Joyce Dalton's Memorial Service

[Guest guest]

I haven't posted because what can I possibly say... yet I feel I

need to share at least a few things. My husband luckily took the

call when Lucian called to tell me Joyce had passed. When I did

speak with him personally I can't tell you how tough yet wonderful

the conversation was. He really needed me and all of us to know

that Joyce went the way he and she had prayed she would, in peace,

without pain and with family around. He said it was like a whisper

and she was gone. After telling him what a treat it was to witness

a couple who so clearly loved each other, but really liked each

other. Lucian said that when Joyce could barely speak she still

took the time and made the effort to take his hand and say, " you are

so good to me " . Do you need any simpler example of what a good

woman Joyce was at loving, appreciating and expressing it and doing

so when it meant the most. Did I mention these two were just

wonderful together, a pair that was perfect for each other. In the

following days I kept checking to see if I could do anything to

help. Nothing was needed, but even so I wanted to visit w/ Lucian.

I called to tell Lucian I was coming over and he said he had

received a card from Blue Bell, PA and I immediately said oh, from

Zion. He laughed and said yes. He said he was really having

a tough morning and the girls had both headed out for the day when

he opened 's card and it made him laugh. He had no idea we

referred to Joyce as the Queen. If ever you think that those cards

or contact with people don't make a difference know they do. Lucian

said he had been trying to think about what to say at the service

and here a woman he had never met had painted a picture eloquently.

At that moment I realized there was something I could do. In

mourning the loss of my mother one of the most powerful and

rewarding experiences was to talk to others who knew her. From

childhood friends to new friends, neighbors, doctors and support

group members (my mother was a breast cancer survivor). I decided

to bring Lucian a small sampling of the board members comments about

Joyce. I tried to give a sampling of newer members, long time

members, different ways of expressing our feelings. I printed ones

from across the country and across the world to show the impact this

one woman that he loved had. I knew some had sent cards and he had

spoken to Peggy, Leanne and I. I brought him individual posts from

Caro, Ken, Joy, , , and Geeta. I took them to him and

read them aloud. I can't tell you how much Geeta's post and poem

touched me. I had the most difficult time reading it to him, but

obviously it touched him. Lucian said he wanted to speak today if

he could find the strength. He was wonderful and I was so proud of

him. He told the entire gathering about 's card and how it

made him laugh, he told about the group and what it meant to Joyce.

He told about the Foundation and how Leanne was there. He used

comments from us including that I told him I could print him

thousands of pages and never sum the feelings of the group, he spoke

of Peggy's longing to be there, and quoted all the posts I gave him

and closed w/ Geeta's poem. Joyce's pastor officiated the service

and it was beautiful. As I sobed for my loss I tried to focus on

the beauty of the stained glass in front of me, the fantastic

portrait of Joyce and the beautiful flowers the voices of Joyces

church members poured in from the back. They sang there acapella

and were stunning! Oh, and Vicky's daisy's that she requested

Leanne pick from my garden were hand delivered on her behalf. We

spent the next couple hours visiting w/ Joyce's friends and family

in her home and shared the good cooking of her church family. Today

has been an emotional day. I left Lucian w/ a couple dates planned

for walks in the park, breakfasts, lunches and coffee's. I will

continue to enjoy my relationship w/ the Dalton family. Please know

that they appreciate all of you and would be happy that you have now

shared in the day.

Good night,

Kerry