Re: Good Thing You Can't See How Crazy I Feel

April 21, 2008

Cassandra, I am so glad you can vent here. What a horrible depression you seem

to be in. I have been there myself. I hope you find some help honey. But

anger is so natural with fibro. I get so angry and pissed sometimes that I can

make myself flare. I am half mad at the disease itself, and half of me is mad

at the lack of proof of the disease and therefore people's disbelief.

hugs,

Debra V.

Subject: Good Thing You Can't See How Crazy I Feel

To: Fibromyalgia_Support_Group

Date: Sunday, April 20, 2008, 8:20 PM

So- if your teenage kid had a bad day at school and was pissed off because they

got a

poor grade from a teacher they liked, then at lunch no-one would let them sit at

any table

so they ate the crummy lunch standing up in the hallway (secretly wishing they

hadn't

rudely rejected the bag lunch you offered up at 6.30 am)- now it's 4pm and that

special

teen-someone hasn't called, texted or e-mailed and your kid chugs 3 cans of Red

Bull and

then starts pacing up and down yelling at everyone and alternately sulking in a

big cushy

chair scrawling offensive statements and dirty words all over page after page of

a school

notebook.

Add 30+ years, change a few of the events and behaviors then : Hell-o welcome to

my

evening. I am that unruley misunderstood brat.

I wonder. What if my Drs child had cystic fibrosis but was improperly diagnosed

with

asthmatic bronchitis-- who would be saying diagnosis is less important than

symptoms

and the symptoms are psychological?

Be REALLY glad you are not in my living room now.

My partner has gone to bed, complaining that my anger is out of control and my

behavior

is manic. She offered to take me to the ER to be admitted to a psych hospital.

I'm not

100% sure but I think she was serious.

Hopefully I will drop from exhaustion at some point tonight and this particular

horror will

be over. It will be another day and if need be I will hit up the shrink

forsomething to shut

me up. They have no problem handing out those pills- it's the pills that treat

physical pain

that seem to be very very unfashionable these days. Oh piss on the rug!!!!

Cassandra

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April 21, 2008

Hi Cassandra,

I'm sorry that you had such a rough night. I guess everyone was asleep, at

least I was - luckily. I have been having a hard time falling asleep lately and

end up talking to my son while he is at work, he's a Lab Tech, on the 3 to

11 shift. I tried to go to sleep around 9pm because I had been up so early and

was really tired, but was back downstairs 45min later when I heard the phone

ring. I had so much crap going around in my head that I couldn't calm down and

so I vented to him after he vented to me. I was able to fall asleep fine then.

Getting it out does wonders for helping me relax.

Do you have a problem with mania? Are you bipolar? I remember you saying

you had DID - so do I (along with PTSD) although its basically gone now with

meds and therapy. I hope you don't have to deal with being bipolar too. Do you

ever call the doctor when you are having such a tough time? Does the doctor who

dumped you dx on you help you deal with your other problems?

I hope you are better today. I'm glad you had someone in the house with you

at least.

Take care of yourself,

Marti

wenzdai wenzdai@...> wrote:

So- if your teenage kid had a bad day at school and was pissed off

because they got a