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My love to all of you dealing with loss and grief.

My son is still in hospital and I'm visiting daily.

Exhausted. A bit hurt that neither my mother or sister have done

anything to help out. At night I'm too tired to eat. When I

do eat a couple of spoonfuls is all that fits before it comes up on

me. Lots of milk, liquid meals, water. Fits of nausea for no

reason. At night my face goes numb. Nothing ever makes sense

with this illness. Yesterday while on the bus my bowels let go

(thank God, I barely eat.) Heart rate comparable for the most part

to that of a rabbit (ok easter bunny.) I just want him back home,

this is much more stressful for me and it's not doing him any good

either. The doctor has seen him just once in an entire week.

At the end of every day I wonder, why am I still standing? Or the

skyward gaze with " I know there's more, bring it on. " For

certain Louise, Sally and the rest of you eveready bunnies know the

feeling all too well.

Well gotta go, plants don't water themselves when your garden is

indoors. For persistent weeds, find someone who likes to

weed. I can think of little more soothing than weeding, just lack

the garden.

aletta mes, vancouver, bc canada

http://www.aletta.0catch.com

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