Re: Re: Possiblity of repeating a grade due to maturity level?

[Guest guest]

Sandie,

Kennedy is just finishing up grade three and indeed, it was a lot more work,

but with a few modifications, she got through the academics fine. She is

also not as mature as the other girls but she is happy and happy to be with

them, etc so in our case, I wouldn't keep her back. I think it's totally up

to you and Emma - how do you think SHE feels about staying back or about not

going on with her " group " ? I think it's pretty common to be less mature for

a lot of the kids I've met with CHARGE but I'm not sure entirely that

keeping them back will " catch them up " maturity-wise. I think this is a

totally personal decision that YOU & your FAMILY make, not the school, in my

opinion.

& Kennedy

www.chargesyndrome.info

>

> Hi,

> My daughter is also 8 and entering grade 3 this fall. From what I

> understand, academically there is a leap in the amount of work the

> kids have to do and learn in grade 3. And again there are kids of

> all academic levels in a classroom. I am sure that there will be

> other kids at your daughters level in her class. I think, Sylvan

> will help your daughter by giving her a bit of a head start

> academically. This way she can maintain that mid level or improve on

> it by the time school starts.

> My daughter is also not as mature(I would put her a couple of years

> younger in maturity) as the other kids in her class. I see it, I am

> sure the other kids and her teachers see it but Amita is blissfully

> unaware of it. I try to help Amita out by talking to her about

> appropiate topics for conversation with peers and also by telling

> her teachers quite strongly to help her out in making friends and

> relating with peers. This approach may help your daughter also.

> Think about the pros and cons of holding her back. Will she feel bad

> or feel like she failed somehow or will she adapt and do well? Will

> she miss the friends she has? These are some of the questions I

> would ask myself and I would ask my daughter as well to gauge her

> response. I hope this helps you out.

> Deepta

>

>

> >

> > I know it has been a terribly long time since I have posted. But

> I do

> > check in and read the posts from time to time. I am having a very

> > difficult day today and was wondering if any of you have been

> faced

> > with this with your charge children. My daughter Emma is

> currently in

> > grade two. She has had some adaptations to her academics, but is

> doing

> > quite well. She is considered to be at about mid grade two

> level.

> > After being at the school for her IPP evalution for Grade 3 and

> being

> > told Emma's aid time will be cut next year due to school cut backs

> and

> > since she has made such remarkable improvements blah blah.

> Anyhow, I

> > spoke with her grade 2 teacher regarding Sylvan learning for Emma

> to

> > see if this would help her prepare for grade 3. She felt this

> would

> > probably be okay, but then proceeded to ask how I would feel about

> > holding Emma back due to her maturity level. She feels Emma is

> > beginning to show signs of struggling to relate with the other

> girls in

> > her class. If she was to be held back she would be placed in a

> grade

> > one/two spilt. How is this going to help her maturity level if

> she is

> > going to be with children that much younger than her. I do belive

> Emma

> > is somewhat immature for her age, but she spends alot of time in

> our

> > home environment and plays with her twin brothers who are 4. Any

> > advice on this would be greatly apprecitated.

> > TIA

> > Sandi McKerie, mom to 9, Emma 8, Twins and Clay 4 and

> wife

> > to Colin. Estevan, Saskatchewan Canada.

> >

>

>

>

--

" It is far better to grasp the universe as it really is than to persist in

delusion, however satisfying and reassuring. " --Carl Sagan

[Guest guest]

..... I feel compelled to add that was very fine not noticing the gap

between him and his peers all the way through fifth grade. In sixth grade it

wasn't clear to us it troubled him, but that's because he invested the year

trying to figure out how to be one of the group. That pain and sadness grew

through seventh and eight grade until in ninth grade was often in tears or

furious, and has recently confessed to me that at the time he thought about not

exiting anymore. I am not fearful that he actually wanted to take his life, and

I certainly understand the pain of feeling so much pain you just want it to

stop. The gap grew exponentially, and he was all aware of it at once.

Yet at the same time, one year held back would not have closed that gap - not

through the years of eight and ninth grade.

with great love,

yuka

[Guest guest]

i did year six and 11 twice

>

> .... I feel compelled to add that was very fine not noticing the

> gap between him and his peers all the way through fifth grade. In sixth

> grade it wasn't clear to us it troubled him, but that's because he invested

> the year trying to figure out how to be one of the group. That pain and

> sadness grew through seventh and eight grade until in ninth grade was

> often in tears or furious, and has recently confessed to me that at the time

> he thought about not exiting anymore. I am not fearful that he actually

> wanted to take his life, and I certainly understand the pain of feeling so

> much pain you just want it to stop. The gap grew exponentially, and he was

> all aware of it at once.

>

> Yet at the same time, one year held back would not have closed that gap -

> not through the years of eight and ninth grade.

>

> with great love,

>

> yuka

>

>

[Guest guest]

its coming accross to me like your school " cant be bothered " so they want to

keep her back

Like others have said, many kids have varied levels of maturity and

development throughout school, and holding them back won't necessarily hold

them back.

I started school at 4 years, ive always been one of the youngest. I remember

my mum had thought about holding me back in grade six but i was strongly

against it.

In the start of high school (years 7,8 and 9) is when i noticed the maturity

levels thing alot. Iknow i was more immature then my peers then......but im

not sure staying back a year would of helped at all anyway...

[Guest guest]

Hi Ellen,

And how did you feel about it at the time??

Can you remember if it bothered you?

I am thinking about geting to stay at PreSchol for an extra year.....

is

>

> i did year six and 11 twice

>

>

> >

> > .... I feel compelled to add that was very fine not noticing the

> > gap between him and his peers all the way through fifth grade. In sixth

> > grade it wasn't clear to us it troubled him, but that's because he

> invested

> > the year trying to figure out how to be one of the group. That pain and

> > sadness grew through seventh and eight grade until in ninth grade

> was

> > often in tears or furious, and has recently confessed to me that at the

> time

> > he thought about not exiting anymore. I am not fearful that he actually

> > wanted to take his life, and I certainly understand the pain of feeling

> so

> > much pain you just want it to stop. The gap grew exponentially, and he

> was

> > all aware of it at once.

> >

> > Yet at the same time, one year held back would not have closed that gap

> -

> > not through the years of eight and ninth grade.

> >

> > with great love,

> >

> > yuka

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Ellen.....You got kept down more though because you were in hospital so much

didnt you?

>

> Hi Ellen,

>

> And how did you feel about it at the time??

> Can you remember if it bothered you?

> I am thinking about geting to stay at PreSchol for an extra

> year.....

>

> is

>

> On 6/8/07, ellen howe ellen.howe@... >

> wrote:

> >

> > i did year six and 11 twice

> >

> > On 08/06/07, Yuka Persico yuka@...

> wrote:

> > >

> > > .... I feel compelled to add that was very fine not noticing the

> > > gap between him and his peers all the way through fifth grade. In

> sixth

> > > grade it wasn't clear to us it troubled him, but that's because he

> > invested

> > > the year trying to figure out how to be one of the group. That pain

> and

> > > sadness grew through seventh and eight grade until in ninth grade

>

> > was

> > > often in tears or furious, and has recently confessed to me that at

> the

> > time

> > > he thought about not exiting anymore. I am not fearful that he

> actually

> > > wanted to take his life, and I certainly understand the pain of

> feeling

> > so

> > > much pain you just want it to stop. The gap grew exponentially, and he

> > was

> > > all aware of it at once.

> > >

> > > Yet at the same time, one year held back would not have closed that

> gap

> > -

> > > not through the years of eight and ninth grade.

> > >

> > > with great love,

> > >

> > > yuka

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

tim did pre-k for 3 yrs. his b-day is aug 15, and he needed that year.

maria

Re: Re: Possiblity of repeating a grade due to maturity

level?

Hi Ellen,

And how did you feel about it at the time??

Can you remember if it bothered you?

I am thinking about geting to stay at PreSchol for an extra year.....

is

>

> i did year six and 11 twice

>

>

> >

> > .... I feel compelled to add that was very fine not noticing the

> > gap between him and his peers all the way through fifth grade. In sixth

> > grade it wasn't clear to us it troubled him, but that's because he

> invested

> > the year trying to figure out how to be one of the group. That pain and

> > sadness grew through seventh and eight grade until in ninth grade

> was

> > often in tears or furious, and has recently confessed to me that at the

> time

> > he thought about not exiting anymore. I am not fearful that he actually

> > wanted to take his life, and I certainly understand the pain of feeling

> so

> > much pain you just want it to stop. The gap grew exponentially, and he

> was

> > all aware of it at once.

> >

> > Yet at the same time, one year held back would not have closed that gap

> -

> > not through the years of eight and ninth grade.

> >

> > with great love,

> >

> > yuka

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

tim did pre-k for 3 yrs. his b-day is aug 15, and he needed that year.

maria

Re: Re: Possiblity of repeating a grade due to maturity

level?

Hi Ellen,

And how did you feel about it at the time??

Can you remember if it bothered you?

I am thinking about geting to stay at PreSchol for an extra year.....

is

>

> i did year six and 11 twice

>

>

> >

> > .... I feel compelled to add that was very fine not noticing the

> > gap between him and his peers all the way through fifth grade. In sixth

> > grade it wasn't clear to us it troubled him, but that's because he

> invested

> > the year trying to figure out how to be one of the group. That pain and

> > sadness grew through seventh and eight grade until in ninth grade

> was

> > often in tears or furious, and has recently confessed to me that at the

> time

> > he thought about not exiting anymore. I am not fearful that he actually

> > wanted to take his life, and I certainly understand the pain of feeling

> so

> > much pain you just want it to stop. The gap grew exponentially, and he

> was

> > all aware of it at once.

> >

> > Yet at the same time, one year held back would not have closed that gap

> -

> > not through the years of eight and ninth grade.

> >

> > with great love,

> >

> > yuka

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

there is a big jump from 2nd to third even my typical A student had

troubles--not major, but adjustments to make. he did well and after the first

marking period was back on track, but he learned it was more work and he

actually had to study.

maria

Re: Possiblity of repeating a grade due to maturity level?

Hi,

My daughter is also 8 and entering grade 3 this fall. From what I

understand, academically there is a leap in the amount of work the

kids have to do and learn in grade 3. And again there are kids of

all academic levels in a classroom. I am sure that there will be

other kids at your daughters level in her class. I think, Sylvan

will help your daughter by giving her a bit of a head start

academically. This way she can maintain that mid level or improve on

it by the time school starts.

My daughter is also not as mature(I would put her a couple of years

younger in maturity) as the other kids in her class. I see it, I am

sure the other kids and her teachers see it but Amita is blissfully

unaware of it. I try to help Amita out by talking to her about

appropiate topics for conversation with peers and also by telling

her teachers quite strongly to help her out in making friends and

relating with peers. This approach may help your daughter also.

Think about the pros and cons of holding her back. Will she feel bad

or feel like she failed somehow or will she adapt and do well? Will

she miss the friends she has? These are some of the questions I

would ask myself and I would ask my daughter as well to gauge her

response. I hope this helps you out.

Deepta

>

> I know it has been a terribly long time since I have posted. But

I do

> check in and read the posts from time to time. I am having a very

> difficult day today and was wondering if any of you have been

faced

> with this with your charge children. My daughter Emma is

currently in

> grade two. She has had some adaptations to her academics, but is

doing

> quite well. She is considered to be at about mid grade two

level.

> After being at the school for her IPP evalution for Grade 3 and

being

> told Emma's aid time will be cut next year due to school cut backs

and

> since she has made such remarkable improvements blah blah.

Anyhow, I

> spoke with her grade 2 teacher regarding Sylvan learning for Emma

to

> see if this would help her prepare for grade 3. She felt this

would

> probably be okay, but then proceeded to ask how I would feel about

> holding Emma back due to her maturity level. She feels Emma is

> beginning to show signs of struggling to relate with the other

girls in

> her class. If she was to be held back she would be placed in a

grade

> one/two spilt. How is this going to help her maturity level if

she is

> going to be with children that much younger than her. I do belive

Emma

> is somewhat immature for her age, but she spends alot of time in

our

> home environment and plays with her twin brothers who are 4. Any

> advice on this would be greatly apprecitated.

> TIA

> Sandi McKerie, mom to 9, Emma 8, Twins and Clay 4 and

wife

> to Colin. Estevan, Saskatchewan Canada.

>

[Guest guest]

there is a big jump from 2nd to third even my typical A student had

troubles--not major, but adjustments to make. he did well and after the first

marking period was back on track, but he learned it was more work and he

actually had to study.

maria

Re: Possiblity of repeating a grade due to maturity level?

Hi,

My daughter is also 8 and entering grade 3 this fall. From what I

understand, academically there is a leap in the amount of work the

kids have to do and learn in grade 3. And again there are kids of

all academic levels in a classroom. I am sure that there will be

other kids at your daughters level in her class. I think, Sylvan

will help your daughter by giving her a bit of a head start

academically. This way she can maintain that mid level or improve on

it by the time school starts.

My daughter is also not as mature(I would put her a couple of years

younger in maturity) as the other kids in her class. I see it, I am

sure the other kids and her teachers see it but Amita is blissfully

unaware of it. I try to help Amita out by talking to her about

appropiate topics for conversation with peers and also by telling

her teachers quite strongly to help her out in making friends and

relating with peers. This approach may help your daughter also.

Think about the pros and cons of holding her back. Will she feel bad

or feel like she failed somehow or will she adapt and do well? Will

she miss the friends she has? These are some of the questions I

would ask myself and I would ask my daughter as well to gauge her

response. I hope this helps you out.

Deepta

>

> I know it has been a terribly long time since I have posted. But

I do

> check in and read the posts from time to time. I am having a very

> difficult day today and was wondering if any of you have been

faced

> with this with your charge children. My daughter Emma is

currently in

> grade two. She has had some adaptations to her academics, but is

doing

> quite well. She is considered to be at about mid grade two

level.

> After being at the school for her IPP evalution for Grade 3 and

being

> told Emma's aid time will be cut next year due to school cut backs

and

> since she has made such remarkable improvements blah blah.

Anyhow, I

> spoke with her grade 2 teacher regarding Sylvan learning for Emma

to

> see if this would help her prepare for grade 3. She felt this

would

> probably be okay, but then proceeded to ask how I would feel about

> holding Emma back due to her maturity level. She feels Emma is

> beginning to show signs of struggling to relate with the other

girls in

> her class. If she was to be held back she would be placed in a

grade

> one/two spilt. How is this going to help her maturity level if

she is

> going to be with children that much younger than her. I do belive

Emma

> is somewhat immature for her age, but she spends alot of time in

our

> home environment and plays with her twin brothers who are 4. Any

> advice on this would be greatly apprecitated.

> TIA

> Sandi McKerie, mom to 9, Emma 8, Twins and Clay 4 and

wife

> to Colin. Estevan, Saskatchewan Canada.

>

[Guest guest]

alexis i didnt mind coz i was in hosp so much it did help me to cathc up on

the work my drs even made sure the teachers did it to lol they had to wtrite

why they thought was good to do hsc over to years though my head teacher at

the time said well do it but its up to higher hands thankfuly higher hands

let her lol

>

> Sandi-

>

> A good resource might be Tim's article on the glossary of charge

> behaviors.

> I was sure I'd saved it, but cannot locate it now. I've cc'd Simon on this

> because it was an article in his newsletter once upon a time - and Tim

> since

> he is the author. Maybe one of them can send it to us. I'd like it for my

> files and I think you'd find it helpful. It lists all the different

> behavior issues/categories that can impact our kids. I was shocked to see

> how many areas are affected for Aubrie. When her team members saw it, they

> became more aware of the subtle challenges she faces. All of them impact

> social relationships.

>

> Michele W

> Aubrie's mom 9 yrs

>

> _____

>

> From: CHARGE [mailto:

> CHARGE ] On Behalf Of

> smck43

> Sent: Friday, June 08, 2007 8:50 AM

> To: CHARGE

> Subject: Re: Possiblity of repeating a grade due to maturity

> level?

>

> First off I would like to say thank you all for your responses to my

> email. I had a terribly emotional day yesterday and I know many of

> you have probably all been there. Do we ever get over the feeling of

> what did I do wrong for this to be happening to my child. I know God

> gave me my little girl for this very reason, and for such a time as

> this! It is my faith that sees me through these difficult situations

> and knowing that this group it here for so much support. God Bless

> you all.

>

> I do believe with that it is not about lack of maturity ~

> its about neurological and sensory differences. I am going to

> research this more and present this to the teacher and special ed

> teacher. I know that holding Emma back would be absoulutely

> devastating to her at this point. She has made strong friendships

> with 4 girls in her class and I know she is noticing differences

> already but she is trying so hard to keep up. Again thanks for all

> your advice and I will keep you all posted as to what the outcome

> will look like for Emma for grade 3.

>

> Hugs to you all,

> Sandi, mom to 9 Emma 8, twins and Clay 4 wife to Colin.

>

>

> >

> > Sandi-

> >

> > Too bad you're not in the US because funding is not a valid reason

> to cut an

> > aide if it's necessary for the child's educational progress.

> >

> >

> >

> > My gut response to the question about holding her back due to social

> > immaturity is that our kids typically have social delays well into

> adulthood

> > so holding back will do nothing to help it. It's not about lack of

> maturity

> > as typical kids may have. It's about neurological and sensory

> differences

> > that make social and emotional development more challenging.

> >

> >

> >

> > My daughter, Aubrie, just completed 3rd grade (age 9.5 yrs). The

> gap

> > between her and her peers grows each year. The best support for

> that has

> > been weekly visits with the social worker at school to help her

> understand

> > and manage social and emotional situations better and more quickly

> than she

> > might without any support.

> >

> >

> >

> > Aubrie is also doing fairly well academically (with appropriate

> > accommodations). Her biggest challenges are math and spelling, but

> she is

> > holding her own so far.

> >

> >

> >

> > Good luck.

> >

> >

> >

> > Michele W

> > Aubrie's mom 9 yrs

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

alexis i didnt mind coz i was in hosp so much it did help me to cathc up on

the work my drs even made sure the teachers did it to lol they had to wtrite

why they thought was good to do hsc over to years though my head teacher at

the time said well do it but its up to higher hands thankfuly higher hands

let her lol

>

> Sandi-

>

> A good resource might be Tim's article on the glossary of charge

> behaviors.

> I was sure I'd saved it, but cannot locate it now. I've cc'd Simon on this

> because it was an article in his newsletter once upon a time - and Tim

> since

> he is the author. Maybe one of them can send it to us. I'd like it for my

> files and I think you'd find it helpful. It lists all the different

> behavior issues/categories that can impact our kids. I was shocked to see

> how many areas are affected for Aubrie. When her team members saw it, they

> became more aware of the subtle challenges she faces. All of them impact

> social relationships.

>

> Michele W

> Aubrie's mom 9 yrs

>

> _____

>

> From: CHARGE [mailto:

> CHARGE ] On Behalf Of

> smck43

> Sent: Friday, June 08, 2007 8:50 AM

> To: CHARGE

> Subject: Re: Possiblity of repeating a grade due to maturity

> level?

>

> First off I would like to say thank you all for your responses to my

> email. I had a terribly emotional day yesterday and I know many of

> you have probably all been there. Do we ever get over the feeling of

> what did I do wrong for this to be happening to my child. I know God

> gave me my little girl for this very reason, and for such a time as

> this! It is my faith that sees me through these difficult situations

> and knowing that this group it here for so much support. God Bless

> you all.

>

> I do believe with that it is not about lack of maturity ~

> its about neurological and sensory differences. I am going to

> research this more and present this to the teacher and special ed

> teacher. I know that holding Emma back would be absoulutely

> devastating to her at this point. She has made strong friendships

> with 4 girls in her class and I know she is noticing differences

> already but she is trying so hard to keep up. Again thanks for all

> your advice and I will keep you all posted as to what the outcome

> will look like for Emma for grade 3.

>

> Hugs to you all,

> Sandi, mom to 9 Emma 8, twins and Clay 4 wife to Colin.

>

>

> >

> > Sandi-

> >

> > Too bad you're not in the US because funding is not a valid reason

> to cut an

> > aide if it's necessary for the child's educational progress.

> >

> >

> >

> > My gut response to the question about holding her back due to social

> > immaturity is that our kids typically have social delays well into

> adulthood

> > so holding back will do nothing to help it. It's not about lack of

> maturity

> > as typical kids may have. It's about neurological and sensory

> differences

> > that make social and emotional development more challenging.

> >

> >

> >

> > My daughter, Aubrie, just completed 3rd grade (age 9.5 yrs). The

> gap

> > between her and her peers grows each year. The best support for

> that has

> > been weekly visits with the social worker at school to help her

> understand

> > and manage social and emotional situations better and more quickly

> than she

> > might without any support.

> >

> >

> >

> > Aubrie is also doing fairly well academically (with appropriate

> > accommodations). Her biggest challenges are math and spelling, but

> she is

> > holding her own so far.

> >

> >

> >

> > Good luck.

> >

> >

> >

> > Michele W

> > Aubrie's mom 9 yrs

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

alexis i didnt mind coz i was in hosp so much it did help me to cathc up on

the work my drs even made sure the teachers did it to lol they had to wtrite

why they thought was good to do hsc over to years though my head teacher at

the time said well do it but its up to higher hands thankfuly higher hands

let her lol

>

> Sandi-

>

> A good resource might be Tim's article on the glossary of charge

> behaviors.

> I was sure I'd saved it, but cannot locate it now. I've cc'd Simon on this

> because it was an article in his newsletter once upon a time - and Tim

> since

> he is the author. Maybe one of them can send it to us. I'd like it for my

> files and I think you'd find it helpful. It lists all the different

> behavior issues/categories that can impact our kids. I was shocked to see

> how many areas are affected for Aubrie. When her team members saw it, they

> became more aware of the subtle challenges she faces. All of them impact

> social relationships.

>

> Michele W

> Aubrie's mom 9 yrs

>

> _____

>

> From: CHARGE [mailto:

> CHARGE ] On Behalf Of

> smck43

> Sent: Friday, June 08, 2007 8:50 AM

> To: CHARGE

> Subject: Re: Possiblity of repeating a grade due to maturity

> level?

>

> First off I would like to say thank you all for your responses to my

> email. I had a terribly emotional day yesterday and I know many of

> you have probably all been there. Do we ever get over the feeling of

> what did I do wrong for this to be happening to my child. I know God

> gave me my little girl for this very reason, and for such a time as

> this! It is my faith that sees me through these difficult situations

> and knowing that this group it here for so much support. God Bless

> you all.

>

> I do believe with that it is not about lack of maturity ~

> its about neurological and sensory differences. I am going to

> research this more and present this to the teacher and special ed

> teacher. I know that holding Emma back would be absoulutely

> devastating to her at this point. She has made strong friendships

> with 4 girls in her class and I know she is noticing differences

> already but she is trying so hard to keep up. Again thanks for all

> your advice and I will keep you all posted as to what the outcome

> will look like for Emma for grade 3.

>

> Hugs to you all,

> Sandi, mom to 9 Emma 8, twins and Clay 4 wife to Colin.

>

>

> >

> > Sandi-

> >

> > Too bad you're not in the US because funding is not a valid reason

> to cut an

> > aide if it's necessary for the child's educational progress.

> >

> >

> >

> > My gut response to the question about holding her back due to social

> > immaturity is that our kids typically have social delays well into

> adulthood

> > so holding back will do nothing to help it. It's not about lack of

> maturity

> > as typical kids may have. It's about neurological and sensory

> differences

> > that make social and emotional development more challenging.

> >

> >

> >

> > My daughter, Aubrie, just completed 3rd grade (age 9.5 yrs). The

> gap

> > between her and her peers grows each year. The best support for

> that has

> > been weekly visits with the social worker at school to help her

> understand

> > and manage social and emotional situations better and more quickly

> than she

> > might without any support.

> >

> >

> >

> > Aubrie is also doing fairly well academically (with appropriate

> > accommodations). Her biggest challenges are math and spelling, but

> she is

> > holding her own so far.

> >

> >

> >

> > Good luck.

> >

> >

> >

> > Michele W

> > Aubrie's mom 9 yrs

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >