TGIF/Teenagers and Cats

[Guest guest]

This has been a cat-intensive week for us and I can attest to the fact that

there's no such thing as a " free cat. "

Penny

" Teenagers and Cats "

For all of you with teenagers or who had teenagers, you may want to know

why they really have a lot in common with cats:

1. Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by

name.

2. No matter what you do for them, it is not enough. Indeed, all humane

efforts are barely adequate to compensate for the privilege of waiting

on them hand and foot.

3. You rarely see a cat walking outside of the house with an adult human

being, and it can be safely said that no teenager in his or her right

mind wants to be seen in public with his or her parents.

4. Even if you tell jokes as well as Jay Leno, neither your cat nor your

teen will ever crack a smile.

5. No cat or teenager shares your taste in music.

6. Cats and teenagers can lie on the living-room sofa for hours on end

without moving, barely breathing.

7. Cats have nine lives. Teenagers carry on as if they did.

8. Cats and teenagers yawn in exactly the same manner, communicating

that ultimate human ecstasy -- a sense of complete and utter boredom.

9. Cats and teenagers do not improve anyone's furniture.

10. Cats that are free to roam outside sometimes have been known to

return in the middle of the night to deposit a dead animal in your

bedroom.

Teenagers are not above that sort of behavior. Thus, if you must raise

teenagers, the best sources of advice are not other parents, but

veterinarians. It is also a good idea to keep a guidebook on cats at

hand at all times. And remember, above all else, put out the food and do

not make any sudden moves in their direction.

When they make up their minds, they will finally come to you for some

affect ion and comfort, and it will be a triumphant moment for all

concerned.