Guest guest Posted March 12, 2002 Report Share Posted March 12, 2002 Introduction > > Hello, my name is Jim. I recently passed the 1 year mark. It was on > 2-16-02. On that date I had lost 100 lbs. I had Lap RNY at Ohio State > University Hospital with Dr. Bradley Needleman. This surgery has saved my > life. I hope from this group to gain encouragement and knowledge for the > future months and years. > Best wishes, > Jim > Lap RNY 2-16-01 > 6' 6 " tall > then 385 lb. > now 285 lb. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 12, 2002 Report Share Posted March 12, 2002 In a message dated 3/12/2002 5:49:13 AM Pacific Standard Time, Jim.Rose@... writes: > Hello, my name is Jim. I recently passed the 1 year mark. It was on > 2-16-02. On that date I had lost 100 lbs. I had Lap RNY at Ohio State > University Hospital with Dr. Bradley Needleman. This surgery has saved my > life. I hope from this group to gain encouragement and knowledge for the > future months and years. > Best wishes, > Jim > Lap RNY 2-16-01 > 6' 6 " tall > then 385 lb. > now 285 lb. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 12, 2002 Report Share Posted March 12, 2002 Welcome Jim, Congradulations of you 100 pound loss on your anniversary!! What a grand day that must of been for you!! Yep, this is the spot to be if you want to keep up w/ all the WLS happenings. Its a great place to be! Donna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 29, 2012 Report Share Posted July 29, 2012 Hi, I've been feeling I should introduce myself, although it's just very overwhelming. Once I started to write an introductory post and wound up writing a 10 page document. Too much information! I know you all get it which is what really matters. And you've been wonderful with what you've shared. I've posted a couple of times about my husband, who is about 1 year NC with his emotionally abusive mother and one sister, and more aggressive, threatening, verbally abusive father and other sister. I guess his Dad falls into BPD territory with narcissistic tendencies, although his mom is kind of narcissistic. They are both upstanding citizens, very covertly abusive, able to condition you to relinquish your right to think well of yourself. (They repeatedly mocked DH's creative ventures, which could be why he is not a musician or acting today. He went to school for visual art. They minimized actions of people who emotionally abused and ridiculed DH, pressured him to be polite to them.) Spend enough time with that family and you'll on some level believe you are a very bad person. They were trying to get me to enter the family dynamic. My training had begun. Honestly it worked on me some b/c I always feel like an outsider so my first response is always, oh, they must be right...I should defer to them. But with time we started to see that this was not something sustainable. So we drew boundaries, which were trampled...and then we made bigger boundaries. It escalated to NC very quickly once we drew boundaries. Boundaries are intolerable to this enmeshed family in which everyone owes everyone else. Fortunately, we do not owe them money. I wrote recently asking about EMDR. Thanks for the replies. I also wrote to an individual describing how being a renter is a trigger for DH. I wonder if anyone else can relate to this. It's a vulnerable feeling to be living in someone else's house, even if we are paying rent and have legal posession of the house for the duration of the lease. What if the landlord bullies us when we point out things we don't like that he does. Fear of being bullied so we go back to being good submissive tenants. I could go into more detail. I am seeing a therapist myself. Life here can be unbearable at times. I am off for the summer (I teach). Dh is not working. He gets upset about things and goes off on them, venting and talking about how angry they make him, for hours. Or it turns into memories of family and how cruel they've been. I want him to get back into therapy, but i have this feeling like 1 hour/week is not enough. He needs many hours per week. Intensive therapy. An immersion into individual and group therapy...classes on self-defense... I don't want to pressure him to go to a therapist, because then it's for me. I guess I have to learn to just take care of myself, which may mean distancing myself when necessary, and let him work it out on his own some days. Today was like that. I just went out. I didn't feel bad, either. Have any of you struggled with not wanting to see a therapist? Any insights you can share? Thanks...sorry for the aimless rambling. this is why i postponed the introduction. I hope it's ok that I'm in here on my dh's behalf. I don't know of a spouses of children of bpd parents group...at least yet. Someone please tell me it's ok for me to be here? Tears are always near the surface. P/Fern Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.