Re: increasing self-esteem

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 30/05/00 07:10:30 p.m. Pacific Daylight Time,

liliwigg@... writes:

<< I am always interested in how others with CMT increase their

self-esteem. Anyone got any tips?

Gretchen

>>

I was just talking to my husband about this. He was an abused child so he had

no self esteem either. We build up each other. We both work together to build

the kids up. We try to get them involved in things they like and can do

easily. Home depot has a free program for kids where they show them how to

build things with wood. They are part of a group and learn to work with

tools. They come away very proud of what they have made.

They can't do sports so I save a lot of money not paying the high

registration prices of Tee~ball , football , basketball, soccer etc.. It

seems every sports season I am buying something to help my kids feel good

about their lives, like a micro shooter or a video game. Guilt gifts I

believe they are called.

[Guest guest]

Hi Gretchen!!

I have struggled all my life with low self-esteem. Coming from an abusive

home and then an abusive husband, it was a serious battle to overcome my

past. But,

for the most part anyways, I did overcome. Self-esteem however can sometimes

nag at me... it can be up or down depending on the day. I try and use a

line from 12 steps... " act as if... " . The reason for this is because , I do

know who I am and what I have accomplished in my life. I know I am a good

person. I know I try hard in all I do, and I try to do a lot. I know I am

worth caring about and if nothing else I try to remember that I love me and

so does GOD. Spirituality is something I have learned and am continuing to

learn. It lifts me up and carries me through. Even on a bad day, I can

listen to some uplifting music and it helps me. Thanks for listening.

Take care of you.

Becca

http://www.onelist.com/subscribe/CMTweightmanagement

> I am always interested in how others with CMT increase their

> self-esteem. Anyone got any tips?

>

> Gretchen

>

[Guest guest]

Hi all. There are various tools I have to raise my self-esteem. The one I

find to be the most effective is to turn from my own problems and give my

attention to someone else in need. Not only does this enable me to forget

about my own drama for a while, it helps me to learn things about myself -

strengths, etc - and when I see another person genuinely smiling back at me

or hear that they have been feeling better than they were...well, I feel

better about myself.

I also do all I can to keep myself in shape. Here, I am not only speaking of

physical fitness; I am referring to my mental state, my emotional and

spiritual well-being. For me, this has required creativity and a willingness

to take risks. I have had to pursue insight and knowledge into myself and

what options are available. I have found many. Of course, each person must

find there own directions according to their individual lights.

What I will say is that some years back I gathered together my courage and

collected a bunch of songs I had written (simple songs really) and with a

friend formed a rock band. This band, despite personnel changes, stayed

together for about ten years. We performed live (I was the singer) and this

was quite a risk for me to get up there crutches and all. But I found out a

lot about myself; I found that I could successfully do MUCH more than I had

imagined. Furthermore, I found that I was not booed from the staged, being

called names. Quite to the contrary, generally I discovered people respected

me and were inspired by me to do more in their own lives. We cut a CD in '96

and that was something I had never imagined doing. While it received minimal

radio play, there was some, and besides, my kids think it is great.

I have also done poetry slams, etc. People have encouraged my writing. I

have been writing little pieces for a couple local papers and the editors

and readers really like what I do. I started a writer's group where I lived

(up in the mountains of northern California) and have learned a lot. I am

currently writing a novel.

In addition, I do lots of volunteer work - school site council, school

management team, board of directors for our local community's non-profit

community center which offers adult ed. classes and lots of other

life-enhancing opportunities. I have had the opportunity, through my

involvement with this community building work, to go to seminars all over

California, learning extensively about rebuilding through realizing and

utilizing ASSETS - taking the focus off problems and needs (while not

ignoring them) and placing it on whatever potentials and abilities there

are. This technique can be used by individuals, communities, etc. I could go

on, but you all probably get the idea. This process has been very important

to my self-esteem and realizing my potentials.

And just think, thirteen years ago I was going to my first AA meeting, sick

and with no self-confidence. I guess that was the first big risk I took

(though I really had no choice), and that was were I began to rediscover my

worth and my self-esteem.

For me, I now believe that my biggest obstacle was my own self-doubt and

self-hatred. Once I began getting that in perspective, I could see how much

I could offer. The CMT is only a part of me.

Hope that helped, Gretchen. Please forgive my wordiness. I sincerely hope my

words offended no one.

increasing self-esteem

> I am always interested in how others with CMT increase their

> self-esteem. Anyone got any tips?

>

> Gretchen

>

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