on the passing of parents--for Kate and group

[Guest guest]

I was born prematurely when my father was 40 (3 days short of41),and my mother was 2 months short of 38.I was the afterthought child--the 6th--of parents who apparentlywere "fertile as a plowed row," as they often said. Fortunately,my mother went into menopause shortly after my birth.I have two memories of each of my parents which I should liketo either bore you or entertain you with:My mother, who lived to just under 102, and was acquired Englishas a second language, after Italian, was very concerned about ouruse of language, and how we treated others. She advised each ofus--at about our 5th birthdays:"Dear, when you go out into the world, and you encounter others,you must treat each person in such a manner that

each feels thathis or her day has been made the better for having encountered you."My mother was a pianist; she understood 'harmony."I memorized this and trotted up to my father's study and recited thisto him, to which he replied: "Kid! Do whatchour Mama says!Listen to your Mama!"My father, on the other hand, had his own little lecture-ettes whichhe doled out in his usual attorney-like fashion (he was an attorney):"Kid, you are an egg-head!" (made sense to me; I was his daughter)."So, kid, when you grow up, you will probably marry an egg-head!"(Whaaaaaaat????)"Egg-heads often are very knowledgeable, but often do not earn muchmoney (Pop was a multi-millionaire.) So, when you marry, do NOT have charge accounts!" (pre-credit-card era).Sooo, off I went to look up the word "egg-head," which apparentlydid not mean what I had thought that it might

mean. Heaved sighof relieve that the term meant "intellectual," not with a head and faceshaped like an egg!My father was the most generous soul in the world, and my motherthe most comforting. I just adored them.We who have had even one memorable and admirable parent arevery fortunate. My father eventually died of MS--at the tender ageof just under 97. My mother finally developed probable Alzheimer'sDisease and mistook me for one of her dearest college friends--at least we had a relationship until she died.Love to each of you here, especially those who have experiencedthe loss of one or both parents---kind of shocking way to grow up,n