The Bickersons

[Guest guest]

Once upon a time there was a little girl who, it seemed, always had to get

her 2 cents worth in on every conversation carried on around her. If a

remark was made in her company that she did not agree with, being a very

strong-willed individual, she was extremely vociferous in her rebuttals. It

was as if she felt that her opinions were most important and MUST be heard

by ALL.

This little girl, a strawberry blond, as one might guess, had great

difficulty containing herself and her very strong opinions. She blurted

them out whenever and wherever she happened to be, probably believing

herself to be some sort of little curly-haired crusader out to cure the

world of all its miseries. Her reasoning behind her actions was that she

couldn't stand to think that anyone would be hurt by something if she

didn't warn them, or correct them, or inform them.

What she didn't understand was that in all her attempts to FIX everyone and

everything, she was actually causing some of the discomfort and problems of

the very people she was trying so hard to help.

One day when her good friend would not come out and play with her because

of words that had passed the previous day, her mother guessed it was time

to explain one of life's lessons to the little girl. Mother made some

special sandwiches and drinks and took her little girl to the big dining

room table. She asked the little girl what she thought had happened to make

her friend so upset. After they talked and exchanged ideas for a while the

little girl finally had to admit that it was her own attitude, however

kindly it was meant, that had caused the problem.

Mother helped her to understand that there were simply some times that one

MUST just keep their opinions to themselves and hold their tongues. It was

a hard lesson for the little girl who had become so adept at running off at

the mouth. But, gradually she began to practice what her mother had taught

her (though she will still not admit to it), and she saw that most of the

time, if she was quiet, that the arguments were shorter, and the

friendships were stronger. Mother taught her the value of the word, IGNORE.

She resists (most of the time) the urge to " straighten people out " and

" protect them from themselves. " She has at last realized that she is not

the only one who can be right and that she cannot FIX everything and

everyone around her that she loves. She has realized that most arguments

are a total waste of time and energy. And she has realized that even though

done out of love and caring, to impose one's opinions, to ridicule, or to

scoff at someone's ideas, causes pain to all involved. Rather than being of

help, it is being a hindrance.

The little girl tries to practice her lesson here and simply IGNORES the

issues that appear to be ones that will cause friction, and TRIES not to

answer back to statements intended to invite argument. She does not always

succeed...but she does TRY. :-)

Love to all

Judith