More Grrrrrrrr, from Cassandra

[Guest guest]

Hey everyone,

I didn't get my nap after all and I am tired and sore and very foggy.

My sister called while I was trying to sleep- but who needs sleep when your lil'

sis'

calls,huh? She has what sounds like a bad sinus infection (green boogers, sore

face,

headache,sore eyes...) but no medical insurance and no money to pay cash for a

Dr. and

some Zithromax. Also she kept coughing. She is living with a young man who none

of us

in the family can comprehend, except that he has some skills in the house

building trade

and some unusual hobbies. We are all waiting it out because he is the first man

my sister

has ever been even content with- he absolutely dotes on her.

Speaking of doting. I realized I've been horribly unkind to Honey recently-

yelling at her

etc, when she is mostly very very good to me. So when she got home today I

appologized

first thing. Honey is sleeping soundly now.

I feel restless but cant focus to do any " work " : The legal documents that came

in the mail

end of last week which require our written response and return to the State

within 10 days.

I'm hoping its " business days " not " calendar " days or we may already be up

" sheets crick

without a paddle " ; can't focus to do a CNN letter today either. No focus to

help Honey

with the reading for her classes either.

I was an awesome student at University, graduated with Highest Distinction in a

double

major. Then excelled during one year of graduate school before financial

considerations

and needs of my family helped me decide that I didn't need any more paper on the

wall to

prove I can learn. I contiued to study independently but over the past few

years my

faculties seem dulled. I still feel smart and can talk a good talk but I am not

up to date on

recent publications and find I don't recall how to do some academic tasks. Or

know what

to do but feel imobilized.

This cognitive impairment that comes with the pain, do you all have it to?

That and my hair has started to fall out again.

Cassandra