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Holiday Insights

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Today is Christmas. I'm not going to say that the first holiday season after

nada's death has been easy, but I am here to say that it has been liberating and

somewhat beautiful.

Recently one of my former student's mother's gave me a little gift of mulling

spices and for the first time since 1979 I've made Wassail, my mother's favorite

holiday punch. Okay, so she would spike it with whatever alcohol was handy, get

drunk and make a scene but, my fruit juice version tastes heavenly and fills my

California kitchen with the scents of the old Kentucky farm house. I've

reclaimed a tradition I allowed my mother to rob from me and I'm enjoying it

even if my husband won't touch it! Therein lays my insight. Holiday traditions

don't have to include dozens of in-laws, large crowds of friends, costly travel

or lavish gifts. Holiday traditions are the things you chose to do year after

year because they are meaningful and warm your heart. So turn on IT'S A

WONDERFUL LIFE, bake cookies, call your best friend, go drop a warm coat in the

Salvation Army collection box, or order Chinese food and devour it in your

bathrobe. Do what feels right to you. You aren't missing anything that's real.

You are missing what your mind tells you that you don't or can't have.

Therefore, I hereby by grant you the gift of being allowed to turn off that

nightmare voice. Go ahead, blame it on me. Turn off that voice and go turn on

the carols. Do what you want to do. Make some new traditions. Don't be afraid to

live. After all, we've already survived one of the worst things that can happen

in life. Don't we deserve a little joy? Virgin Wassail anyone?

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