Want to break NC. Anyone have success with that?

[Guest guest]

My birthday is tomorrow and I will be 35. I dont know if its because of my

birthday or because 35 is a milestone for me but I am thinking contacting nada.

I have been thinking about it for a while.

Maybe its because I said that 35 is when I would end my 4 year long fertility

struggle and consider adoption.

Maybe its because I realize that I am almost 40 and have only barely begun to

enjoy my life since Ive been NC.

Maybe its because I know my nada is close to the end of her life and I want to

repent.

Im not sure why, but I have had this desire to resume contact for a while.

We went NC about 3 years ago when a series of continous arguing and bashing of

my husband came to a halt and she basically told me I was dead to her. Ive heard

from her sporadically (birthday and Christmas cards, family weddings and

funerals, etc) but never have had a serious discussion and sit down since our

NC.

Has anyone gone through this? Success with it or am I insane for even thinking

this?

PLEASE any advice is appreciated!

AJ