pain and angry. Elbowing me in the eye in bed, leavnig a bruise, > > and saying it was an accident. Things like this are scary to > > me....not sure what to think. He also got upset because I wasn't > > giving him enough attention. Once AM he sat up and told me that > > when I am six feet under I can sleep all I want. This was after > > repeatedly waking me early even on the weekends, by being noisy or > > letting the dogs bark. I was so > > > taken back by this that I was actually scared. Should I be > > seeing a sign that says EXIT!!!! > > > > Hi, Celeste, > > > > I cannot blame you one bit for being frightened. You have every > > right to be scared by your husband's behavior. I am no expert, but > > it sounds like he is quite unbalanced, a good bit sadistic, and has > > a sick sense of humor. > > > > If I were you (and I have been in an abusive relationship! ), I would > > definitely be looking for the nearest EXIT sign. My ex did some > > things to me that left me just stunned, thinking " Did he really just > > do that? " Irrational, hurtful behavior like that tends to just > > escalate and get worse, so please be careful. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-mkp{ > border:1px solid #d8d8d8;font-family:Arial;margin:14px 0px;padding:0px 14px;} > #ygrp-mkp hr{ > border:1px solid #d8d8d8;} > #ygrp-mkp #hd{ > color:#628c2a;font-size:85%;font-weight:bold;line- height:122%;margin:10px 0px;} > #ygrp-mkp #ads{ > margin-bottom:10px;} > #ygrp-mkp .ad{ > padding:0 0;} > #ygrp-mkp .ad a{ > color:#0000ff;text-decoration:none;} > --> > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc{ > font-family:Arial;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc #hd{ > margin:10px 0px;font-weight:bold;font-size:78%;line-height:122%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc .ad{ > margin-bottom:10px;padding:0 0;} > --> > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-mlmsg {font-size:13px;font-family:arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif;} > #ygrp-mlmsg table {font-size:inherit;font:100%;} > #ygrp-mlmsg select, input, textarea {font:99% arial, helvetica, clean, sans-serif;} > #ygrp-mlmsg pre, code {font:115% monospace;} > #ygrp-mlmsg * {line-height:1.22em;} > #ygrp-text{ > font-family:Georgia; > } > #ygrp-text p{ > margin:0 0 1em 0;} > #ygrp-tpmsgs{ > font-family:Arial; > clear:both;} > #ygrp-vitnav{ > padding-top:10px;font-family:Verdana;font-size:77%;margin:0;} > #ygrp-vitnav a{ > padding:0 1px;} > #ygrp-actbar{ > clear:both;margin:25px 0;white-space:nowrap;color:#666;text- align:right;} > #ygrp-actbar .left{ > float:left;white-space:nowrap;} > ..bld{font-weight:bold;} > #ygrp-grft{ > font-family:Verdana;font-size:77%;padding:15px 0;} > #ygrp-ft{ > font-family:verdana;font-size:77%;border-top:1px solid #666; > padding:5px 0; > } > #ygrp-mlmsg #logo{ > padding-bottom:10px;} > > #ygrp-vital{ > background-color:#e0ecee;margin-bottom:20px;padding:2px 0 8px 8px;} > #ygrp-vital #vithd{ > font-size:77%;font-family:Verdana;font-weight:bold;color:#333;text- transform:uppercase;} > #ygrp-vital ul{ > padding:0;margin:2px 0;} > #ygrp-vital ul li{ > list-style-type:none;clear:both;border:1px solid #e0ecee; > } > #ygrp-vital ul li .ct{ > font-weight:bold;color:#ff7900;float:right;width:2em;text- align:right;padding-right:.5em;} > #ygrp-vital ul li .cat{ > font-weight:bold;} > #ygrp-vital a{ > text-decoration:none;} > > #ygrp-vital a:hover{ > text-decoration:underline;} > > #ygrp-sponsor #hd{ > color:#999;font-size:77%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ov{ > padding:6px 13px;background-color:#e0ecee;margin-bottom:20px;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ov ul{ > padding:0 0 0 8px;margin:0;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ov li{ > list-style-type:square;padding:6px 0;font-size:77%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ov li a{ > text-decoration:none;font-size:130%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #nc{ > background-color:#eee;margin-bottom:20px;padding:0 8px;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad{ > padding:8px 0;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad #hd1{ > font-family:Arial;font-weight:bold;color:#628c2a;font- size:100%;line-height:122%;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad a{ > text-decoration:none;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad a:hover{ > text-decoration:underline;} > #ygrp-sponsor .ad p{ > margin:0;} > o{font-size:0;} > ..MsoNormal{ > margin:0 0 0 0;} > #ygrp-text tt{ > font-size:120%;} > blockquote{margin:0 0 0 4px;} > ..replbq{margin:4;} > --> > > > > > > > > > ______________________________________________________________________ ______________ > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your home page. > http://www.yahoo.com/r/hs > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2008 Report Share Posted February 28, 2008 , Do you have IM with Yahoo or something where we could chat? Re: Sex and affection/Cheryl ...still > learning to reply to post forgive me > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > This has been really helpful. This makes so much > sense in my > > life. My husband seems to have gotten very angry > with the fact that > > I have some Illnesses and do not function exactly > the way I did at > > 28. Now 36 and have Graves, and Fibro. He has done > strange mean > > things hurting me physically.. ..scolding me in the > shower turning up > > the water while showing together.... then saying it > was an accident > > he didnt' mean it. Slamming the breaks on in the > car giving me whip > > lash while I am sleeping, then laughing for 10 min > while I sit there > > in pain and angry. Elbowing me in the eye in bed, > leavnig a bruise, > > and saying it was an accident. Things like this are > scary to > > me....not sure what to think. He also got upset > because I wasn't > > giving him enough attention. Once AM he sat up and > told me that > > when I am six feet under I can sleep all I want. > This was after > > repeatedly waking me early even on the weekends, by > being noisy or > > letting the dogs bark. I was so > > > taken back by this that I was actually scared. > Should I be > > seeing a sign that says EXIT!!!! > > > > Hi, Celeste, > > > > I cannot blame you one bit for being frightened. > You have every > > right to be scared by your husband's behavior. I am > no expert, but > > it sounds like he is quite unbalanced, a good bit > sadistic, and has > > a sick sense of humor. > > > > If I were you (and I have been in an abusive > relationship! ), I would > > definitely be looking for the nearest EXIT sign. My > ex did some > > things to me that left me just stunned, thinking > " Did he really just > > do that? " Irrational, hurtful behavior like that > tends to just > > escalate and get worse, so please be careful. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-mkp{ > border:1px solid > #d8d8d8;font- family:Arial; margin:14px > 0px;padding: 0px 14px;} > #ygrp-mkp hr{ > border:1px solid #d8d8d8;} > #ygrp-mkp #hd{ > color:#628c2a; font-size: 85%;font- weight:bold; line-height: 122%;margin: 10px > 0px;} > #ygrp-mkp #ads{ > margin-bottom: 10px;} > #ygrp-mkp .ad{ > padding:0 0;} > #ygrp-mkp .ad a{ > color:#0000ff; text-decoration: none;} > --> > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc{ > font-family: Arial;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc #hd{ > margin:10px > 0px;font-weight: bold;font- size:78%; line-height: 122%;} > #ygrp-sponsor #ygrp-lc .ad{ > margin-bottom: 10px;padding: 0 0;} > --> > > > > <!-- > > #ygrp-mlmsg {font-size:13px; font-family: arial, > helvetica, clean, sans-serif;} > #ygrp-mlmsg table {font-size:inherit; font:100% ;} > #ygrp-mlmsg select, input, textarea {font:99% arial, > helvetica, clean, sans-serif;} > #ygrp-mlmsg pre, code {font:115% monospace;} > #ygrp-mlmsg * {line-height: 1.22em;} > #ygrp-text{ > font-family: Georgia; > } > #ygrp-text p{ > margin:0 0 1em 0;} > #ygrp-tpmsgs{ > font-family: Arial; > clear:both;} > #ygrp-vitnav{ > padding-top: 10px;font- family:Verdana; font-size: 77%;margin: 0;} > #ygrp-vitnav a{ > padding:0 1px;} > #ygrp-actbar{ > clear:both;margin: 25px > 0;white-space: nowrap;color: #666;text- align:right; } > #ygrp-actbar .left{ > float:left;white- space:nowrap; } > ..bld{font-weight: bold;} > #ygrp-grft{ > font-family: Verdana;font- size:77%; padding:15px 0;} > #ygrp-ft{ > font-family: verdana;font- size:77%; border-top: 1px > solid #666; > padding:5px 0; > } > #ygrp-mlmsg #logo{ > padding-bottom: 10px;} > > #ygrp-vital{ > background-color: #e0ecee;margin- bottom:20px; padding:2px > 0 === message truncated === ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile. yahoo.com/ ;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR 8HDtDypao8Wcj9tA cJ ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile. yahoo.com/ ;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR 8HDtDypao8Wcj9tA cJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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