Janay Re: Re: Rasha's MRI results-Not good...

[Guest guest]

Yuka,

You make a very important distinction in the uses of the word hope.

When looking to the future ready to see what it brings-this is hope

for me. When looking at the present with the desire that it changes

is something else. To borrow something a wise individual pointed out

to me (), acceptance plays a key role here. I have many things

to think about and enjoy as I grow from this. Redefining terms like

these and sorting through the " junk " Michele and I were talking

about has opened some new doors for me.

Thanks to all for your support!

Janay

> >

> > Janay-

> >

> > I think the sorrow and grief you felt is completely natural.

It

> is a Buddhist tenet that attachment is the source of suffering.

I

> have found this to be true for me. In similar situations of

> diagnosis with I have discovered I had attachments to or

> expectations of certain outcomes, especially when the outcomes

did

> not match my expectations. I do feel though that my grief was

for

> the expectation that was unmet, for the attachment to something

that

> never really was. I did not grieve for me or my child. For

truly,

> my child was the same wholeness before the diagnosis as after,

as

> was I, as were we.

> >

> > I know it is not that one cannot see the good in other

outcomes.

> It is that one must give oneself the care and time to grieve

> specifically the outcome that was denied at that moment.

> > To be cleared, the grief and suffering must be allowed to be

fully

> experienced (I have had many an unexpressed grief well up at a

later

> date).

> >

> > Does that make any sense?

> >

> > I think you are doing beautifully ~

> >

> > in love,

> >

> > Yuka

> >

> >