Re: On delaying kindergarten

July 7, 2006

Hi

I didn't delay my son, although in hindsight I wish I had, but he is in

private catholic school and I held him back in Kindergarten. He very

poudly tells people he " did kindergarten twice " and is off to second

grade this fall reading well above grade level. I think he is where he

belongs emotionally, and I have no regrets. I think it is harder on

the parents and I think you should be proud of yourself that you know

your son so well. I had no idea until 3/4 of the way through

Kindergarten the first time. My son is not the child with Apraxia, his

younger sister is, but I did learn (thanks to my daughter) that he has

a lot of sensory issues and he was very weak in his upper trunk due to

Celiac. Actually all I really know for sure is that he is right where

he needs to be and I know that by his freindship choices and his

overall personality. You are doing the right thing by your child and

that's what we all strive for. Take a deep breath and know that you've

done your best.

>

Kim

July 8, 2006

Our Ben is going to be starting K this year, although I wish his parents would

wait another

year, I'm not sure what we would do with him in the meantime. But the main

reasons are

this: 1) he's HUGE for his age, 95th percentile in both weight and height, over

50 lb and 50

inches and going through another growth spurt right now, and along with that has

sometimes shown aggressive behaviors towards other children, so we don't want

him to

be or be seen as a bully towering over the other children, and 2) he's

academically

advanced, has known his alphabet, numbers, colors and shapes and all since

before he

was three, and we don't want him to be bored in school. He's really good with

computers,

too.

On the other hand, I don't think he is emotionally or socially ready for

kindergarten, so we

have a real problem on our hands. We are going to see an immunological

psychiatrist on

Friday and I think one of the things we will ask her is should he start K this

year. She may,

of course, want to put him on medication or on more medication. He shows some

OCD

characteristics and has receptive speech delay as well as what seems to be

semantic-

pragmatic language disorder. His articulation cleared up after he had shingles

from his

varicella vaccine and was treated with acyclovir.

It's a real dilemma.

Peace,

Kathy E.

>

> Hi ,

> Our son will not be 5 until next year but we also decided to keep Braydon

out of

kindergarten this year because we felt he was not yet ready. We do not know if

he will be

able to get an educational assistant and because he is still limited in his

speech production

we felt he would get lost in kindergarten at the present time without support.

We also feel

that he is just not ready emotionally to deal with kindergarten right now.

Another reason

for our decision is so that he would have one full year of OT and speech in

order to gain

more communication skills as he just started OT and speech within the past 6

months. I'm

still the only one who really understands him at this point but he is doing very

well in

speech having gained many more sounds and intelligible words in the past 6

months or

so. He is just starting to communicate with more than one or two words and I'm

sure by

this time next year he will be well on his way to more meaningful and functional

speech.

We are

> thankful that he was born in February so we have the luxury of keeping him

home an

extra year.

July 9, 2006

We have put so much thought and research into this. My son's birthday is in

September. The cut off in our school district is 10/16. Just one month after

my son's birthday. Evan is several inches shorter than the other kids. He has

verbal apraxia. He actually has amazing motor control including oral, fine and

gross motor. I've heard many times here there's no " typical " apraxic child.

They are all effected in their own way. With Evan he has expressive and

receptive delays. Our SLP does not feel he has any cognitive issues and doesn't

question his intelligence. She is a little concerned he may have some auditory

processing issues. She's not sure if it's that or mapping issues tied in with

the apraxia. We're still sorting that out.

Due to the fact that he is so much smaller than kids his age, is having issues

with constipation and having a little poo still come out in his underpants, and

of course his apraxia we decided to start K at 6 and not 5.

I haven't talked to a person yet that regrets doing this. I have talked to a

couple people in the neighborhood who felt their child might not be ready but

started them anyway. They said they most definitely regretted starting them

sooner and said their son struggled. I'm not saying delaying until 6 is for

everyone but I truly believe it's for us.

Evan will be going to a private preschool that offers a " transitional K " class

for young 5s and late 4s. It's 5 half days a week. Which I also like because K

around here is full time. I feel it will ease him into that schedule. He will

stay in his private speech and hopefully still receive some " resources " from the

public school system.

It's a hard decision but I feel we made the right one.

Amy D. =)

Amy

[ ] On delaying kindergarten

This was posted on another list and I thought it was interesting,

especially given that it pertains to typically developing boys. It's

from a book called " Raising Boys " by Steve Biddulph - the original

post described him as psychologist, but the descripition on Amazon

describes him as a therapist:

pg.150 " The slower development of boys' fine motor skills, and their

cognitive skills generally, suggests they would benefit by starting

school later, and so move through school a year after girls of the

same age. (Some schools already encourge this this and find it very

beneficial.)

pg.68 " In talking to heads of infant departments (from country

schools in outback Australia to big international schools in Asia and

Europe), the same message comes through: boys should stay back a

year.'....eventuall y boys catch up with girls intellectually but, in

the way schools work now, the damage is already done. the boys feel

themselves to be failures, they miss out on key skills because they

are just not ready, and so get turned off from learning. "

As we round the corner for kindergarten at my house, I'm convinced

that delaying until 6 was the right thing. That doesn't mean that I'm

not still worried about how the fall will go and using the summer to

prepare as much as possible (with fun being a not forgotten

component).

6.4, global dyspraxia, and headed for a private catholic K

July 10, 2006

Excellent idea about the private kindergarten! Just a point to

consider -the reason to keep the child in the excellent multisensory

enriched preschool for one extra year (and especially because in

your child's case he is a summer baby -so will be one of the

youngest regardless) is because it provides that extra year of

therapy and development time prior to " real " school starting. (1st)

While the majority of apraxic children are " academically ready " for

kindergarten by five to the eye -as the year goes on, and then into

higher grades, as you'll read over and over in the archives, it's

clear they were not ready like their peers. I can let you know one

child who did well starting kindergarten at 5 - on's son

. There is a few others -but not many. The majority have

posted it was a " mistake " and that they were " sorry " I know it's

hard to learn from others -but it would save much time if everyone

just checked the archives.

Om the other hand not one complaint about " starting too late "

(no harm in down the road having a child advanced a grade)

While the rest of the class is learning -the children who still have

speech and other delays may still need to be pulled out up to five

times a week for speech and occupational therapy -missing valuable

time in the class with the rest. In some cases the child needs

this, but even worse the child isn't getting that therapy because

either the school isn't providing it, or the parents don't know the

child still needs it. As always the earlier the therapy the best

for all. Who wants to be doing oral motor therapy as a teenager?

And this topic is one that does come up with those that have older

children. It just came up to me earlier today in fact!

I'm waiting to find out if I can post the update to what is going on

with Lily's son Jacky from Hong Kong who is nonverbal. (he only

makes simple vowel sounds) I just got word from an English speaking

SLP that just saw him about his first therapy session which involved

some oral motor therapy. Lily had emailed me that it was OK -but

since she doesn't speak English and I don't speak Chinese I don't

want to post anything until I hear clearly it's OK from all.

(including the professionals working with him)

One other thing that people of apraxic children tend to overlook is

the lack of " normal kid " stuff that our children didn't have much

time to do. Once school starts it's hard if not impossible to go

back to those preschool years. Don't forget carefree moments at the

zoo or park without looking at everything as therapy...to give them

time to just be a kid without pressure. Social IQ is just as

important in my opinion. Actually there are too many diagnosed

with " behavioral problems " that are based in frustration.

And finally whether you start a child that is a genius at 5 or 6 in

kindergarten you won't " hold them back " Again if they were meant to soar

ahead of others in life they will. Even then you want to consider

how far ahead do you place a child that is academically ready but

not socially -and through friend's & based on personal experience -they

will appreciate as will those around them -the time they were able

to learn from parents/those around him or her - life alone. To play

and " just be a kid "

You can learn a lot from a child; they can learn from just being one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~archive

From: " kiddietalk " <kiddietalk@...>

Date: Mon Aug 15, 2005 2:36 pm

Subject: Re: question about kindergarten kiddietalk

Dear Archana,

Below are some archives that will help answer your question. In a

nutshell your child is entitled to continue preschool until 6 if the

IEP team deems that to be appropriate. Appropriate as you can

imagine is far too tangible a word in something as important as

decisions for what is or is not " most appropriate " for your child's

education. They may say throwing an essentially nonverbal 5 year

old child who still needs tons of therapies into kindergarten as

" most appropriate "

Fortunately, you and your husband are part of that IEP team to make

that decision and you can share outside information to support your

stand...such as private evals and opinions,

and all of the following which has helped others. I'd

also suggest showing up with a copy of The Late Talker. All the

stories from The Late Talker are from this group and printed with

permission from the families. Oh, and let them know we are working

on the next book and that we may be interviewing you!

If your public school can no longer provide appropriate preschool

placement until your child is 6, they will need to provide out of

district preschool placement. You would be amazed what they find

they can do when they are confronted with that option.

Share the study posted below about the reasons to delay kindergarten

vs. retaining. If you need help you can call me at 973 390 7541.

(Jersey line to still reach me at even though we are now in

Florida!) Hope the following helps!

From: " kiddietalk " <kiddietalk@...>

Date: Sun Dec 14, 2003 10:56 am

Subject: Re: Waiting on Kindergarten/long (even for me!) answer

Hi !

Tanner was in out of district placement at the Summit Speech School

for the hearing impaired/deaf which was a preschool placement that

went up to six years old http://www.oraldeafed.org/schools/summit/

I'm not sure what happens with in district placement from State to

State -or country to country. I can however share my experience

with this:

Tanner at five was still not able to hold a pencil correctly nor was

he good at imitating circles etc. He would work hard -he's always

been a child that wants to do what others tell him to do. Due to

motor planning and weakness problems however -he still needed OT.

His speech was much improved by five -but he spoke like a baby. Put

it this way -Becca -the child who just turned three speaks far more

and far more articulate than Tanner was at five. Tanner was

developmentally slow on speech and language development. Another

theory of mine is that our children do NOT have the diagnosis of

speech language impairment -but they appear to have that when they

developmentally go through that stage. (this is the stage where

they are doing sentences -but mix up syntax -etc.) Just like the

stuttering stage can last longer and happen much later -with apraxic

children not enough studies have gone into what is " normal " for

them. So again -don't want them to be inappropriately labeled. At

five Tanner was still in intensive therapy -and needed that extra

year of intensive therapy for speech and occupational therapy. He

was only in a half a day program -and by the time he came home on

the 15 minute bus ride -he would fall asleep on the bus. I'd have

to wake him up and then he would come in and nap more. Tanner

needed much more sleep than other five year olds.

When it was time for IEP -I was told not to have him evaluated -

there was a chance that he was doing well enough that he wouldn't

qualify for continued out of district placement until six. What

happened then was that both my town school and Summit Speech School

professionals both agreed that it was most appropriate to keep

Tanner in preschool until six. Here is my favorite part of the

story from the archives : " Funny story is that

Tanner's case manager at Tanner's five year old IEP meeting said " In

our town we like to start five year olds in Kindergarten " I

actually laughed when she said that (couldn't help it) and said " Our

town? I live in this town and was a Kindergarten classroom mom for

Dakota who I started at five year olds and he and Molly ___ were

just about the only two five year olds in the entire Kindergarten

class -so suggesting to start special needs speech impaired apraxic

children at five when all the quote unquote normal kids don't start

till six is not the best idea to say the least! "

Needless to say -our town paid for Tanner to continue in his " out of

district " placement at the Summit Speech School in New Providence NJ

till six. We withheld testing which I was advised we could do -

since he would have " tested out of the program " So in fact your

town could pay for in district or out of district preschool

placement from five to six years old if you and the child study team

agree that will be best to wait till six. Keep in mind that apraxic

children take a bit longer at times to do what comes naturally to

other children -and in time they can perhaps blend in with others

with no damage to self esteem from teasing etc. I heard that in NJ

a child doesn't legally have to begin Kindergarten till seven -not

sure but anyone could check that out for their state/area. So don't

rule out paid preschool after five years old as an option...if that

is what is appropriate for your child. "

Bottom line is both the school system and you are looking for the

best way to get your child succeeding in the mainstream with as few

services as possible and as quickly as possible.

Here are some archives to answer more. Since there are a number -

and this is just the most recent -it's long and some may be

repeating but I don't have time to clean up. So if this isn't a

concern -just delete! )

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Check with other parents in your town if this is your first child to

find out what age most other parents in your town start their

children in Kindergarten. I started my son Dakota at five years old

for Kindergarten in the Warren/Berkeley Heights/Basking Ridge area

of NJ where we used to live -and he was one of the two five year

olds in the class. Most parents in our upper middle class town

didn't start their children until six for competitive sports and

academics reasons -so starting my " suspected ADHD late talker " five

year old Dakota in Kindergarten we saw as a mistake -and one we

could never fix.

Dakota was too bright to be left back once he started -socially he

was not as mature as his classmates however -but he became friends

with his class mates regardless -so repeating is something Dakota

didn't want.

What I didn't at all like was that each day the teachers had to keep

yelling over and over " Dakota... " fill in the blank - " do this or

don't do that or sit down or be quiet or pay attention " etc.

So not starting Tanner in Kindergarten at five was not even a

thought when we lived in NJ. Why put a double whammy on the kid and

start him at five when most of his classmates will be six -and in

some cases -already reading and writing!! Funny story is that