Patty

[Guest guest]

HI:

Just a thought, when my son was distracted and sitting and staring and it

looked like he was spaced out, he was obsessing and obsessing and doing

mental rituals to the max. I would talk to him and get no response. Of

course I did not realize this was his OCD as I thought it was mostly

tapping, stepping, checking, washing, etc. etc. Good luck, Aloha, Kathy

kathyh@...

At 08:59 AM 4/24/99 -0700, you wrote:

>From: Roman <ChrisRoman@...>

>

>>From: Patty <snafuhayes@...>

>>

>Hi Patty,

>

>I'm really working on understanding this " sitting and staring " phenomenon.

>In fact, lately the lack of Kelsey's ability to get through tasks is

>causing me more problems than the OCD. It's starting to pop up in school

>too, which concerns me. (But I need to get clarification from her teacher,

>we're also seeing a new obsession w/erasing which slows her down a lot.)

>

>After talking to her therapist, I'm thinking that perhaps she has some ADHD

>tendencies that perhaps would be considered " sub-clinical " but when the OCD

>is raging, they are magnified by some mechanism we don't understand. If so,

>it would be interesting to see if the problem goes away as she recovers

>from OCD. (I'd love to hear thoughts from the professionals on this one.)

>The therapist says he sess this a lot with OCD. Does your daughter have

>ADD/ADHD?

>

>Before last March (when OCD epidsodes came to stay), I had noticed this

>tendency from time to time, but was thinking she had outgrown it because

>she was doing great at getting through her morning routines. Now nothing

>seems to help. He suggested I do some " testing " on my own at this

>hypothesis. For example to give her a stimulant like coca-cola, chocolate,

>or coffee and see if she's calmer and more focused one hour later (since

>ADHD kids respond to stimulants, ie Ritalin.) If it works, I could use

>these kind of non-prescription stimulants to manage behavior. If not, ADD

>might not be the problemŠor it might be, but she'd need a

>prescription-strength med to manage the behavior. He said behavior mod

>programs and consequences won't work if it is ADDŠonly meds will. I'll keep

>you posted and good luckŠit's frustrating!

>

>in S.D.

>

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[Guest guest]

In a message dated 8/24/99 10:33:15 PM EST, pattymcd@... writes:

<< I understand your frustration. I can't believe this doctor isn't

giving you any treatment unless he's not a Lyme literate doctor. I

apologize for not remembering, but have we checked out where you live

in an attempt to find you a good doctor? It's just outrageous that

you're not getting any treatment at all. I'm so sorry. >>

Yes, Patty He is a lyme literate doc. and I live in NY. But I have already

been accused of being insensitive towards the doc who has refused to treat me

regardless of my active lyme and co infections and despite all of my

positive tests, Re; spects & mri's so .. I have decided to just keep my

opinions to myself from now on .

Thank you so much for your concern Patty your a Sweetheart ! Its good to know

that some folks also sympathize with the patients and not " only " with the

docs involved in this whole political mess !

Big Hugs,

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I hope you don't really believe anyone thinks you are insensitive.

I hear your frustration and do understand your anger, and you are right, the

doctors took an oath to treat. But, you are forgetting there is no proven

research that IV will cure us. If it were cheap, and there were no known

side effects, we would all get it, but the doctors and the Lyme victims are

being treated and diagnosed now by Managed Health care. The old days of

Marcus Welby, MD are gone, a doctor now has to PROVE everything, and if he

goes outside the realm of established treatment, he is restricted and may

lose his license. It is a strange world we live in, I don't think you are

insensitive, but I do think you are lashing out at the wrong group. Managed

care, Pharmaceutical companies who charge outlandish prices for drugs, and

our Government who permit this to go on, are the real culprits.

Please continue to vent, we all have different opinions and that is the

purpose of this forum, we all don't have to agree. I told you in a prior

post I have been exactly where you are, angry at my doctor,

problem is, there aren't too many doctors willing to treat, and maybe a lot

less available very soon.

I wish I knew the way to calm you right now, being sick like this is no

picnic, let alone all the adversity we have to face just trying to get

treated. Hope you feel a little better today,

Hugs,

Marta NJ

>From: BearyPrety@...

>Yes, Patty He is a lyme literate doc. and I live in NY. But I have

already

>been accused of being insensitive towards the doc who has refused to treat

me

>regardless of my active lyme and co infections and despite all of my

>positive tests, Re; spects & mri's so .. I have decided to just keep my

>opinions to myself from now on .

>Thank you so much for your concern Patty your a Sweetheart ! Its good to

know

>that some folks also sympathize with the patients and not " only " with the

>docs involved in this whole political mess !

>Big Hugs,

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Patty, it is an answer to prayers to hear from you. I have so many people

telling me we should go to Gainesville because it's closer. Well, I don't

care about closer, I want the best. We live in Haines City so it is about a

4 hr. drive to . Jodi's Gastroenterolgist is the one that referred us

to Dr. Reddy saying he is one of the best in the country. We are going to

try and get all the testing done before we hear from the transplant team

again with an appointment. Who is your doctor there and who did the

transplant? I hope you don't mind me asking but please tell me everything.

How are you doing now? I don't believe I have talked to you before, there is

another Patty in the group but that's Patty O'Brien. Debbie in West Palm

Beach will be interested in hearing what you say also as she is seeing Dr.

Jeffers at . Bless her heart she is a diabetic to boot. Thank you so

much for the post and I hope to hear from you soon. Take care and God bless,

Genny/Jodi's Mom

[Guest guest]

Thanks Patty for your reply. I don't think Dr. Reddy is thinking about

decreasing prednisone any further. Jodi is at 10 mg a day and if anything I

would think he would increase it but those are just my thoughts.......Where

do you live? The reason I asked is you said your liver came from Arkansas.

For some reason I thought it would have to come from this area or can you get

one if it becomes available any where in the country? How long were you on

the list before transplant? You were in distress so I am sure you were

bumped up, right?.......Thank goodness Jodi has not had the dreaded itching a

lot of people talk about. Sounds awful, in the summer my skin is so dry I

claw my legs until they bleed. That's bad enough but to itch all over most

be terrible....Don't worry your e-mail put my mind to rest about going some

where else, I don't care how far it is........Do you still have flare-ups?

We were told that even though you have a good liver after transplant the AIH

is still there and there is nothing from causing the AIH in attacking the new

liver. May take years but it happens....You have been more help than you

will ever know....Take care and thanks again. Genny/Jodi's Mom

[Guest guest]

Hi Patty, hope you are doing well. Just wanted you to know you most have

made a very good impression on the transplant team because they still

remember you. You were right, they are very nice and helpful. Take care and

God bless, Genny/Jodi's Mom MERRY CHRISTMAS

[Guest guest]

Thanks Patty: We were in Miami all day yesterday and I guess we will have

to take the apartment we found for $1,800. There is no in between down

there, you either pay 1,200 for a rat hole near the hospital in a VERY bad

area or go away in nice areas and pay 1,800. The nice thing about this one

is it will sleep 8 people pretty easily so they don't have to pay for a motel

the first 4 days and we can take that money and put towards the rent.

My Mom and stepdad are taking us down Wed. morning and we have to be

admitted at 4:00 for blood test and so on. I'm glad you will be posting to

the group cause we need your prayers guys.

By the way, I have seen it many times but will someone tell me how to stop

e-mail so it won't pile up while we are gone? You know I stay behind anyway.

Have many things still to do but thank God I don't have to work tomorrow.

Everyone take care and God bless.

Love, Genny & Jodi

[Guest guest]

Hi Genny,

As we all know, it will be such a relief for all of you when this is done.

Keep up your strength, we will all pray for a quick recovery for you both,

and I hope that Jodi will be feeling better than ever in no time. Peace be

with you, April

Re: [ ] Patty

> Thanks Patty: We were in Miami all day yesterday and I guess we will

have

> to take the apartment we found for $1,800. There is no in between down

> there, you either pay 1,200 for a rat hole near the hospital in a VERY bad

> area or go away in nice areas and pay 1,800. The nice thing about this

one

> is it will sleep 8 people pretty easily so they don't have to pay for a

motel

> the first 4 days and we can take that money and put towards the rent.

> My Mom and stepdad are taking us down Wed. morning and we have to be

> admitted at 4:00 for blood test and so on. I'm glad you will be posting

to

> the group cause we need your prayers guys.

> By the way, I have seen it many times but will someone tell me how to

stop

> e-mail so it won't pile up while we are gone? You know I stay behind

anyway.

> Have many things still to do but thank God I don't have to work tomorrow.

> Everyone take care and God bless.

> Love, Genny & Jodi

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Patty: Glad to hear your doing so well.

Genny

[Guest guest]

I have been reading your posts about the things that you and your daughter

are going through and I just wanted to tell you that I am amazed at your

strength! It has to be very difficult to deal with the things you are

dealing with. There are so many parents out there who just give up! Then the

kid really suffers or others suffer at the hands of the sick child. Keep up

the good work. Your daughter really needs you.

Amy in ohio

_________________________________________________________________

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 10/22/01 7:37:00 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

pattymanzanares@... writes:

> Please reply back thanks Patty in Calif.

>

>

Hi Patty,

Last month when my sons OCD flared up. I had to keep him home for a week. It

was really hard. He had never missed that much school before. During school

conferences I talked to his teachers. They are all working with him now. I

started him on Zoloft and Rispatal. He is so much better now. His OCD was the

negative thoughts and severe anxiety. I think because he just started his

freshmen year, It really let the OCD out.

Your not alone,

Jana in California

[Guest guest]

Amy, hi its patty, thank you for your wonderful comment, its greatly

appreciated, trust me im not as strong as you think. Take care Patty in

california.

Re: patty

I have been reading your posts about the things that you and your daughter

are going through and I just wanted to tell you that I am amazed at your

strength! It has to be very difficult to deal with the things you are

dealing with. There are so many parents out there who just give up! Then the

kid really suffers or others suffer at the hands of the sick child. Keep up

the good work. Your daughter really needs you.

Amy in ohio

_________________________________________________________________

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

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moderators are Birkhan, Kathy Hammes, Joye, Kathy Mac, Jule

Monnens, Gail Pesses, Kathy , Vivian Stembridge, and Jackie Stout.

Subscription issues or suggestions may be addressed to Louis Harkins, list

owner, at lharkins@... .

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 10/22/01 10:08:07 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

pattymanzanares@... writes:

> I don't want to play on the OCD either sometimes I'm not sure if its really

> her OCD or just don't quite feel like going to school, she has social

> problems and not many friends so i dont know

I know what you mean. The last time when my son stayed home for a week, I

knew it was the OCD. Because he's 14 and fell to pieces. Poor guy. That's

before he was treated. But after that once in a while he would use other

excuses. Now he just goes, because I'm a pretty good judge of the real boy.

He's doing pretty good now. He's very shy so he doesn't have very good social

skills ether. But he does have a select group of friends. Some are shy like

him, And some are the outgoing kids. I want him to leave his options open. I

don't want him to become obsessed with just one friend.

Smiles)))

Jana = California with you.

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone, this is Patty in calif., Im sitting here over a cup of coffee and

feeling guilty i kept my girl home from school today, she has missed about 4

full days since school started, between her bladder infections and today its the

new medication the dr put her on, its makeing her so tired , which the dr said

it would for awhile, but i feel guilty keeping her home, Her eyes were so

bloodshot and she was crying , she looked terrible so i kept her home , but im

feeling bad. How do other people do with there kids, do they stay home due to

bad ocd days, or medication? please reply back thanks Patty in calif.

Re: patty

I have been reading your posts about the things that you and your daughter

are going through and I just wanted to tell you that I am amazed at your

strength! It has to be very difficult to deal with the things you are

dealing with. There are so many parents out there who just give up! Then the

kid really suffers or others suffer at the hands of the sick child. Keep up

the good work. Your daughter really needs you.

Amy in ohio

_________________________________________________________________

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

You may subscribe to the Parents of Adults with OCD List at

parentsofadultswithOCD-subscribe . You may subscribe to the

OCD and Homeschooling List at ocdandhomeschooling-subscribe .

You may subscribe to the OCD Kids Support Group at

OCDKidsSupportGroup-subscribe . You may change your

subscription format or access the files, bookmarks, and archives for our list at

. Our list advisors are Tamar

Chansky, Ph.D., Aureen Pinto Wagner, Ph.D., and Dan Geller, M.D. Our list

moderators are Birkhan, Kathy Hammes, Joye, Kathy Mac, Jule

Monnens, Gail Pesses, Kathy , Vivian Stembridge, and Jackie Stout.

Subscription issues or suggestions may be addressed to Louis Harkins, list

owner, at lharkins@... .

[Guest guest]

Hi thanks for your reply back, you know i just feel real guilty when shes not

in school, patty

I dont want to play on the ocd eaither sometimes im not sure if its really her

ocd or just dont quite feel like going to school, she has social problems and

not many friends so i dont know, patty in calif.

Re: patty

In a message dated 10/22/01 7:37:00 AM Pacific Daylight Time,

pattymanzanares@... writes:

> Please reply back thanks Patty in Calif.

>

>

Hi Patty,

Last month when my sons OCD flared up. I had to keep him home for a week. It

was really hard. He had never missed that much school before. During school

conferences I talked to his teachers. They are all working with him now. I

started him on Zoloft and Rispatal. He is so much better now. His OCD was the

negative thoughts and severe anxiety. I think because he just started his

freshmen year, It really let the OCD out.

Your not alone,

Jana in California

[Guest guest]

HI Patty:

When our son, Steve, was very ill with his OCD and MDD we kept him home for

a couple of months. He was completely unable to manage school, even though

he really wanted to go. Sometimes our kids need what I call a mental

health day. Even my older NT son gets them at times. I can remember

taking them, with my parents permission, when I was in high school - VBG!

Adjusting to new meds can be quite tricky and time off can be very helpful.

It is a good idea to stay in touch with the school in case home hospital

tutoring might be appropriate. Perhaps there is some way for your daughter

to keep up with the material in class so returning to school is not so

difficult.

One thing living with OCD in the family has taught me is to give much more

credence to my intuition about what my child needs. I try not to make him

go to school when he is very resistant just so I can be at work without

worrying so much. When we think he is malingering or being manipulative we

take him to work with us which is so boring that unless he really needs to

be away he wants to get back to school. Otherwise we know if he stays home

it would be a marathon session on the computer playing games for hours

without end. Good luck, take care, aloha, kathy (h)

kathyh@...

At 07:35 AM 10/22/2001 -0700, you wrote:

>Hi everyone, this is Patty in calif., Im sitting here over a cup of coffee

and feeling guilty i kept my girl home from school today, she has missed

about 4 full days since school started, between her bladder infections and

today its the new medication the dr put her on, its makeing her so tired ,

which the dr said it would for awhile, but i feel guilty keeping her home,

Her eyes were so bloodshot and she was crying , she looked terrible so i

kept her home , but im feeling bad. How do other people do with there

kids, do they stay home due to bad ocd days, or medication? please reply

back thanks Patty in calif.

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

About the school attendance issues. There was a time

that our son would have to stay home because of his

illness. He missed a lot of middle school 6th year.

Here and there in 8,9,and 10th grade he missed a

significant amount of school. I would feel terrible

about it and it worried me to the point of tears.

In Washington state they have a law about truancy. It

is the parents responsibility to see that their kids

are attending school. Last year we had a very rocky

start and I could see that we would be going up in

front of the law if we didn't get an IEP for our son.

This year he has a 504 plan with attendance listed as

a consideration. This year he is doing very well and

has only missed two 1/2 days. Is your daughter getting

any special allowances for her absences? I would

always let the school know when our son was not going

to be there by calling into the office. I would have

them send homework by e-mail or I would go and pick it

up.Of corse many times he was not able to do it even

if he wanted to.

Hang in there Patty. I hope your daughter will be

finding the help she needs. Have you shared any of the

OCD resources with the school?

Take care,

Vivian

--- patricia manzanares <pattymanzanares@...>

wrote:

> Hi everyone, this is Patty in calif., Im sitting

> here over a cup of coffee and feeling guilty i kept

> my girl home from school today, she has missed about

> 4 full days since school started, between her

> bladder infections and today its the new medication

> the dr put her on, its makeing her so tired , which

> the dr said it would for awhile, but i feel guilty

> keeping her home, Her eyes were so bloodshot and she

> was crying , she looked terrible so i kept her home

> , but im feeling bad. How do other people do with

> there kids, do they stay home due to bad ocd days,

> or medication? please reply back thanks Patty in

> calif.

>

> Re: patty

>

>

> I have been reading your posts about the things that

> you and your daughter

> are going through and I just wanted to tell you that

> I am amazed at your

> strength! It has to be very difficult to deal with

> the things you are

> dealing with. There are so many parents out there

> who just give up! Then the

> kid really suffers or others suffer at the hands of

> the sick child. Keep up

> the good work. Your daughter really needs you.

>

> Amy in ohio

>

>

_________________________________________________________________

> Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at

> http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

>

>

>

> You may subscribe to the Parents of Adults with OCD

> List at

> parentsofadultswithOCD-subscribe .

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> at ocdandhomeschooling-subscribe .

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> OCDKidsSupportGroup-subscribe . You

> may change your subscription format or access the

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> .

> Our list advisors are Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., Aureen

> Pinto Wagner, Ph.D., and Dan Geller, M.D. Our list

> moderators are Birkhan, Kathy Hammes,

> Joye, Kathy Mac, Jule Monnens, Gail Pesses,

> Kathy , Vivian Stembridge, and Jackie Stout.

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> addressed to Louis Harkins, list owner, at

> lharkins@... .

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Vivian,thank you for writeing me, no she is not getting anything special due

to her attendance, what is a 504 plan and IEP please let me know what this is

THank you Patty in calif.

Re: patty

>

>

> I have been reading your posts about the things that

> you and your daughter

> are going through and I just wanted to tell you that

> I am amazed at your

> strength! It has to be very difficult to deal with

> the things you are

> dealing with. There are so many parents out there

> who just give up! Then the

> kid really suffers or others suffer at the hands of

> the sick child. Keep up

> the good work. Your daughter really needs you.

>

> Amy in ohio

>

>

_________________________________________________________________

> Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at

> http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

>

>

>

> You may subscribe to the Parents of Adults with OCD

> List at

> parentsofadultswithOCD-subscribe .

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> at ocdandhomeschooling-subscribe .

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> OCDKidsSupportGroup-subscribe . You

> may change your subscription format or access the

> files, bookmarks, and archives for our list at

> .

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> Pinto Wagner, Ph.D., and Dan Geller, M.D. Our list

> moderators are Birkhan, Kathy Hammes,

> Joye, Kathy Mac, Jule Monnens, Gail Pesses,

> Kathy , Vivian Stembridge, and Jackie Stout.

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> addressed to Louis Harkins, list owner, at

> lharkins@... .

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Vivian , yes all her teachers and her psychiologist had a conference call

about her situation, you know sometimes i dont know with my girl whats ocd and

whats not , she dosent always tell me when shes haveing repetive thoughts or

what, i just can tell shes confused, how could you tell with your son? what were

his signs and how was he acting or feeling when you would keep him home? Thanks

for your help Vivian your great, Patty in calif.

Re: patty

>

>

> I have been reading your posts about the things that

> you and your daughter

> are going through and I just wanted to tell you that

> I am amazed at your

> strength! It has to be very difficult to deal with

> the things you are

> dealing with. There are so many parents out there

> who just give up! Then the

> kid really suffers or others suffer at the hands of

> the sick child. Keep up

> the good work. Your daughter really needs you.

>

> Amy in ohio

>

>

_________________________________________________________________

> Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at

> http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

>

>

>

> You may subscribe to the Parents of Adults with OCD

> List at

> parentsofadultswithOCD-subscribe .

> You may subscribe to the OCD and Homeschooling List

> at ocdandhomeschooling-subscribe .

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> OCDKidsSupportGroup-subscribe . You

> may change your subscription format or access the

> files, bookmarks, and archives for our list at

> .

> Our list advisors are Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., Aureen

> Pinto Wagner, Ph.D., and Dan Geller, M.D. Our list

> moderators are Birkhan, Kathy Hammes,

> Joye, Kathy Mac, Jule Monnens, Gail Pesses,

> Kathy , Vivian Stembridge, and Jackie Stout.

> Subscription issues or suggestions may be

> addressed to Louis Harkins, list owner, at

> lharkins@... .

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Patty,

Don't feel guilty about keeping your daughter at home. Sometimes it

is really needed. Because we have such sleep issues, there have been

many times I have wanted to keep home...he does look bad.

But he always insists that he will be so far behind if he does (this

is really pretty true). The best I have been able to do is

occasionally keep him home for 1st period. But I would if I could...

Melinda S.

Dallas

> Hi everyone, this is Patty in calif., Im sitting here over a cup of

coffee and feeling guilty i kept my girl home from school today, she

has missed about 4 full days since school started, between her

bladder infections and today its the new medication the dr put her

on, its makeing her so tired , which the dr said it would for awhile,

but i feel guilty keeping her home, Her eyes were so bloodshot and

she was crying , she looked terrible so i kept her home , but im

feeling bad. How do other people do with there kids, do they stay

home due to bad ocd days, or medication? please reply back thanks

Patty in calif.

>

> Re: patty

>

>

> I have been reading your posts about the things that you and your

daughter

> are going through and I just wanted to tell you that I am amazed at

your

> strength! It has to be very difficult to deal with the things you

are

> dealing with. There are so many parents out there who just give up!

Then the

> kid really suffers or others suffer at the hands of the sick child.

Keep up

> the good work. Your daughter really needs you.

>

> Amy in ohio

>

> _________________________________________________________________

> Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at

http://explorer.msn.com/intl.asp

>

>

>

> You may subscribe to the Parents of Adults with OCD List at

parentsofadultswithOCD-subscribe@y... . You may subscribe to the

OCD and Homeschooling List at ocdandhomeschooling-subscribe@y... .

You may subscribe to the OCD Kids Support Group at

OCDKidsSupportGroup-subscribe@y... . You may change your

subscription format or access the files, bookmarks, and archives for

our list at . Our

list advisors are Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., Aureen Pinto Wagner, Ph.D.,

and Dan Geller, M.D. Our list moderators are Birkhan, Kathy

Hammes, Joye, Kathy Mac, Jule Monnens, Gail Pesses, Kathy

, Vivian Stembridge, and Jackie Stout. Subscription issues

or suggestions may be addressed to Louis Harkins, list owner, at

lharkins@b... .

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Patty: Congratulations on the promotion. Glad to hear your doing well.

Jodi is doing pretty good but had one of her bad headaches last night. Will

be glad when they decrease the Prograf. Miami is talking about taking her

off Medrol next month. Of course that would make her very happy.

I was in the hospital for a couple of days but doing OK now except for a sore

back where they poked me five times to get a spinal tap. My liver enzymes

are a little on the high side and eating my potassium but I'm taking K-Dur

and feeling better.

Good to hear from you, keep in touch.

Take care, Genny/Jodi's Mom

Living Donor Transplant 5-18-01

University of Miami

[Guest guest]

A spinal tap???? OUCH......I am very sorry that you had to go through that....I have heard they can be painful!

debby

Re: [ ] RE: Patty

Hi Patty: Congratulations on the promotion. Glad to hear your doing well. Jodi is doing pretty good but had one of her bad headaches last night. Will be glad when they decrease the Prograf. Miami is talking about taking her off Medrol next month. Of course that would make her very happy.I was in the hospital for a couple of days but doing OK now except for a sore back where they poked me five times to get a spinal tap. My liver enzymes are a little on the high side and eating my potassium but I'm taking K-Dur and feeling better.Good to hear from you, keep in touch.Take care, Genny/Jodi's MomLiving Donor Transplant 5-18-01University of Miami

[Guest guest]

susan i know it must be awful from her side, your right and i do try to think

about that,it just seems like all i ever think about is my daughter , like my

therapist says i dont even know how to think about me and if i dont start ill

never be any good to her . thanks for your reply, i really appreciate it patty

take care

Re: Marlys

So happy to hear that you had a great meeting with the school!

Amy in Ohio

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[Guest guest]

Hi Patty,

Funny, that's exactly what my therapist says...

Re: Marlys

So happy to hear that you had a great meeting with the school!

Amy in Ohio

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[Guest guest]

Patty..sorry so long to respond, I got to go away on a

trip, without the husband or kids (actually it may

have just been a dream haha). Although can go

for as long as three months without a flare up (PANDAS

OCD), when she flares, boy she flares. She becomes

very aggressive. I asked the same questions you have

to her doctor and she said to discipline her the same

way I would her brother who does not have OCD. So

when she acts that way I take away her favorite things

TV and I Love Lucy reruns. When she becomes very

physical I turn the handle around on her door and lock

her in her bedroom. I had turned her handle the right

way when she wasn't flared up. The last time she

flared and was physical I was trying to take a screw

driver and turn the handle around as she was hitting

me with her purse over and over again. I lock her in

there and she rants and raves and throws things around

and basically tears up her room. I leave her in there

for a while, sometimes a couple of hours. Eventually

she is exhausted and comes out relaxed and calm. Once

she is at that stage I say... " your consequence for

your behavior wasn't being locked in your room, that

was to keep you, me and your brother safe. Your

father and I will talk tonight about what your

consequence will be and we will let you know " . The

entire time she is in her room flipping out I am

usually in mine crying because of the hurtful way she

has treated me. She is under stress and I believe

that she needs to get those feelings out, but on her

own, not towards me or anyone else in her family. She

also needs to know that when you treat others badly

there are consequences. Once she has calmed down she

is able to take the consequence.

As for family, I have heard all the same stuff from

mine. They didn't think that I had good doctors for

her or that her problem really wasn't OCD. Then one

evening we were visiting with them and there was a

special on the Discovery Channel on OCD and two of the

doctor's that we have dealt with were on. I guess

they believe us now because if they were on tv then

they must be good!!! I finally told my mom that I

needed support from her and not her critisizing me. I

told her that if she thought she could do a better job

then she was welcome to come and try. Needles to say,

she has been much more understanding since then.

Although I did stand up for myself, it does leave you

handling the most difficult task you've ever

experienced...alone. It's very isolating. I have

finally learned that OCD is not an excuse for behaving

badly or directing that behavior towards

others...you're not a punching bag. Wait until the

storm clears, and follow through with a consequence.

Maybe next time she'll remember the consequence and

send the anger in a different direction. It has

worked for us, although it took us a while to finally

get the hang of it. When she is calm she usually will

say that she deserves the consequence and that her

behavior was wrong. Although she is only eight and

there is a big difference between eight and almost

twelve.

Anyway, I hope it helps.

Sonya

--- patricia manzanares <pattymanzanares@...>

wrote:

> I am writeing this note to all- my name is Patty in

> california and i have a daughter who is 11yr old

> going on 12 soon. she was diagnost with ocd with

> some psychiotic traits. These past few days have

> been sooo bad for the both of us , and ive talked so

> much i dont know where to begin, but again im

> desperate. my daughter was takeing resperdal and

> zoloft and doing pretty darn good then she was

> putting on so much weight she is 11 and weighs

> 165lbs i talked to doctor and he changed her

> medicine from resperdal to sequerl ,not sure about

> my spelling.anyway that was 2weeks ago. These past

> week has been terrible for her and i shes fighting

> with me , she threw a knife in the sink after

> cutting a piece of bread and said she was hopeing to

> hit me with it ( ocd) forsure then the other morning

> she was crying and complaining about her hair, i did

> her hair perfect and she was already late for school

> she went into the bathroom and took her hair tie out

> after i worked so hard on it and she was crying

> again i went to see why she was crying and saw what

> she had done and i was soooo upset and stressed i

> pushed her arm and said why did you take it all out

> and she for the first time slapped me back, i

> thought i was going to have a heart attack- but you

> know the rules no hitting your child. today she was

> at the table in the living room and so was i and she

> started spraying this canned blue spray paint from

> halloween , on the screen to my dining rm window , i

> said stop and she wouldnt , i was so upset i called

> my sister to talk, she proceeded to take the phone

> from my hand and we were pulling the phone back and

> fourth, then when i finally got the phone back , i

> was yelling cause i was so upset at her i called my

> sister and there she goes again she started spraying

> this paint in the living room i was livid and she

> has never done this before , i was totally out of

> control as the day went on it got worse and worse i

> called her psychiologist who spoke with my daughter

> and i , i feel like she was pourposley doing these

> things on pourpous to make me upset, i could say so

> much more but it would be so much typeing . I spoke

> with my mom and she really confused me, cause she

> dosent really believe in therapists and she dosent

> think my daughter has a illness, she says my

> daughter just has gotten away with so much in the

> past, i dont think im going to talk to my mom

> anymore about my daughter cause im really confused

> when i do. My daughter was diagnost by a chief of

> childrens psychiatry at childrens hospital , i would

> like her to be given some kind of testing , i dont

> know what but i know there has to be some kind of

> personality testing or something. If any one knows

> please let me know ok

> Anyway i dont have anyone else to talk to about

> this thats why i feel at times im going crazy, my

> concious is fighting with my subconcious all day

> long back and fourth , i keep makeing execuses for

> her but im getting real tired now, thanks for being

> here for me Patty in california.

>

> Re: Marlys

>

>

> So happy to hear that you had a great meeting with

> the school!

>

> Amy in Ohio

>

>

>

>

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>

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>

>

>