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I don't really want to go into the details, but something happened at the

beginning of the week that got me to thinking.  I discussed this with my T at my

appointment today.  Why children?  Why do adults choose to pick on children? 

Because they are weak and helpless and can't defend themselves?  Because

it makes the adults feel  " big " to hurt someone so completely innocent of hatred

and gile?   There are so many horror stories of the physical and sexual abuse of

children it makes one sick.  And, how many children out there don't have the

signs of  any abuse because their scars are on the inside?  How many children

suffer because there are no signs of physical or sexual abuse because all of

those physical needs, such as food, shelter and clothing, are met?  No one

believes there is anything wrong because they don't have those physical scars. 

Who sticks up for them?   I just don't get it, and maybe I never will...maybe no

one

ever will.  I know that there are no real answers to these questions.  I just

needed to vent. Thanks for listening.

Janet 

 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own

understanding.

 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

 Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.

 It shall be health to thy navel, and marrow to thy bones.

Proverbs 3:5-8

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I don't think there is any single answer to the question of why

adults choose to pick on children. Certainly some of it has to

do with their inability to fight back. If your goal is to be a

bully, it is easier to pick someone who is powerless against

you. Some of it is more an issue with the adult's inability to

handle stress leading to abuse of the child perceived as causing

the stress or even to abuse of the child simply because the

child is the one who is available to take out their anger on.

People with bad parenting skills can abuse out of frustration

and a lack of knowledge of how to do better. Some people abuse

their children because they think that's the right way to raise

children and they don't understand how much harm their methods

are doing. Our nadas and fadas pick on their own children

because the emotions associated with a parent-child relationship

triggers their mental illness and brings out all their out of

control feelings. Pedophiles do what they do because they are

sexually attracted to children. I don't think anyone knows why

they're that way.

Our society in general needs to find better ways to protect

vulnerable children. Too often no one says anything even when

they think something wrong is going on. The reasons for not

saying anything vary, and some of them are pretty good reasons.

care is not necessarily an improvement over growing up

with a nada. Proving emotional abuse is hard. If something is

said to the authorities but not proven, the abuser may heap even

more abuse on the child afterward, or keep the child away from

anyone who could provide emotional support. Good intentions

don't always result in good outcomes.

Our society also needs to find better ways of handling mental

illnesses. When push comes to shove, much child abuse is the

result of one form or another of mental illness. If we could

better identify and help those with mental illness how many

children would be saved from abuse? Even if all we could do was

keep a closer eye on adults with mental illness to make sure

they were decent parents, that would help a lot.

At 10:17 PM 04/18/2012 Janet wrote:

>I don't really want to go into the details, but something

>happened at the beginning of the week that got me to

>thinking. I discussed this with my T at my appointment

>today. Why children? Why do adults choose to pick on

>children? Because they are weak and helpless and can't defend

>themselves? Because it makes the adults feel " big " to hurt

>someone so completely innocent of hatred and gile? There are

>so many horror stories of the physical and sexual abuse of

>children it makes one sick. And, how many children out there

>don't have the signs of any abuse because their scars are on

>the inside? How many children suffer because there are no

>signs of physical or sexual abuse because all of those physical

>needs, such as food, shelter and clothing, are met? No one

>believes there is anything wrong because they don't have those

>physical scars. Who sticks up for them? I just don't get it,

>and maybe I never will...maybe no one

> ever will. I know that there are no real answers to these

> questions. I just needed to vent. Thanks for listening.

>Janet

> Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto

> thine own understanding.

> In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy

> paths.

> Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from

> evil.

> It shall be health to thy navel, and marrow to thy bones.

>Proverbs 3:5-8

--

Katrina

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