Guest guest Posted August 16, 2012 Report Share Posted August 16, 2012 I hate it when I get like this. I am so anxiety ridden right now, I simply cannot relax/ calm down mentally. It started when an ADT home security guy came to my door to ask if we wanted to continue service. Apparently the previous owners of this house had it (we moved in 3-4 weeks ago). I told him I wasn't sure and that I would talk to my husband about it. He pressured me to commit to a meeting. I said, " Why don't you give me your card, and if we are interested I will call you to set up a meeting. " His snappy reply was that it's not cost effective for him to pass out cards all day. What the hell??? He comes to my home at dinner time, I'm trying to feed my kids and he gets an attitude with me because I ask for a business card. It really unnerved me. Then I logged onto my email and I saw a post for a per diem job that sounded like the position I just left to stay home with my kids. They know I would love per diem work. So then I got all spun up about why didn't they call me? Do they not like me? Am I not good at my job? Turns out it's not even them, it's another company. What's wrong with me? Do any of you get spun up like this over nothing? I cause myself so much drama and I *know* it's ridiculous. The anxiety is torture. I feel it in my chest. I hate it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 17, 2012 Report Share Posted August 17, 2012 Dear , I am truly sorry that you are feeling anxiety right now. Moving is stressful and then adding a change in employment, children, a jerk at the door and then the email it is enough to send anyone into a spin. I notice I have to get adequate rest or I am vulnerable to being sensitive, viewing interactions negatively, and being hyper-vigiliant for slights. I then become very reactive. I guess when I don't get enough rest I am more prone to react to negative behavior versus respond in a tactful manner. I have recently become aware that when someone does or says something that reminds me of painful incidents, comments my NADA made during my adolescence I will become very defensive with the person. Did the rep's abrasive and intrusive manner remind you of your NADA? Did the email following the incident seem to reinforce negativity she has spewed? The ADT sales rep sounds like a bully who is unprofessional and discourteous. He chooses inconvenient times as one, that is when a high number of people are home; and two, most people when distracted will agree to a future meeting, etc. I hope today becomes better for you. Maybe Calgon can take you away for a few minutes. MyReality67 > > I hate it when I get like this. I am so anxiety ridden right now, I simply cannot relax/ calm down mentally. It started when an ADT home security guy came to my door to ask if we wanted to continue service. Apparently the previous owners of this house had it (we moved in 3-4 weeks ago). I told him I wasn't sure and that I would talk to my husband about it. He pressured me to commit to a meeting. I said, " Why don't you give me your card, and if we are interested I will call you to set up a meeting. " His snappy reply was that it's not cost effective for him to pass out cards all day. What the hell??? He comes to my home at dinner time, I'm trying to feed my kids and he gets an attitude with me because I ask for a business card. It really unnerved me. Then I logged onto my email and I saw a post for a per diem job that sounded like the position I just left to stay home with my kids. They know I would love per diem work. So then I got all spun up about why didn't they call me? Do they not like me? Am I not good at my job? Turns out it's not even them, it's another company. > What's wrong with me? Do any of you get spun up like this over nothing? I cause myself so much drama and I *know* it's ridiculous. The anxiety is torture. I feel it in my chest. I hate it. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 17, 2012 Report Share Posted August 17, 2012 , Moving is stressful for most people. I imagine that's contributing to your current anxiety. Being in a new place can be anxiety-inducing even apart from the actual move because you're not familiar with things yet and it is easier to be startled by what you don't expect. I don't think your were wound up over nothing either. The ADT guy sounds like a jerk who should be reported to the company management. Business cards exist for passing out. Legitimate business people don't refuse to give them to people they're trying to do business with. Did he ever end up giving you one? I wonder whether he really even works for ADT or whether that could have been a scam to get into your house. If he was legitimate, he was unprofessional and rude. The job advertisement does sound more like getting upset over nothing but you were already feeling upset about the ADT jerk and that probably colored your reaction. I'd say that you should give yourself permission to feel some amount of stress and anxiety as is appropriate to having moved. Stressing out over feeling stressed can turn into a vicious cycle. How about playing music that you find relaxing in the background to help keep you in a calm frame of mind? Another idea is to treat yourself to soaking in the bath with some nicely scented bath oil or bubblebath in the evening a few times a week. More sleep might be helpful too if you're not getting enough. Some people find that regular excercise helps decrease anxiety. If nothing else, it tends to help with getting a good night's sleep. It might also help to make a list of the legitimate reasons you have for feeling anxiety then come up with possible plans for dealing with them. I find that having plans for what to do helps a lot with anxiety, whether it is fear of nada or fear of other things. Defining the real problems by putting them in writing (or typing) can help make things more clear and eliminate worrying about undefined possibilities. Instead of being like the little kid who is afraid of unknown monsters under the bed, you can be the kid who doesn't have to be afraid any more because while there's a monster under the bed, he knows its name is " Fred " and it can be scared away with a simple squirt gun filled with water. At 11:27 PM 08/16/2012 wrote: >I hate it when I get like this. I am so anxiety ridden right >now, I simply cannot relax/ calm down mentally. It started when >an ADT home security guy came to my door to ask if we wanted to >continue service. Apparently the previous owners of this house >had it (we moved in 3-4 weeks ago). I told him I wasn't sure >and that I would talk to my husband about it. He pressured me >to commit to a meeting. I said, " Why don't you give me your >card, and if we are interested I will call you to set up a >meeting. " His snappy reply was that it's not cost effective for >him to pass out cards all day. What the hell??? He comes to my >home at dinner time, I'm trying to feed my kids and he gets an >attitude with me because I ask for a business card. It really >unnerved me. Then I logged onto my email and I saw a post for a >per diem job that sounded like the position I just left to stay >home with my kids. They know I would love per diem work. So >then I got all spun up about why didn't they call me? Do they >not like me? Am I not good at my job? Turns out it's not even >them, it's another company. >What's wrong with me? Do any of you get spun up like this over >nothing? I cause myself so much drama and I *know* it's >ridiculous. The anxiety is torture. I feel it in my chest. I >hate it. -- Katrina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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