Guest guest Posted September 21, 2008 Report Share Posted September 21, 2008 Samsung ElectronicsCaller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about."Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"Operator: "I think it means the telephone plug on the wall."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."Customer: "OK."Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"Customer: "No."Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"Customer: "No."Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."----------------------------------------------------------------------Tech Support: "OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"Customer: "Wow! How can you see my screen from there?"----------------------------------------------------------------------Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?"----------------------------------------------------------------------This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause."Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!):Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."Operator: "What sort of trouble??"Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."Operator: "Went away?"Caller: "They disappeared."Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"Caller: "Nothing."Operator: "Nothing??"Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"Caller: "How do I tell?"Operator: "Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen??"Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"Caller: "There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type."Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"Caller: "What's a monitor?"Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"Caller: "I don't know."Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"Caller: "Yes, I think so."Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.Caller: "Yes, it is."Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"Caller: "No."Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."Caller: "Okay, here it is."Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."Caller: "I can't reach."Operator: "OK. Well, can you see if it is??"Caller: "No."Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"Calle "Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark."Operator: "Dark??"Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."Caller: "I can't."Operator: "No? Why not??"Caller: "Because there's a power failure."Operator: "A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in??"Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"Operator:"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!!!" P PM (Polymositis) 12/98, UIP 8/00, o2 24/7 9 LPM 8/04, PH 3/06, ILL yo 60 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 21, 2008 Report Share Posted September 21, 2008 P. ..thanks for the late night chuckles!!!! My son and son-in-law are computer IT specialists and they will love these too. Z fibriotic NSIP/05 Z 64, fibriotic NSIP/o5/PA And “mild” PH/10/07 and Reynaud’s too!! No, NSIP was not self-inflicted…I never smoked! Potter, reader,carousel lover and MomMom to Darah and Sara “I’m gonna be iron like a lion in Zion” Bob Marley Vinca Minor-periwinkle is my flower wrote: Samsung Electronics Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?" Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about." Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?" Operator: "I think it means the telephone plug on the wall." ---------------------------------------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop." Customer: "OK." Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?" Customer: "No." Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?" Customer: "No." Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?" Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'." ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Tech Support: "OK. At the bottom left hand side of your screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?" Customer: "Wow! How can you see my screen from there?" ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?" ---------------------------------------------------------------------- This has to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the WordPerfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department.. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause." Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!): Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?" Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect." Operator: "What sort of trouble??" Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away." Operator: "Went away?" Caller: "They disappeared." Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" Caller: "Nothing." Operator: "Nothing??" Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type." Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??" Caller: "How do I tell?" Operator: "Can you see the 'C: prompt' on the screen??" Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?" Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?" Caller: "There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept anything I type." Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??" Caller: "What's a monitor?" Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??" Caller: "I don't know." Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??" Caller: "Yes, I think so." Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall. Caller: "Yes, it is." Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??" Caller: "No." Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable." Caller: "Okay, here it is." Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer." Caller: "I can't reach." Operator: "OK. Well, can you see if it is??" Caller: "No." Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??" Calle "Well, it's not because I don't have the right angle -- it's because it's dark." Operator: "Dark??" Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window." Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then." Caller: "I can't." Operator: "No? Why not??" Caller: "Because there's a power failure." Operator: "A power .... A power failure? Aha. Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff that your computer came in??" Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet." Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from." Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?" Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is." Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??" Operator:"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!!!" P PM (Polymositis) 12/98, UIP 8/00, o2 24/7 9 LPM 8/04, PH 3/06, ILL yo 60 No virus found in this incoming message. Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com Version: 8.0.169 / Virus Database: 270.7.0/1683 - Release Date: 9/21/2008 10:10 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 22, 2008 Report Share Posted September 22, 2008 Subject: THE WIFE, THE PILOT !!! My ex-wife started taking flying lessons about the time our divorce started and she got her licence shortly before our divorce was final. Yesterday afternoon I got a phone call, that she narrowly escaped injury in the aircraft she was piloting. Seems she was forced to make an emergency landing in Hamilton because of bad weather. Thank God the kids weren't with her. The FAA issued a preliminary report, citing pilot error: She was flying a single engine aircraft in IFR (instrument flight rating) conditions while only having obtained a VFR (visual flight rating) rating. The absence of a post-crash fire was likely due to insufficient fuel on board. No one on the ground was injured. The photograph below was taken at the scene to show the extent of damage to her aircraft. She was really lucky. I don't care who you are, that's funny!!!!! Looking for simple solutions to your real-life financial challenges? Check out WalletPop for the latest news and information, tips and calculators. No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.comVersion: 8.0.169 / Virus Database: 270.7.0/1684 - Release Date: 9/22/2008 6:39 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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