Guest guest Posted August 3, 2012 Report Share Posted August 3, 2012 I enforced one of my favorite boundaries. Nada hasn't a clue what they are. I hartily agree with the assertion that our BP's needn't know our boundaries or what the consequences are so long as we consistently enforce them. Tonights boundary was...Do NOT answer calls from nada after eight in the evening (or ANYTIME I am feeling emotionally vulnerable) She inevitably leaves one of those sing song messages as if I still have a machine in the room and can hear her and will rush right over to answer, knowing it is she! I told her a few months ago to stop yelling at the beginning of her messages cause it was blasting my ears. I think what I finally told her was... " can you hear ME, when I leave messages on YOUR cell phones voicemail??? NO? Well, I can't hear you either and I am tired of getting my eardrums blasted at the beginning of all of your messages while you call my name loudly as if I can! That is why I don't listen to your messages half the time before I call you back. " She has, actually made an effort to lower her voice while leaving her messages since then, but still uses that sing song voice that makes me nasueous. Baby steps. C Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 3, 2012 Report Share Posted August 3, 2012 High five!! Even a baby step is still moving forward in the right direction. That rocks! -Annie > > I enforced one of my favorite boundaries. Nada hasn't a clue what they are. I hartily agree with the assertion that our BP's needn't know our boundaries or what the consequences are so long as we consistently enforce them. > > Tonights boundary was...Do NOT answer calls from nada after eight in the evening (or ANYTIME I am feeling emotionally vulnerable) > > She inevitably leaves one of those sing song messages as if I still have a machine in the room and can hear her and will rush right over to answer, knowing it is she! I told her a few months ago to stop yelling at the beginning of her messages cause it was blasting my ears. I think what I finally told her was... " can you hear ME, when I leave messages on YOUR cell phones voicemail??? NO? Well, I can't hear you either and I am tired of getting my eardrums blasted at the beginning of all of your messages while you call my name loudly as if I can! That is why I don't listen to your messages half the time before I call you back. " She has, actually made an effort to lower her voice while leaving her messages since then, but still uses that sing song voice that makes me nasueous. Baby steps. > > C > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2012 Report Share Posted August 5, 2012 good job!!! You're an inspiration to me! > > I enforced one of my favorite boundaries. Nada hasn't a clue what they are. I hartily agree with the assertion that our BP's needn't know our boundaries or what the consequences are so long as we consistently enforce them. > > Tonights boundary was...Do NOT answer calls from nada after eight in the evening (or ANYTIME I am feeling emotionally vulnerable) > > She inevitably leaves one of those sing song messages as if I still have a machine in the room and can hear her and will rush right over to answer, knowing it is she! I told her a few months ago to stop yelling at the beginning of her messages cause it was blasting my ears. I think what I finally told her was... " can you hear ME, when I leave messages on YOUR cell phones voicemail??? NO? Well, I can't hear you either and I am tired of getting my eardrums blasted at the beginning of all of your messages while you call my name loudly as if I can! That is why I don't listen to your messages half the time before I call you back. " She has, actually made an effort to lower her voice while leaving her messages since then, but still uses that sing song voice that makes me nasueous. Baby steps. > > C > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 5, 2012 Report Share Posted August 5, 2012 Yes -- AWESOME!! Don't you feel GREAT about yourself??!!!! Way to go! > > > > I enforced one of my favorite boundaries. Nada hasn't a clue what they are. I hartily agree with the assertion that our BP's needn't know our boundaries or what the consequences are so long as we consistently enforce them. > > > > Tonights boundary was...Do NOT answer calls from nada after eight in the evening (or ANYTIME I am feeling emotionally vulnerable) > > > > She inevitably leaves one of those sing song messages as if I still have a machine in the room and can hear her and will rush right over to answer, knowing it is she! I told her a few months ago to stop yelling at the beginning of her messages cause it was blasting my ears. I think what I finally told her was... " can you hear ME, when I leave messages on YOUR cell phones voicemail??? NO? Well, I can't hear you either and I am tired of getting my eardrums blasted at the beginning of all of your messages while you call my name loudly as if I can! That is why I don't listen to your messages half the time before I call you back. " She has, actually made an effort to lower her voice while leaving her messages since then, but still uses that sing song voice that makes me nasueous. Baby steps. > > > > C > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 6, 2012 Report Share Posted August 6, 2012 In my case nada will call, leave a message in a very low, pathetic voice as if her life is at an end, she's so helpless and hopes I'll find time to call her back (cough, cough). Although she doesn't always do the waif persona, she does when she calls me. I hate it. > > I enforced one of my favorite boundaries. Nada hasn't a clue what they are. I hartily agree with the assertion that our BP's needn't know our boundaries or what the consequences are so long as we consistently enforce them. > > Tonights boundary was...Do NOT answer calls from nada after eight in the evening (or ANYTIME I am feeling emotionally vulnerable) > > She inevitably leaves one of those sing song messages as if I still have a machine in the room and can hear her and will rush right over to answer, knowing it is she! I told her a few months ago to stop yelling at the beginning of her messages cause it was blasting my ears. I think what I finally told her was... " can you hear ME, when I leave messages on YOUR cell phones voicemail??? NO? Well, I can't hear you either and I am tired of getting my eardrums blasted at the beginning of all of your messages while you call my name loudly as if I can! That is why I don't listen to your messages half the time before I call you back. " She has, actually made an effort to lower her voice while leaving her messages since then, but still uses that sing song voice that makes me nasueous. Baby steps. > > C > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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