Re: How do you tell your kids?

[Guest guest]

Hi Bobbi,

My kids were 13 and 15 when I was diagnosed; however, I had been sick

since they were 6 and 8. I have always told them the name of what is

going on and then let them ask questions at their own pace. As they

have gotten older the questions have gone further into detail. Kids,

at least mine, are very perceptive and often know when something is

not right, my oldest, now 20 can look at me and know what kind of day

I am having. SO I guess my suggestion is to let your daughter set the

pace, she I asume knows he was in the hospital so I would start there

and ask her what questions she has and ask her how you can help her to

understand what is goin on.

I hope it goes well

DAwn

>

> How do you explain to your kids that mommy or daddy is sick? We have

a 9 year old and she

> has NO idea of his illness. He hasn't had any serious symptoms until

recently but eventually

> we're going to have to tell her something.

>

[Guest guest]

Bobbi,

Hi! I truly feel for you and your family. It can't be easy to tell your child

something that you know will change their life forever. I know whatever choice

you and your family make, it will be the right one. I don't have any children

of my own, so I realize it is not the same thing, but I have had to explain to

several children about my being sick. In my opinion, honesty is the best

solution. I never wanted to worry about them overhearing something and letting

their imaginations run away with them or leave them feeling shut out and left in

the dark. I let them know that I was ill and that my illness was called PSC. I

told them that there may be days when I'm not like the Sandi they're used to,

where I'm too tired to play and need naps, where I'm too sore or nauseous to eat

dinner or read stories or give baths, pick them up, etc. I left it pretty basic

and allowed the kids to ask whatever questions they wanted. I assured them that

the way I

felt about them would never ever change in a million years and that I'd always

be there for them in every possible way that I could, but that some days would

be harder than others. For the most part, what I said was just accepted. My

little cousin asked me if I was going to die. I told him that nobody knows when

they're going to die but that my plan was to play with him and love him and read

him stories every single day that I could for the rest of my life. This seemed

to satisfy him. I just let the kids know that I'm always there for questions

and that they should never be scared to ask me anything whenever it is they feel

like asking it. (A dangerous proposition, I know!)

I hope you are able to find an answer that works for you and your family. I'm

keeping good thoughts for all of you!

Sandi in VA