Re: [dad

[Guest guest]

Kathy,

For his safety, it sounds like you need to " child-proof " the house right

away. We had to do this for my mother in law. Hide keys or he might try to

drive or wander away (my mother in law did), put medicine away, hide scissors

(she tried to cut her hair and almost put her eyes out), move knives, cover

outlets--she tried to put a knife in one, etc. etc. You have kids--I'm sure

you know the routine, but remember he's taller than a child. My mother in

law put dish soap (Joy) in the dishwasher and they had a soapy flooded floor

that was really dangerous. She burnt her hands in hot water (she forgot

which was the cold). She tried to do the laundry and forgot to put in soap

(not too bad, but the clothes wouldn't have been clean). I can go on and

on. One day she didn't recognize my father in law and panicked and started

running and throwing things (drinking glasses, canisters, glass figurines,

etc.). She knocked him over and his sister who was visiting. I'm afraid

that at that point he realized it was beyond his ability to keep her home,

happy and safe and the nursing home decision was really made for him.

If money for a home is an issue, I can tell you about medicaid. They are

very generous when there is a surviving spouse. We got no coverage for the

24-hour aides despite trying.

It sounds as if you need to assess the situation. Its so difficult with

children. You must feel very torn. Is there a friend near your parents who

could report to you or provide them some assistance, in your place? Let me

know what other information you need.

Vicki

[Guest guest]

BETTY Well the tremors and seizures are back and he and mom hasn't slept

for 48 hours now. He is constantly moving. He isn't compalining of any

pain, but the tremors and seizures are really bothering him. He fell

again this week. I am afraid that his legs must be getting weaker. He

undid the VCR and Cable on the living room TV to hook the VCR to his TV,

but he forgot how to hook it back up. He is beginning to aurgue with mom

a little too. He tried to play solitare on the computer and forgot how

to do that too. Mom is just exhausted. has been there a lot this

week and Vicki has left to go home tonight. I am going to try to go home

this weekend too. I wish I didn't have to work, because I would just go

take care of him. But I have to feed my kids! But it sounds like we are

beginning that downhill slope into a land of dementia and horror. I have

a call into theneurologist. I want to give him something strong to knock

his bottom out at night. Today he got into his pills and took an ativan.

He thought he was taking an aspirin for his ribs. Did I tell you he was

trying to carry mom computer monitor when he fell? I swear this man is

going to either hurt himself or tear up everything mom has (and not mean

to). Well I just wanted to update you and let you know we are still

here, but it is beginning to get worse. Take care and thanks for

listening.

God Bless You

Kathy

ICQ 2551093

[Guest guest]

Hi Kathy;

Bless your sweet heart. I do wish there was someway to make things

better. But I;ve been there and done that and I did not find any way

out.

My husband had many of those, what the doctor called " episodes " . While

he was in teh hospital, he was haviung hallucinations and thought

" Terroist " had kidnapped me and I could not find him. He then proceeded

to get up and walk out into the hall quite a way from his room. This is

the strnge thing...he couold not walk at all without help and that was

only to sit him down in his wheelchair. I questioned this and was told

thar his brain did not send him that message,so he gets up and walks.

Weird huh?

And yes he went through the insomnia. He was given " sleeping pills " for

this. He could probably have eaten a jelly bean and accomplished as

much. No matter what they gave him nothing worked. When he was able to

tell me, he said that his eyes did ot want to close. I thought of that

when he was comatose. His eyes remained open for days and became so

dry. We put drops in them.

He asked me why he could not remember how to do the things that had

always been more or less routine.

His tremors (jerking) was so bad he couold not hold a fork or spoon to

feed himself. He threw a fork at me once, which embarassed him. But he

could not control the jerking. Eventually he kept his hands in his lap

trying to hold themstill

Even while he was in the coma his arms would sling around and his feet

would kick constantly.

And yes when they are like that you ave to treat them like a child.

They are just not the same person they once were.

I know you must be weary of all that is going on. Just remember me are

all here, just to listen if that is what you want and need. I think you

have many private e-mails so if there are things that you feel that you

may not want to share with just everybody. feel free to use them.

Even though you may not feel that way just now....YOU WILL MAKE IT. You

are an overcomer through God. he said he would go through ther storm

with you. So you know by that YOU WILL come out the other side of the

storm.

Rest is on the way...

..

Love You.

Betty

[Guest guest]

Kathy,

I am so sorry to hear your dad is failing like this. It sure does

bring some memories. It sounds as though you have a handle on what to

expect, but it sure doesn't make it easier to deal with. Just know that

all of us are here to listen, to pray, to feel, and to love, in any way

we can to make this nightmare a little easier. May God bless you and

your family.

Annette