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A letter to my family...

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Thank you, dear friends, for all your letters... they gave me great

comfort, knowing I was simply trying to find a way to express my fears

from the surgery, and not that I was going mad...

My fears, I think, are still withing reason, as I am not going to let

them discourage me from my goal of winning this battle... I am still

optimistic, as I know this is the right way to go- true, it has its

risks, but staying fat is even more risky and I won't be happy knowing I

gave up...

You know, two weeks ago my boyfriend and I were up north, in the

Galilee, for a few days' vacation... and we went for a hike and it

turned out to be a very very difficult climb on the side of a

mountain... I kept complianing that it was difficult and we stopped

every few minutes so I could catch my breath-- but I didn't give up and

we reached the top and it was well worth it !

What I am trying to say is, I may whine and complain and be scared now

and all of this makes it easioer for me to handle the difficulties- but

i'll be damned if i let a difficulty or a risk stand in my way for

happiness and a better life !!

I am leaving the option of writing this letter open, to the week prior

to surgery. If i still need it then, I will write it and deposit it with

my therapist, so as not to show anyone around, including my boyfriend,

that I am worried... they should only see a confident, happy face... And

if I decide not to write it... well, my family *knows* I love them, I am

very close to my extended family (aunts and uncles) and I have spent a

lot of time with all of them in the last years... I have no unfinished

buisness-- nor any regrets...

So for now... I pursue my life with the reassurance I can and will make

things better... and tomorrow... tomorrow I should have my date !!!

Thank you again, friends, I can think of no better word-- because I feel

so close to all of you (even though I must be the baby around here, at

22)-- and I am so grateful for all your support...

I have been blessed by a wonderful, supportive family, an amazing

partner in my life (who also happens to be cute as hell) and such dear

friends on and off line... I could not be more certain in my decision

now...

~ Dorit in Israel

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