Guest guest Posted June 15, 2011 Report Share Posted June 15, 2011 Okay, so I'm a month deep into my latest exacerbation. I guess the dog getting into the trash this morning made hubby decide that we needed " heavy cleaning " in the living room, front hall, and and partially the " dining room " that is really just storage and extra " den " space. So hubby calls me into the living room, says " Can you please work on the living room? " I agree, start picking up some stuff that had fallen off the table by the window, folding the afghan's, moving the dog's stuff into the dining room so we can vacuum, in general, general straightening up, and prepping for vacuuming. Hubby swept and mopped the hallway, goes to vacuum the living room, and implies that I'm not doing enough - actually, implies that he's doing everything (which he wasn't). Mind you, since the temperature outside is passable, the a/c hasn't been kicking on, and we were all working up a sweat and getting hot. He tells me to sweep the dining room among other things, and he gets mad when I asked him to move stuff that I couldn't so I could sweep there. So I pointed out to him that I had previously asked him we not get into heavy cleaning on more than one room a day when I was feeling okay, much less when I'm neck deep in a flare. So he goes on a rant about he works through it, blah blah blah (I think if I hadn't complained, we would have been moving furniture out of the living room and deep cleaning the carpets). I didn't say anything, just finished the living room, told him I was taking my pain medication. But it drives me nuts that he thinks I can push through like I did 7 years ago (before we moved into this house) and we would like, power clean the whole living room and kitchen area. Thank goodness we didn't touch the kitchen today. Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2011 Report Share Posted June 15, 2011 Tina has he ever gone to a drs appointment with you? Maybe if the dr explained to him what you go through he might lay off some. You are in my prayers. Hugs nne To the world you might be one person, but to one person you just might be the world " " May the Lord Bless you and keep you, May the Lord Make his face shine upon you, and give you Peace...Forever " Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://breastcancerpatientssoulmatesforlife.bravehost.com/ Anxiety Depression and Breast Cancer http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/AnxietyDepressionandBreastCancer Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com The Cancer Club www.cancerclub.com > Vent..hubby..cleaning > > Okay, so I'm a month deep into my latest exacerbation. I guess the dog > getting into the trash this morning made hubby decide that we needed > " heavy > cleaning " in the living room, front hall, and and partially the " dining > room " that is really just storage and extra " den " space. > > So hubby calls me into the living room, says " Can you please work on the > living room? " I agree, start picking up some stuff that had fallen off > the > table by the window, folding the afghan's, moving the dog's stuff into > the > dining room so we can vacuum, in general, general straightening up, and > prepping for vacuuming. Hubby swept and mopped the hallway, goes to > vacuum > the living room, and implies that I'm not doing enough - actually, > implies > that he's doing everything (which he wasn't). Mind you, since the > temperature outside is passable, the a/c hasn't been kicking on, and we > were > all working up a sweat and getting hot. He tells me to sweep the dining > room among other things, and he gets mad when I asked him to move stuff > that > I couldn't so I could sweep there. So I pointed out to him that I had > previously asked him we not get into heavy cleaning on more than one room > a > day when I was feeling okay, much less when I'm neck deep in a flare. So > he > goes on a rant about he works through it, blah blah blah (I think if I > hadn't complained, we would have been moving furniture out of the living > room and deep cleaning the carpets). I didn't say anything, just > finished > the living room, told him I was taking my pain medication. But it drives > me > nuts that he thinks I can push through like I did 7 years ago (before we > moved into this house) and we would like, power clean the whole living > room > and kitchen area. Thank goodness we didn't touch the kitchen today. > > Tina ____________________________________________________________ Share photos & screenshots in seconds... TRY FREE IM TOOLPACK at http://www.imtoolpack.com/default.aspx?rc=if1 Works in all emails, instant messengers, blogs, forums and social networks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2011 Report Share Posted June 15, 2011 TinaPerhaps it would help for you and hubby to go to joint counseling. But you would need to find a counselor that understands MS and I don't know how easy that would be. I would recommend calling your local National MS Society and ask for help. They may know of counselors near you. Also ask them if they have educational material that would help your hubby understand better. Hopefully there is hope for hubby!big hugs to you SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: mserslife <mserslife >Sent: Wed, June 15, 2011 12:41:27 PMSubject: Vent..hubby..cleaning Okay, so I'm a month deep into my latest exacerbation. I guess the dog getting into the trash this morning made hubby decide that we needed "heavy cleaning" in the living room, front hall, and and partially the "dining room" that is really just storage and extra "den" space. So hubby calls me into the living room, says "Can you please work on the living room?" I agree, start picking up some stuff that had fallen off the table by the window, folding the afghan's, moving the dog's stuff into the dining room so we can vacuum, in general, general straightening up, and prepping for vacuuming. Hubby swept and mopped the hallway, goes to vacuum the living room, and implies that I'm not doing enough - actually, implies that he's doing everything (which he wasn't). Mind you, since the temperature outside is passable, the a/c hasn't been kicking on, and we were all working up a sweat and getting hot. He tells me to sweep the dining room among other things, and he gets mad when I asked him to move stuff that I couldn't so I could sweep there. So I pointed out to him that I had previously asked him we not get into heavy cleaning on more than one room a day when I was feeling okay, much less when I'm neck deep in a flare. So he goes on a rant about he works through it, blah blah blah (I think if I hadn't complained, we would have been moving furniture out of the living room and deep cleaning the carpets). I didn't say anything, just finished the living room, told him I was taking my pain medication. But it drives me nuts that he thinks I can push through like I did 7 years ago (before we moved into this house) and we would like, power clean the whole living room and kitchen area. Thank goodness we didn't touch the kitchen today. Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2011 Report Share Posted June 15, 2011 Ironically, he's sat in on every neuro appointment, held my hand while I " ve cried about this nerve pain...I think it's his mother's fault....she pushed through everything when she doesn't feel good to get things done in the house, still does and it makes her sicker. He didn't even react a little while ago when I told that I was hurting. He thinks it's on par with his back hurting from mopping and vacuuming (?).Tina Tina has he ever gone to a drs appointment with you? Maybe if the dr explained to him what you go through he might lay off some. You are in my prayers. Hugs nne To the world you might be one person, but to one person you just might be the world " " May the Lord Bless you and keep you, May the Lord Make his face shine upon you, and give you Peace...Forever " Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://breastcancerpatientssoulmatesforlife.bravehost.com/ Anxiety Depression and Breast Cancer http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/AnxietyDepressionandBreastCancer Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com The Cancer Club www.cancerclub.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2011 Report Share Posted June 15, 2011 I thought about the counseling thing Monday when I was at my counselor and I was saying how he just doesn't get it. But I " m assuming Medicare doesn't cover joint counseling, I know Medicaid doesn't cover it, and we just can't swing it right now. I'm going to look through some of of the material I have from the NMSS and see if that works, but I think maybe I need to get him in touch with other partners of people with MS as well. Tina TinaPerhaps it would help for you and hubby to go to joint counseling. But you would need to find a counselor that understands MS and I don't know how easy that would be. I would recommend calling your local National MS Society and ask for help. They may know of counselors near you. Also ask them if they have educational material that would help your hubby understand better. Hopefully there is hope for hubby! big hugs to you SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: mserslife <mserslife > Sent: Wed, June 15, 2011 12:41:27 PMSubject: Vent..hubby..cleaning Okay, so I'm a month deep into my latest exacerbation. I guess the dog getting into the trash this morning made hubby decide that we needed " heavy cleaning " in the living room, front hall, and and partially the " dining room " that is really just storage and extra " den " space. So hubby calls me into the living room, says " Can you please work on the living room? " I agree, start picking up some stuff that had fallen off the table by the window, folding the afghan's, moving the dog's stuff into the dining room so we can vacuum, in general, general straightening up, and prepping for vacuuming. Hubby swept and mopped the hallway, goes to vacuum the living room, and implies that I'm not doing enough - actually, implies that he's doing everything (which he wasn't). Mind you, since the temperature outside is passable, the a/c hasn't been kicking on, and we were all working up a sweat and getting hot. He tells me to sweep the dining room among other things, and he gets mad when I asked him to move stuff that I couldn't so I could sweep there. So I pointed out to him that I had previously asked him we not get into heavy cleaning on more than one room a day when I was feeling okay, much less when I'm neck deep in a flare. So he goes on a rant about he works through it, blah blah blah (I think if I hadn't complained, we would have been moving furniture out of the living room and deep cleaning the carpets). I didn't say anything, just finished the living room, told him I was taking my pain medication. But it drives me nuts that he thinks I can push through like I did 7 years ago (before we moved into this house) and we would like, power clean the whole living room and kitchen area. Thank goodness we didn't touch the kitchen today. Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2011 Report Share Posted June 15, 2011 That's a good idea, Tina. I don't know how large a town you live in but sometimes the NMSS has support groups for spouses.hugs SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: MSersLife Sent: Wed, June 15, 2011 7:18:32 PMSubject: Re: Vent..hubby..cleaning I thought about the counseling thing Monday when I was at my counselor and I was saying how he just doesn't get it. But I"m assuming Medicare doesn't cover joint counseling, I know Medicaid doesn't cover it, and we just can't swing it right now. I'm going to look through some of of the material I have from the NMSS and see if that works, but I think maybe I need to get him in touch with other partners of people with MS as well. Tina TinaPerhaps it would help for you and hubby to go to joint counseling. But you would need to find a counselor that understands MS and I don't know how easy that would be. I would recommend calling your local National MS Society and ask for help. They may know of counselors near you. Also ask them if they have educational material that would help your hubby understand better. Hopefully there is hope for hubby! big hugs to you SharonThis email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. To: mserslife <mserslife > Sent: Wed, June 15, 2011 12:41:27 PMSubject: Vent..hubby..cleaning Okay, so I'm a month deep into my latest exacerbation. I guess the dog getting into the trash this morning made hubby decide that we needed "heavy cleaning" in the living room, front hall, and and partially the "dining room" that is really just storage and extra "den" space. So hubby calls me into the living room, says "Can you please work on the living room?" I agree, start picking up some stuff that had fallen off the table by the window, folding the afghan's, moving the dog's stuff into the dining room so we can vacuum, in general, general straightening up, and prepping for vacuuming. Hubby swept and mopped the hallway, goes to vacuum the living room, and implies that I'm not doing enough - actually, implies that he's doing everything (which he wasn't). Mind you, since the temperature outside is passable, the a/c hasn't been kicking on, and we were all working up a sweat and getting hot. He tells me to sweep the dining room among other things, and he gets mad when I asked him to move stuff that I couldn't so I could sweep there. So I pointed out to him that I had previously asked him we not get into heavy cleaning on more than one room a day when I was feeling okay, much less when I'm neck deep in a flare. So he goes on a rant about he works through it, blah blah blah (I think if I hadn't complained, we would have been moving furniture out of the living room and deep cleaning the carpets). I didn't say anything, just finished the living room, told him I was taking my pain medication. But it drives me nuts that he thinks I can push through like I did 7 years ago (before we moved into this house) and we would like, power clean the whole living room and kitchen area. Thank goodness we didn't touch the kitchen today. Tina Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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