Re: Alice, your new T today

May 7, 2012

[i just had a dream that they found out about this account, so now I'm afraid to

write this, but here goes...] :-(

Well, it was just a 30-minute " get to know you meeting, " but it lasted about

40+, and I really do think we got to know each other. It was nothing short of

amazing, and I think finding her truly was a god-send.

First off, she's an older lady who's been married for 40 years and has three or

four grown children. She will NOT be interested in me sexually in any way and

would only tell someone they were beautiful IF she thought there were some

serious self-image issues going on, and then it would be in the more general

you're-beautiful-just-the-way-you-are sense.

Second, she has an MA in understanding personality disorders, an M.Div. (she's

actually been a pastor), and she's an LPC.

Third, she seemed to understand everything I told her about me and my

relationship with nada, and she didn't think I was crazy at all. She really

seemed to " get it. " She's worked with BPs, and she's worked with non-s of all

kinds. She says that she will not ever ask nada to come into sessions with us

because nada would just try to undo any progress that had been made. She also

warned me that, as I heal and get stronger, her attacks will intensify, which -

yeah, I've experienced that before. She asked if I was going to tell nada about

the counseling. I told her I didn't think I would, and she said, " Good. She'll

notice the changes in you, anyway, and she'll try to sniff out the reason. "

She knows all about UBAM and asked if I'd read it (I have). She asked if I saw

nada as one of those types, and I told her I thought nada was a combination of

Witch/Queen, but that she's trending toward Waif now that she's getting

older/sicker. And she seemed to completely understand that.

She's also into attachment issues and play therapy, and she said she could help

me build confidence in my own mothering abilities because she totally gets why I

wouldn't be confident because nada undermines me every chance she gets. " Peck.

Peck. Peck. " T's words, not mine. Right on the money, though!

She understands funds are limited, and she's willing to work with that, even if

it means we only meet once a month. The only bad part is now I have to wait two

weeks for her to get back from Switzerland!

________________________________

Sent: Sunday, May 6, 2012 2:47 AM

Subject: Re: self sabotage- Alice, your new T today

Hi Alice,

You said you saw a new T today. That's great you found one, and so fast, too!

Aside from her assessing/noting your calm demeanor at one point, please share

how the rest of it went?

May 7, 2012