Re: Re: Family & Fibro...Teri

[Guest guest]

Teri,

I'm sorry you are going through the " family " thing. Starting on your kids...no

way! Like I said, it's their loss! It is hard from time to time, but you just

can't dwell on it. It is up to ourselves to make ourselves happy. I have bad

days thinking about it, but I get over it too and move on...you have to.

Take care,

/Mi

[Guest guest]

- I think that's where a lot of my depression stems from - my mom and

I were close whereas my father and sister did not get along with her. So of

course, I was viewed as a traitor. My father wouldn't even let me cry at

her funeral - which sticks in my head to this day. He hated her, as did my

sister and they berate me for not feeling the same. So over the years we

have had many conflicts due to that. My godmother at the time of the

funeral told me that I would have a hell of a time with those two now that

my mom is gone. She was right. I haven't done anything to them to make me

such a bad person that they would not want me in their lives except for

that. That's how strong their hate is for her. Yes, we've had our share of

disagreements about normal things like regular family members will - but it

seems to me they are happier that I am not involved or maybe even am

non-existent to them. I've been told by people that I remind them of my mom

in looks and mannerisms. Maybe that's another reason for my dad/sister to

feel the way they do.

I've had a hard time with this and am really trying to let it go, but it

creeps back in from time to time as they are my only immediate family left.

But I have my husband, who is wonderful and my beautiful 3 children (grown)

and baby granddaughter. I also now have hubby's side of the family which is

good. But I know that the dad/sister thing is a core issue for me regarding

my depression and I believe I need to work it out and learn how to deal with

it - that's why I want to go back to therapy. I had been working on it with

a therapist about 5 years back and then I lost my insurance. I really

intend to go back to therapy when my new insurance kicks in this fall.

A good thing that came out of all of this is that my godmother and I have

reconnected - we were very close when I was younger. We both are happy

about that.

I really, really try not to dwell on the dad/sister thing and there are many

days when I don't even think about it but then things pop up that send me

into that black hole of depression again. And I know it hurts my kids and I

try to help them, but it's not always easy. Actually both of my sons have

depression issues now too. So I need to learn how to deal with it so I can

also help them. We need to get some closure on this because you're right -

I have to learn to move on.

Teri (central Wisconsin)

Re: Re: Family & Fibro...Teri

Teri,

I'm sorry you are going through the " family " thing. Starting on your

kids...no way! Like I said, it's their loss! It is hard from time to time,

but you just can't dwell on it. It is up to ourselves to make ourselves

happy. I have bad days thinking about it, but I get over it too and move

on...you have to.

Take care,

/Mi