Parental Alienation Syndrome, expanded

[Guest guest]

My parents finally legally separated when I was 15 years old. After several

years of dealing with Mother’s BPD rages, I went to live with my father (my

younger sister stayed with Nada). After the separation, and during the divorce

proceedings, the Nada engaged in a really crazy distortion campaign of horrible

lies and manipulations, to make my father suffer, and because I was living with

him, I was the backup target of her crazy rages. My sister was too young to

know better, and believed what her mother told her.

It has only been within the past 7 years or so (when my sister and I were firmly

entrenched in our 40s) that my sister started to realize that she had been fed a

steady diet of BS and ugly lies, many of them about me. The mother unit cycled

several years ago, and suddenly made my sister her enemy, and the lies and

distortions began flying. While it’s sad that it took so long, I think my

sister has a clearer understanding of who I am as a person, and that I’m

actually a pretty decent guy!

Sister and I will never be as close as some siblings, due to the rift created by

Nada, but we’re doing better. The damage a BPD parent can do with family

alienation is amazing, and sad. How sad that their mental illness creates

suspicion and caution within the other members of the BPD family. The toxicity

is amazing, and frightening, too.

Take care,

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I'm glad that you and your younger sister were able to connect on at least some

level as siblings, despite the decades of negative, alienating influence by your

bpd mother.

That says something about how generally mentally healthy you and your sister

both are, that you were both able to gain some real insight and perspective RE

your mother's mental illness, and made the effort to get to know each other as

adults.

I agree with you; being parented by someone who is genuinely mentally ill with a

personality disorder (aka a character disorder, an earlier term that means the

same thing) has the potential to actually warp a child's trajectory in life.

We're all lucky that we survived as well as we have, frankly, in my own opinion.

There truly is an enormous need for more public awareness of personality

disorder and how it can have a devastatingly negative impact on the children of

parents with pds. I think that in the same way that children are NOW removed

from the " care " of pedophile parents (when a pedo parent is caught/exposed) or

drug-abusing parents or physically violent parents or horribly negligent

parents, I think that children need similar protection from

personality-disordered parents, who can be quite violent, physically abusive,

emotionally abusive, shockingly negligent, and even sexually abusive, as mine

was.

-Annie

>

> My parents finally legally separated when I was 15 years old. After several

years of dealing with Mother’s BPD rages, I went to live with my father (my

younger sister stayed with Nada). After the separation, and during the divorce

proceedings, the Nada engaged in a really crazy distortion campaign of horrible

lies and manipulations, to make my father suffer, and because I was living with

him, I was the backup target of her crazy rages. My sister was too young to

know better, and believed what her mother told her.

>

> It has only been within the past 7 years or so (when my sister and I were

firmly entrenched in our 40s) that my sister started to realize that she had

been fed a steady diet of BS and ugly lies, many of them about me. The mother

unit cycled several years ago, and suddenly made my sister her enemy, and the

lies and distortions began flying. While it’s sad that it took so long, I

think my sister has a clearer understanding of who I am as a person, and that

I’m actually a pretty decent guy!

>

> Sister and I will never be as close as some siblings, due to the rift created

by Nada, but we’re doing better. The damage a BPD parent can do with family

alienation is amazing, and sad. How sad that their mental illness creates

suspicion and caution within the other members of the BPD family. The toxicity

is amazing, and frightening, too.

>

> Take care,

>

>