New member with an attitude

[Guest guest]

Greetings everyone,

I have Restless Leg

Syndrome. I have had it for most of my life and have experienced all of the

frustration and anguish that most of you have.

I have decided that before I enter into conversation with this group about my

problem, I would like to address your group dynamics. I have spent the past

few days reading through your archives and catching up on who is who and what

is what within this group. In my professional life, I deal in communicating.

I certainly would not be so gauche as to come in here as a new member and

criticize how your group operates, but you know, sometimes a stranger can

take a fresh look at things and see the picture a lot clearer than those who

have been involved all along. From what I see, people pretty much say and do

what they want in this group, so I think I will do the same and express just

a thought or two about things that occurred to me during my reading. If I am

still welcome as a member after that, I shall look forward to getting to know

you better.

First and foremost, if I were your group leader I would just sit back and let

the group run itself. You are all adults and can take care of yourselves.

You do not need her to protect you, and she certainly does not need any more

adversity in her life. This last flare-up particularly, is such a picayune

thing, certainly hardly worth her entering into.

If I may express my honest opinion here, it appears that you have already

gotten rid of the greatest troublemakers in your group, and you have lost,

I'm afraid, your greatest asset. I am speaking of Dr. Levin, of course.

This man was a physician and pharmacist and is old enough to retire. You

were extremely fortunate to have access to all of his experience. The fact

that he had RLS and was so unbelievably devoted to this group, day and night,

sweetened the pot even further. I regret not making his acquaintance. Life

goes on.

I'm certainly not going to sit here and pick your group apart. I am not a

perfect person and I do not claim to possess any knowledge greater than what

you all have. But at the same time, I may be a bit more outspoken than most,

and I feel it is very important to be fair and honest. I sincerely hope that

my observations will not offend the group as a whole.

This latest altercation is actually funny, in my estimation. We have ,

your group " Bad Boy " , a self-imposed title. Somehow I feel his behavior

hides a heart of gold and a lot of pain. I suppose I could be wrong.

And then there is " Coco " .

This person's letters tell me

more about her than I really want to know. Every group needs a Coco. She's

a catalyst, if you know what I mean. I think she also has a good heart and

would love to be helpful to the group. The trouble is that she is too

arrogant for group encounters. She reminds me of Carla on Cheers. The first

person she attacked was Connie, your group " Mom " (!), and from there on, she

has made it evident that she will attack anyone. But it seems she prefers

. Seems to me they are a good match. She makes no bones about the

fact that she does NOT care what you think and she is going to do whatever

she wants to, whether you like it or not. She will ignore all suggestions

for communicating in a better way. She is an alternative medicine junkie who

appears to try anything and everything, a zealot, whose life revolves around

the word " natural " , which happens to be the biggest joke in the Universe at

this point in time. Actually, just about everything there is was natural at

some point. What I find most offensive about Coco is her " in your face "

tone, which never, ever, EVER makes for good communication. She needs to

learn to care about people's feelings and allow them the same priveleges that

she allows herself. I would love to see her make this change, because it is

people like this, ( and you have a few more that seem to be leaning in this

direction ) that disrupt the flow of smooth and constructive communication.

I am not suggesting she leave this group That would be extremely arrogant of

ME!. I feel she really wants and needs to be helpful in some way to

someone, and I'm certain that she is. She also makes things interesting. I

expect I will be hearing from Coco before too long, but fear not, for I am

also a match for her.

I would also like to express my appreciation to the person who wrote the

delightful poem " Ode To Restless Leg Syndrome " . I am not familiar with all

of the people she mentioned, but she certainly has her facts straight and

possesses a great sense of humor! I have printed this out and mounted it

above my computer for when I need a guaranteed smile.

I will withdraw into the background now and lurk for a while, content to have

found a place where I finally feel that I " belong " . Thank you all for

indulging me. I promise to be less opinionated in the future.

" Morticia "

[Guest guest]

Finally Coco and closed their case and moved on, why stirring this up

again,

and show your favor? " Morticia " ?If you are educated in communication, can't you

recognize when it would be wise to leave it? Marleen, 53, Holland

Vezzoso639@... wrote:

> From: Vezzoso639@...

>

> Greetings everyone,

>

> I have Restless Leg

> Syndrome. I have had it for most of my life and have experienced all of the

> frustration and anguish that most of you have.

>

> I have decided that before I enter into conversation with this group about my

> problem, I would like to address your group dynamics. I have spent the past

> few days reading through your archives and catching up on who is who and what

> is what within this group. In my professional life, I deal in communicating.

> I certainly would not be so gauche as to come in here as a new member and

> criticize how your group operates, but you know, sometimes a stranger can

> take a fresh look at things and see the picture a lot clearer than those who

> have been involved all along. From what I see, people pretty much say and do

> what they want in this group, so I think I will do the same and express just

> a thought or two about things that occurred to me during my reading. If I am

> still welcome as a member after that, I shall look forward to getting to know

> you better.

>

> First and foremost, if I were your group leader I would just sit back and let

> the group run itself. You are all adults and can take care of yourselves.

> You do not need her to protect you, and she certainly does not need any more

> adversity in her life. This last flare-up particularly, is such a picayune

> thing, certainly hardly worth her entering into.

>

> If I may express my honest opinion here, it appears that you have already

> gotten rid of the greatest troublemakers in your group, and you have lost,

> I'm afraid, your greatest asset. I am speaking of Dr. Levin, of course.

> This man was a physician and pharmacist and is old enough to retire. You

> were extremely fortunate to have access to all of his experience. The fact

> that he had RLS and was so unbelievably devoted to this group, day and night,

> sweetened the pot even further. I regret not making his acquaintance. Life

> goes on.

>

> I'm certainly not going to sit here and pick your group apart. I am not a

> perfect person and I do not claim to possess any knowledge greater than what

> you all have. But at the same time, I may be a bit more outspoken than most,

> and I feel it is very important to be fair and honest. I sincerely hope that

> my observations will not offend the group as a whole.

>

> This latest altercation is actually funny, in my estimation. We have ,

> your group " Bad Boy " , a self-imposed title. Somehow I feel his behavior

> hides a heart of gold and a lot of pain. I suppose I could be wrong.

>

> And then there is " Coco " .

>

> This person's letters tell me

> more about her than I really want to know. Every group needs a Coco. She's

> a catalyst, if you know what I mean. I think she also has a good heart and

> would love to be helpful to the group. The trouble is that she is too

> arrogant for group encounters. She reminds me of Carla on Cheers. The first

> person she attacked was Connie, your group " Mom " (!), and from there on, she

> has made it evident that she will attack anyone. But it seems she prefers

> . Seems to me they are a good match. She makes no bones about the

> fact that she does NOT care what you think and she is going to do whatever

> she wants to, whether you like it or not. She will ignore all suggestions

> for communicating in a better way. She is an alternative medicine junkie who

> appears to try anything and everything, a zealot, whose life revolves around

> the word " natural " , which happens to be the biggest joke in the Universe at

> this point in time. Actually, just about everything there is was natural at

> some point. What I find most offensive about Coco is her " in your face "

> tone, which never, ever, EVER makes for good communication. She needs to

> learn to care about people's feelings and allow them the same priveleges that

> she allows herself. I would love to see her make this change, because it is

> people like this, ( and you have a few more that seem to be leaning in this

> direction ) that disrupt the flow of smooth and constructive communication.

>

> I am not suggesting she leave this group That would be extremely arrogant of

> ME!. I feel she really wants and needs to be helpful in some way to

> someone, and I'm certain that she is. She also makes things interesting. I

> expect I will be hearing from Coco before too long, but fear not, for I am

> also a match for her.

>

> I would also like to express my appreciation to the person who wrote the

> delightful poem " Ode To Restless Leg Syndrome " . I am not familiar with all

> of the people she mentioned, but she certainly has her facts straight and

> possesses a great sense of humor! I have printed this out and mounted it

> above my computer for when I need a guaranteed smile.

>

> I will withdraw into the background now and lurk for a while, content to have

> found a place where I finally feel that I " belong " . Thank you all for

> indulging me. I promise to be less opinionated in the future.

>

> " Morticia "

>

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support purposes

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licensed

> physician and no such claims are inferred.

[Guest guest]

Morticia,

Several things. First, I *love* the name you've picked - it's been a long

time since I've thought of the humor of the family. Second, I have no

idea how long you've been lurking, but you seem to have nailed the

personalities in this group. Now I get to just sit back and wait for the

fireworks to begin. Exciting!! Finally, welcome to the group! I will look

forward to more of your contributions.

, 35, Atlanta

[Guest guest]

Oh yes, just what we need - more excitement and fireworks. I sure do

appreciate a break from the boredom. God forbid we be allowed to settle

down for the space of a few days before staring all over again.

Thanks, but no thanks.ne, 59, Lawrenceville, NJ

--- L Kay lindakay@...> wrote:

>

>

> Morticia,

>

> Several things. First, I *love* the name you've picked - it's been a

> long

> time since I've thought of the humor of the family. Second, I

> have no

> idea how long you've been lurking, but you seem to have nailed the

> personalities in this group. Now I get to just sit back and wait for

> the

> fireworks to begin. Exciting!! Finally, welcome to the group! I will

> look

> forward to more of your contributions.

>

> , 35, Atlanta

>

>

>

>

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> This forum is for support only. The information posted to this List

> is for support purposes

> and is not intended to replace the examination, diagnosis and

> treatment of a licensed

> physician and no such claims are inferred.

>

_________________________________________________________