Guest guest Posted October 29, 1998 Report Share Posted October 29, 1998 Here's some food for thought. In some private emails with a member of this group, the other person made the observation that he used to complain when he couldn't sleep at all, but now he's upset when he misses a few hours. He commented on how surprising it is that our tolerance levels change. He also mentioned that he used to have to MAKE himself go to bed at 2a.m...but now he gets tired at midnight. Here's the food for thought. Our tolerance levels DO change, but our frustrations and feelings remain just as intense as ever...even though our situation may be improved. I learned this many years ago, in a support group for child abuse. When people came to the group, they were often at their lowest...experiencing daily temper fits and abuse of their kids. As with many support groups, just being there and learning and getting support, was enough to immediately stop the abuse and severe anger. But then, in a month or so, they'd have another bad fit of it and beat the kids again...or maybe just yell at them. This was always followed by disappointment, because they thought they were right back where they started from. What we learned, is that this " new " episode of abuse/anger, was really NOT nearly as bad as before. But the intensity of the feelings were just as bad. When you FEEL anger, panic, or frustration, you feel it just as intensely as you ever have. But what you DO about it, or what causes is, may not be nearly as bad as it used to be. Okay...back to RLS. In a nutshell...(yea, I know...that's an oxymoron for me, isn't it?): I am more frustrated and angry about my current RLS attacks than ever before. I used to just deal with them and accept them as my own private thing that no one else understood. NOW, they really disappoint me and make me made, because I really want to get rid of them or respond to them better, now that I know there are possibilities. So, I may be more frustrated, and filled with more feelings of frustration and hopelessness than before...but if I look at the big picture....I'm really dealing with it better than I have in 40 years, the episodes are NOT as bad as they were becoming a year ago, and I am definitely responding better to them. I just thought some of you might want to do a little self evaluation, like this other person did (the one I mentioned in the beginning of this letter)..and determine whether you are doing better or worse than ever before. You may find your frustration is as great...but your situation is really pretty positive. It's all relative to where we've been, where we are, and where we need to go. I KNOW, from many of the letters to the group, that many of us have already done this. I hear it when I hear the satisfaction with certain meds, or using heel lifts religiously, or figuring out better sleep environments, etc. But I'm sure a lot of these folks will also agree, that even though things are better, they sometimes are more frustrated and depressed over it all than ever before. And so...life goes on. Have a good day, Jill, 46 Payson, AZ http://www.netzone.com/~gunzel/rls.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 29, 1998 Report Share Posted October 29, 1998 Hi Einstein it is not all relative, a great deal is, but I think there are also absolute factors. Since I use meds, about a year now, I sleep an average of 4 to 5 hrs a night. Before that I slept less. I still experience it as a bless if and when I sleep half a night. On the other hand,24 yrs ago I had the same weight as today, I found myself FAT and overweight.I came from less. Now I come from obesitas and I think I am a featherweight(?).I even decided to run this morning.You can guess, I move like an old woman now,and feel overweight again. Marleen,light as a stone Jill Gunzel wrote: > > > Here's some food for thought. > > In some private emails with a member of this group, the other person made > the observation that he used to complain when he couldn't sleep at all, but > now he's upset when he misses a few hours. He commented on how surprising > it is that our tolerance levels change. > > He also mentioned that he used to have to MAKE himself go to bed at > 2a.m...but now he gets tired at midnight. > > Here's the food for thought. Our tolerance levels DO change, but our > frustrations and feelings remain just as intense as ever...even though our > situation may be improved. > > I learned this many years ago, in a support group for child abuse. When > people came to the group, they were often at their lowest...experiencing > daily temper fits and abuse of their kids. As with many support groups, > just being there and learning and getting support, was enough to > immediately stop the abuse and severe anger. But then, in a month or so, > they'd have another bad fit of it and beat the kids again...or maybe just > yell at them. This was always followed by disappointment, because they > thought they were right back where they started from. What we learned, is > that this " new " episode of abuse/anger, was really NOT nearly as bad as > before. But the intensity of the feelings were just as bad. When you FEEL > anger, panic, or frustration, you feel it just as intensely as you ever > have. But what you DO about it, or what causes is, may not be nearly as > bad as it used to be. > > Okay...back to RLS. In a nutshell...(yea, I know...that's an oxymoron for > me, isn't it?): I am more frustrated and angry about my current RLS > attacks than ever before. I used to just deal with them and accept them as > my own private thing that no one else understood. NOW, they really > disappoint me and make me made, because I really want to get rid of them or > respond to them better, now that I know there are possibilities. So, I may > be more frustrated, and filled with more feelings of frustration and > hopelessness than before...but if I look at the big picture....I'm really > dealing with it better than I have in 40 years, the episodes are NOT as bad > as they were becoming a year ago, and I am definitely responding better to > them. > > I just thought some of you might want to do a little self evaluation, like > this other person did (the one I mentioned in the beginning of this > letter)..and determine whether you are doing better or worse than ever > before. You may find your frustration is as great...but your situation is > really pretty positive. It's all relative to where we've been, where we > are, and where we need to go. > > I KNOW, from many of the letters to the group, that many of us have already > done this. I hear it when I hear the satisfaction with certain meds, or > using heel lifts religiously, or figuring out better sleep environments, > etc. But I'm sure a lot of these folks will also agree, that even though > things are better, they sometimes are more frustrated and depressed over it > all than ever before. And so...life goes on. > Have a good day, > > Jill, 46 > Payson, AZ > http://www.netzone.com/~gunzel/rls.html > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 29, 1998 Report Share Posted October 29, 1998 In a message dated 98-10-29 12:47:29 EST, you write: << I am more frustrated and angry about my current RLS attacks than ever before. I used to just deal with them and accept them as my own private thing that no one else understood. NOW, they really disappoint me and make me made, because I really want to get rid of them or respond to them better, now that I know there are possibilities. >> After a really good restful night of sleep in the sleep lab for the first time in my life after 40 years of suffering, I was hooked! It is easy to get addicted to " normal " sleep, if you know what I mean. I, too, am more frustrated and angry about my RLS and I am much more irritated and intolerant when I don't get the sleep that I think I deserve. In the past, I accepted it as life and dealt with it the best I could. NOW, I know better and NOW I realize what life, i.e. sleep, is suppose to be like. I want sleep! I went relief! , 43, home of the Rhino bullet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 29, 1998 Report Share Posted October 29, 1998 > After a really good restful night of sleep in the sleep lab for the first time > in my life after 40 years of suffering, I was hooked! > It is easy to get addicted to " normal " sleep, if you know what I mean. This reminds me of the " logic " I used with my doctor when we were discussing his reluctance to prescribe opioids because of the addiction potential. At the time I hadn't slept for who knows how long and I said something like-- " Well normal people are addicted to sleep, so what's the big deal. " This actually made some sense to him and he wrote me the script. --, 52 in beautiful Western NY State. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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