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STOP AND SMELL THE ROSES

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I emptied a box of kleenex on this one. A sad way to learn a valuable

lesson.

a

----- Original Message -----

From: Joan <cdx7159@...>

< onelist>

Sent: Sunday, March 12, 2000 12:22 PM

Subject: [ ] STOP AND SMELL THE ROSES

> From: Joan <cdx7159@...>

>

> STOP AND SMELL THE ROSES

>

> She was six years old when I first met her on the beach near where I

> live.

> I

> drive to this beach, a distance of three or four miles, whenever the

> world

> begins to close in on me. She was building a sand castle or something

> and

> looked up, her eyes as blue as the sea.

> " Hello, " she said.

> I answered with a nod, not really in the mood to bother with a small

> child.

> " I'm building, " she said.

> " I see that. What is it? " I asked, not caring.

> " Oh, I don't know, I just like the feel of sand. "

> That sounds good, I thought, and slipped off my shoes. A sandpiper

> glided

> by

> " That's a joy, " the child said.

> " It's a what? "

> " It's a joy. My mama says sandpipers come to bring us joy. "

> The bird went gliding down the beach. " Good-bye joy, " I muttered to

> myself,

> " hello pain, " and turned to walk on. I was depressed; my life seemed

> completely out of balance.

> " What's your name? " She wouldn't give up.

> " , " I answered.

> " I'm . "

> " Mine's ... I'm six. "

> " Hi, . "

> She giggled.

> " You're funny, " she said. In spite of my gloom I laughed too and walked

> on.

> Her musical giggle followed me.

> " Come again, Mr. P, " she called. " We'll have another happy day. "

> The days and weeks that followed belong to others: a group of unruly Boy

> Scouts, PTA meetings, an ailing mother. The sun was shining one morning

> as

> I

> took my hands out of the dishwater. " I need a sandpiper, " I said to

> myself,

> gathering up my coat. The ever-changing balm of the seashore awaited me.

> The

> breeze was chilly, but I strode along, trying to recapture the serenity

> I

> needed. I had forgotten the child and was startled when she appeared.

> " Hello, Mr. P, " she said. " Do you want to play? "

> " What did you have in mind? " I asked, with a twinge of annoyance.

> " I don't know, you say. "

> " How about charades? " I asked sarcastically.

> The tinkling laughter burst forth again.

> " I don't know what that is. "

> " Then let's just walk. " Looking at her, I noticed the delicate fairness

> of

> her face.

> " Where do you live? " I asked.

> " Over there. " She pointed toward a row of summer cottages. Strange, I

> thought, in winter.

> " Where do you go to school? "

> " I don't go to school. Mommy says we're on vacation. "

> She chattered little girl talk as we strolled up the beach, but my mind

> was

> on other things. When I left for home, said it had been a happy

> day.

> Feeling surprisingly better, I smiled at her and agreed.

> Three weeks later, I rushed to my beach in a state of near panic. I was

> in

> no

> mood to even greet . I thought I saw her mother on the porch and

> felt

> like demanding she keep her child at home.

> " Look, if you don't mind, " I said crossly when caught up with me

> " I'd rather be alone today. "

> She seems unusually pale and out of breath.

> " Why? " she asked.

> I turned to her and shouted,

> " Because my mother died! " and thought, my God, why was I saying this to

> a

> little child?

> " Oh, " she said quietly, " then this is a bad day. "

> " Yes, " I said, " and yesterday and the day before and-oh, go away! "

> " Did it hurt? " she inquired.

> " Did what hurt? " I was exasperated with her, with myself.

> " When she died? "

> " Of course it hurt!!!! " I snapped, misunderstanding, wrapped up in

> myself.

> I

> strode off. A month or so after that, when I next went to the beach, she

> wasn't there. Feeling guilty, ashamed and admitting to myself I missed

> her,

> I

> went up to the cottage after my walk and knocked at the door. A drawn

> looking

> young woman with honey-colored hair opened the door.

> " Hello, " I said. " I'm . I missed your little girl today

> and

> wondered where she was. "

> " Oh yes, Mr. , please come in. spoke of you so much. I'm

> afraid

> I allowed her to bother you. If she was a nuisance, please, accept my

> apologies. "

> " Not at all-she's a delightful child, " I said, suddenly realizing that I

> meant it.

> " Where is she? "

> " died last week, Mr. . She had leukemia. Maybe she didn't

> tell

> you. "

> Struck dumb, I groped for a chair. My breath caught.

> " She loved this beach; so when she asked to come, we couldn't say no.

> She

> seemed so much better here and had a lot of what she called happy days.

> But

> the last few weeks, she declined rapidly... " her voice faltered. She

> left

> something for you ... if only I can find it. Could you wait a moment

> while

> I

> look? "

> I nodded stupidly, my mind racing for something, anything, to say to

> this

> lovely young woman. She handed me a smeared envelope, with MR. P

> printed

> in

> bold, childish letters. Inside was a drawing in bright crayon hues a

> yellow

> beach, a blue sea, and a brown bird. Underneath was carefully printed:

> A SANDPIPER TO BRING YOU JOY.

> Tears welled up in my eyes, and a heart that had almost forgotten to

> love

> opened wide. I took 's mother in my arms. " I'm so sorry, I'm sorry,

> I'm

> so sorry, " I muttered over and over, and we wept together. The precious

> little picture is framed now and hangs in my study. Six words -- one for

> each

> year of her life -- that speak to me of harmony, courage, undemanding

> love.

> A

> gift from a child with sea-blue eyes and hair the color of sand-who

> taught

> me

> the gift of love.

> NOTE: I hope you have a few Kleenex tissues left in that box. The above

> is

> a

> true story sent out by . It serves as a reminder to all

> of

> us

> that we need to take time to enjoy living and life and each other.

> " The price of hating other human beings is loving oneself less. " Life is

> so

> complicated, the hustle and bustle of everyday traumas, can make us lose

> focus about what is truly important or what is only a

> momentary setback or crisis. Today, be sure to give your loved ones an

> extra

> hug, and by all means, take a moment, even if it is only ten seconds,

> and stop and smell the roses.

>

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Thanks Joan,and yes I had to reach for the kleenex. This arrivedat a

time when the pain in my knee and hip was unbearable and I was feeling

angry and the " why me " was uppermost in my head. By the time I finished

reading this story, I felt myself smiling.

Hugs

June

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