Re: First Date Story

[Guest guest]

Oh thats FUNNNNY  OUCH AND BURRRRRRRRRR Love & Prayers, PeggyFlorida,  IPF/UIP 2004"I believe that friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet, when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."   If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope > you're sitting > > down when > you read it. This is probably the funniest date > story ever, first > date or > not!!! > > We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake. > Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most > embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The > winner > described her worst first date experience. There > was > absolutely no question as to why her tale took the > prize! > > She said it was midwinter... Snowing and quite > cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the > mountains > outside Salt Lake City , Utah . It was a day trip > (no > overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had > never > met before. The outing was fun but relatively > uneventful > until they were headed home late that afternoon. > > They were driving back down the mountain, when she > gradually began > to > realize that she should not have had that extra > latte. They > were about an hou r away from anywhere with a rest > room and > in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested > she try > to hold it, which she did for a while. > Unfortunately, > because of the heavy snow and slow going, there > came a point > where she told him that he had better stop and let > her go > beside the road, or it would be the front seat of > his car. > > They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the > car, > yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow > she > didn't have good footing, so she let her butt > rest > against the rear fender t o steady herself. > Her companion stood on the side of the car > watching for traffic and indeed was a real > gentleman and > refrained from peeking. All she could think about > was the > relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing > nature of > the situation. > > Upon finishing however, she soon became > aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up > her > pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were > firmly > glued against the car's f ender. Thoughts of > tongues > frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she > attempted to > disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was > quickly > apparent that she had a brand new problem. Due to > the > extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware > of the > humor of the moment, she answered her date's > concerns about 'what is taking so long' > with a reply > that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt > off' and in > need of some assistance! > > He came around the car as she tried to cover > herself with her sweater and then, as she looked > imploringly > into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got > the > giggles and when they finally managed to compose > themselves, > they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical > as the > situation was, they also were faced with a real > problem. > Both agreed it would take something hot to free her > chilly > cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! > > Thinking about what had gotten her into the > predicament in the > first place, > both quickly realized that there was only one way > to get her > free. So, as she looked the other way, her first > time date > proceeded to > unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. > > As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the > Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that > should be > 'pants down'. And you thought your first > date was > embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment...'This > gives > a whole new meaning to being pissed off. 'Oh, > and how did > the first date turn out? He became her husband and > was > sitting next to her on the Leno show. > > > > > > > > Forgiveness means releasing the right to make someone > wrong. 

[Guest guest]

Priceless! Just priceless.

MamaSher, age 70. IPF 3-06, OR. NasturtiumsDon't fret about tomorrow, God is already there!

First Date Story

If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope > you're sitting > > down when > you read it. This is probably the funniest date > story ever, first > date or > not!!! > > We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake. > Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most > embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The > winner > described her worst first date experience. There > was > absolutely no question as to why her tale took the > prize! > > She said it was midwinter... Snowing and quite > cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the > mountains > outside Salt Lake City , Utah . It was a day trip > (no > overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had > never > met before. The outing was fun but relatively > uneventful > until they were headed home late that afternoon. > > They were driving back down the mountain, when she > gradually began > to > realize that she should not have had that extra > latte. They > were about an hou r away from anywhere with a rest > room and > in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested > she try > to hold it, which she did for a while. > Unfortunately, > because of the heavy snow and slow going, there > came a point > where she told him that he had better stop and let > her go > beside the road, or it would be the front seat of > his car. > > They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the > car, > yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow > she > didn't have good footing, so she let her butt > rest > against the rear fender t o steady herself. > Her companion stood on the side of the car > watching for traffic and indeed was a real > gentleman and > refrained from peeking. All she could think about > was the > relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing > nature of > the situation. > > Upon finishing however, she soon became > aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up > her > pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were > firmly > glued against the car's f ender. Thoughts of > tongues > frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she > attempted to > disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was > quickly > apparent that she had a brand new problem. Due to > the > extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware > of the > humor of the moment, she answered her date's > concerns about 'what is taking so long' > with a reply > that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt > off' and in > need of some assistance! > > He came around the car as she tried to cover > herself with her sweater and then, as she looked > imploringly > into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got > the > giggles and when they finally managed to compose > themselves, > they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical > as the > situation was, they also were faced with a real > problem. > Both agreed it would take something hot to free her > chilly > cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! > > Thinking about what had gotten her into the > predicament in the > first place, > both quickly realized that there was only one way > to get her > free. So, as she looked the other way, her first > time date > proceeded to > unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. > > As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the > Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that > should be > 'pants down'. And you thought your first > date was > embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment...'This > gives > a whole new meaning to being pissed off. 'Oh, > and how did > the first date turn out? He became her husband and > was > sitting next to her on the Leno show. > > > > > > > > Forgiveness means releasing the right to make someone > wrong.

[Guest guest]

Priceless! Just priceless.

MamaSher, age 70. IPF 3-06, OR. NasturtiumsDon't fret about tomorrow, God is already there!

First Date Story

If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope > you're sitting > > down when > you read it. This is probably the funniest date > story ever, first > date or > not!!! > > We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake. > Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most > embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The > winner > described her worst first date experience. There > was > absolutely no question as to why her tale took the > prize! > > She said it was midwinter... Snowing and quite > cold... and the guy had taken her skiing in the > mountains > outside Salt Lake City , Utah . It was a day trip > (no > overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had > never > met before. The outing was fun but relatively > uneventful > until they were headed home late that afternoon. > > They were driving back down the mountain, when she > gradually began > to > realize that she should not have had that extra > latte. They > were about an hou r away from anywhere with a rest > room and > in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested > she try > to hold it, which she did for a while. > Unfortunately, > because of the heavy snow and slow going, there > came a point > where she told him that he had better stop and let > her go > beside the road, or it would be the front seat of > his car. > > They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the > car, > yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow > she > didn't have good footing, so she let her butt > rest > against the rear fender t o steady herself. > Her companion stood on the side of the car > watching for traffic and indeed was a real > gentleman and > refrained from peeking. All she could think about > was the > relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing > nature of > the situation. > > Upon finishing however, she soon became > aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up > her > pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were > firmly > glued against the car's f ender. Thoughts of > tongues > frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she > attempted to > disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was > quickly > apparent that she had a brand new problem. Due to > the > extreme cold. Horrified by her plight and yet aware > of the > humor of the moment, she answered her date's > concerns about 'what is taking so long' > with a reply > that indeed, she was 'freezing her butt > off' and in > need of some assistance! > > He came around the car as she tried to cover > herself with her sweater and then, as she looked > imploringly > into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too, got > the > giggles and when they finally managed to compose > themselves, > they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical > as the > situation was, they also were faced with a real > problem. > Both agreed it would take something hot to free her > chilly > cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! > > Thinking about what had gotten her into the > predicament in the > first place, > both quickly realized that there was only one way > to get her > free. So, as she looked the other way, her first > time date > proceeded to > unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. > > As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the > Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that > should be > 'pants down'. And you thought your first > date was > embarrassing. Jay Leno's comment...'This > gives > a whole new meaning to being pissed off. 'Oh, > and how did > the first date turn out? He became her husband and > was > sitting next to her on the Leno show. > > > > > > > > Forgiveness means releasing the right to make someone > wrong.