Re: Greeting cards you'll never find in a Hallmark store - GINA

[Guest guest]

, thanks so much for the good laugh. I really needed that today!

Hugs,

Joan

Matsumura wrote:

>

> Subject: Greeting cards you'll never find in a Hallmark store

>

> I must admit, you brought religion in my life . . . I never believed in hell

> 'til I met you.

>

> I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love . . . after

> meeting you, I've changed my mind.

>

> Congratulations on your Wedding Day! . . . Too bad no one likes your wife

> (or husband, depending on gender. Could be both).

>

> How could two people as beautiful you . . . have such an ugly baby?

>

> I've always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love . . . after

> meeting you, I've changed my mind.

>

> Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but

> wonder . . . WHAT was I THINKING?

>

> As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am . . . that you're not here to

> ruin it for me.

>

> If I get only one thing for Christmas . . . I hope it's your brother

> (sister).

>

> As you grow older, Mom, I think of all the gifts you've given me . . . like

> the need for therapy.

>

> Thanks for being a part of my life!!! . . . I never knew what evil was

> before now!

>

> Congratulations on your promotion! Before you go . . . would you take this

> knife out of my back?You'll probably need it again.

>

> Someday I hope to get married . . . but not to you.

>

> Happy Birthday! You look great for your age . . . almost LIFELIKE!

>

> When we were together, you always said you'd die for me . . . Now that we've

> broken up, I think it's time you kept your promise.

>

> I knew the day would come when you would leave me for my best friend . . .

> so here's his leash, water bowl, and chew toys.

>

> We have been friends for a very long time . . . what do you say we call it

> quits?

>

> I'm so miserable without you . . . it's almost like you're here.

>

> Congratulations on your new bundle of joy! . . . Did you ever find out who

> the father is?

>

> You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship and there were

> only one life jacket . . . I'd miss you heaps and think of you often.

>

> Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday . . . so

> we're having you put to sleep.

>

> Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!! (available only in Arkansas, Kentucky &

> Tennessee)