CHRISTMAS COOKIE RULES...

[Guest guest]

P PM (Polymositis) 12/98, UIP 8/00, o2 24/7 9 LPM 8/04, PH 3/06, ILL yo 60

Very good info for the holidays!!

Christmas

Cookie Rules

1. If you eat a Christmas Cookie, fresh

out of the

oven, it has no calories because everyone knows that the first cookie

is the test and thus calorie free.

2. If you drink a diet soda after eating your second cookie, it

also has no calories because the diet soda cancels out the cookie

calories.

3. If a friend comes over while you are making your Christmas

Cookies and needs to sample, you must sample with your friend. Because

your friend's first cookie is calories free, rule #1, yours is also.

It would be rude to let your friend sample alone and being the friend

that you are, that makes your cookie calorie free.

4. Any cookie calories consumed while walking around will fall to

your feet and eventually fall off as you move. This is due to gravity

and the density of the caloric mass.

5. Any calories consumed during the frosting of the Christmas

Cookies will be used up because it takes many calories to lick excess

frosting from a knife without cutting your tongue.

6. Cookies colored red or green have very few calories. Red ones

have 3 and Green ones have 5 - one calorie for each letter. Make more

red ones!

7. If you eat cookies while watching "Miracle on 34th Street"

these also have no calories because they are part of the entertainment

package and not part of one's personal fuel.

8. As always, cookie pieces contain no calories because the

process of breaking causes calorie leakage.

9. Any cookies consumed from someone else's plate has no calories

since the calories rightfully belong to the other person and will cling

to their plate. We all know how calories like to CLING!

And finally...

10. Any cookies consumed while feeling stressed has no calories

because cookies used for medicinal purposes NEVER have calories. It's

a rule!

"Sounds good to me!!

"Merry

Christmas and God Bless Everyone!!