Re: Sex Drive Loss // Mis-placed?

[Guest guest]

.... the desire is there but the body isn't being cooperative

Other physical things I thought of... any medications that we use for sinus

(dry up) over the counter or Rx are not going to JUST dry up our sinus's --

other drugs also have a side effect of " dry mouth " -- well? Everything else

too right?

And, after hearing (VitaLady's) talk at our Houston Conference

yesterday talking about Vit. E as one we by-passed folks need to replace as

needed (in dry form) and one of E's things it does for us is the capillary

walls (good / not so good blood flow) not only is helpful with our hearts

and other vital organs but would stand to reason that our VITAL sexual

organs (men and women) need good blood flow (so what if our labs show us low

on Vit E... could that be part of the issue?)

Follow-up... which one of our lab tests shows our Vit. E. Levels?

Do other vitamins, minerals and/or such that we might be low in affect our

blood flow?

Just thinking of some things that are (some) specific to our WLS and others

that are just 'real' but we might be forgetting to factor in...

hugz,

~denise

[Guest guest]

No offense taken. Just this reminder (and refresher course) on how much

more/better attention I pay too my body NOW than I ever did. I was so

disconnected pre-op that I can't imagine how it functioned without me

attached. Now, I see all these subtleties, as well.

But it's a reminder to not go back as I was, but stay in touch with tiny

subtle changes.... hydration being a big one for me

Thanks,

Vitalady T

www.vitalady.com

Sex Drive Loss // Mis-placed?

> > I am 2 years postop. I still think that a lot of it is due to a high

> stress job and a boss that drives me nuts. I teach 3rd grade and have

> little energy at the end of the day.

> > Suze

>

> My husband and I had this " short talk " yesterday (in nice fashion) sort of

> counting all the balls we are juggling right now (trying not to drop

> anything) work (joys and frustrations) children, grand children, his

> friends, my friends, our shared friends, PTA meetings and work meetings

and

> meeting friends for dinner... our collective calendars are full of

> appointments, meetings, scheduled travel, scheduled events and then we try

> to juggle the rest in-between...

> We ended up with a " why don't we have a date scheduled on there for US??? "

>

> I'm 2 years post op too and while my sex drive isn't lost I do often

> mis-place it and so does he -- on the up side we both realize we do this

> and are agreeable to learning new ways to find / make time for US (Is 3

a.m.

> tomorrow good for you?) ~smile~ We not only have to make time but put US

in

> a higher priority status.

>

> Since loosing weight -- I find I can do about 10X the amount of things I

> could do before -- that makes me a real busy person. He's always been a

real

> busy person...

>

> I am concerned that I do compare my sex drive now to how it was the first

> year when my hormones were raging (you could actually see little pink

> bubbles all around me.... LOL) and how it is now -- more level, not as

much

> as I'd like but sometimes too much to find time for...

> Then I get concerned that if we " make " the time is my sex drive going to

be

> there with me??? And, if it isn't is that just OK... can we just snuggle,

> have grown-up time and enjoy each others company for a little while -- and

> if not, we do need to see a councilor about that -- if we can, will it

> always be that way or will the real amorous feelings emerge in time? And

on

> and on... all that on the psychological end of it I think...

>

> So, if y'all excuse me for getting a little graphic here -- I think I will

> worry about the " physical " aspects when I feel something is physically

> wrong -- for men it is usually the desire is there but it just isn't

> happening ya' know? And, it is more of an obvious physical thing for men

but

> the same holds true for women... the desire is there but the body isn't

> being cooperative (this is the part where the MD's tell us to use a water

> based lubricant and get over it...)

> I'm also aware that some women have mentioned that it is painful (when it

> wasn't always painful...) to me, this is another " physical " issue that a

> doctor can be addressed about...

>

> I guess my question -- to help us " non-medical " or " not informed " folks is

> what other real " physical " manifests should we be looking for?

>

> And at the risk of being crude but I'm really NOT trying to be -- I have

> found for myself if I am not well hydrated (enough water) then I see a BIG

> difference in my bodies ability to " respond " in the appropriate manner.

(ok,

> get wet) Sorry -- just being clear to try to be helpful -- I didn't put 2

> and 2 together until I realized this was almost always happening in the

wee

> hours of the morning (before getting up, drinking my water and so on....)

> and it almost always included cramps in my feet or legs (post weight loss

> one of the more obvious physical side effects of not enough water can be

> cramping in feet or legs) -- put together that makes PERFECT sense that my

> body doesn't have the fluid needed to respond.

> Since sort of putting those together, now if it is the middle of the night

> or wee hours or coming in from outside after gardening or other sweaty

> work/play fun -- I grab a bottle of water FIRST and guzzle that while just

> chatting, laughing, getting re-acquainted or just being silly -- the water

> in me really helps ('specially the cramping that ALWAYS happens at the

worst

> possible time!)

>

> I'm sure their are others of you who have found some " issues " that are

> directly related to the WL that change or affect the way our bodies

work --

> being well hydrated for me is just one of those things that we found

helps.

>

> Now, I feel like I may have offended some for being so graphic but I

> promise I didn't intend that at all... Just sharing something that did

fall

> into an important " aspect " of post-op, water needs and body responding to

> that.

>

> hugz,

> ~denise

>

>

> Homepage: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG

>

> Unsubscribe: mailto:Graduate-OSSG-unsubscribe

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Generally speaking, they don't test for E. The reasoning being that the E

test alone costs about as much as the entire series that routinely run.

I've never had mine tested, darnit. And I just LOVE looking at my labs.

Gives me such a sensation of control!

Thanks,

Vitalady T

www.vitalady.com

RE: Sex Drive Loss // Mis-placed?

> ... the desire is there but the body isn't being cooperative

>

> Other physical things I thought of... any medications that we use for

sinus

> (dry up) over the counter or Rx are not going to JUST dry up our

sinus's --

> other drugs also have a side effect of " dry mouth " -- well? Everything

else

> too right?

>

> And, after hearing (VitaLady's) talk at our Houston Conference

> yesterday talking about Vit. E as one we by-passed folks need to replace

as

> needed (in dry form) and one of E's things it does for us is the capillary

> walls (good / not so good blood flow) not only is helpful with our hearts

> and other vital organs but would stand to reason that our VITAL sexual

> organs (men and women) need good blood flow (so what if our labs show us

low

> on Vit E... could that be part of the issue?)

> Follow-up... which one of our lab tests shows our Vit. E. Levels?

>

> Do other vitamins, minerals and/or such that we might be low in affect our

> blood flow?

>

> Just thinking of some things that are (some) specific to our WLS and

others

> that are just 'real' but we might be forgetting to factor in...

>

> hugz,

> ~denise

>

>

> Homepage: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG

>

> Unsubscribe: mailto:Graduate-OSSG-unsubscribe

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I think the whole thing is interesting in a physical sense but I

think if you're not " there " mentally and the desire isn't there then

you don't get the physical response. The body will provide that when

you ARE in the mood cuz the guy is super HOT and you really Want to

be with him, things will work because you're wanting to be with that

person. In a long term monogamous relationship the dynamics can

change so that , yes you're comfortable with that person, but it is

old stuff and its hard to get excited over the same old stuff. Maybe

a break would help, or trying something new, what do I know, but I do

think that the body will still provide what's needed, dehydrated or

not if you're really in the mood.

hugs,

Ramoth

> No offense taken. Just this reminder (and refresher course) on how

much

> more/better attention I pay too my body NOW than I ever did. I was

so

> disconnected pre-op that I can't imagine how it functioned without

me

> attached. Now, I see all these subtleties, as well.

>

> But it's a reminder to not go back as I was, but stay in touch with

tiny

> subtle changes.... hydration being a big one for me

>

>

> Thanks,

>

>

> Vitalady T

> www.vitalady.com

>

> Sex Drive Loss // Mis-placed?

>

>

> > > I am 2 years postop. I still think that a lot of it is due to

a high

> > stress job and a boss that drives me nuts. I teach 3rd grade and

have

> > little energy at the end of the day.

> > > Suze

> >

> > My husband and I had this " short talk " yesterday (in nice

fashion) sort of

> > counting all the balls we are juggling right now (trying not to

drop

> > anything) work (joys and frustrations) children, grand children,

his

> > friends, my friends, our shared friends, PTA meetings and work

meetings

> and

> > meeting friends for dinner... our collective calendars are full of

> > appointments, meetings, scheduled travel, scheduled events and

then we try

> > to juggle the rest in-between...

> > We ended up with a " why don't we have a date scheduled on there

for US??? "

> >

> > I'm 2 years post op too and while my sex drive isn't lost I do

often

> > mis-place it and so does he -- on the up side we both realize we

do this

> > and are agreeable to learning new ways to find / make time for US

(Is 3

> a.m.

> > tomorrow good for you?) ~smile~ We not only have to make time but

put US

> in

> > a higher priority status.

> >

> > Since loosing weight -- I find I can do about 10X the amount of

things I

> > could do before -- that makes me a real busy person. He's always

been a

> real

> > busy person...

> >

> > I am concerned that I do compare my sex drive now to how it was

the first

> > year when my hormones were raging (you could actually see little

pink

> > bubbles all around me.... LOL) and how it is now -- more level,

not as

> much

> > as I'd like but sometimes too much to find time for...

> > Then I get concerned that if we " make " the time is my sex drive

going to

> be

> > there with me??? And, if it isn't is that just OK... can we just

snuggle,

> > have grown-up time and enjoy each others company for a little

while -- and

> > if not, we do need to see a councilor about that -- if we can,

will it

> > always be that way or will the real amorous feelings emerge in

time? And

> on

> > and on... all that on the psychological end of it I think...

> >

> > So, if y'all excuse me for getting a little graphic here -- I

think I will

> > worry about the " physical " aspects when I feel something is

physically

> > wrong -- for men it is usually the desire is there but it just

isn't

> > happening ya' know? And, it is more of an obvious physical thing

for men

> but

> > the same holds true for women... the desire is there but the body

isn't

> > being cooperative (this is the part where the MD's tell us to use

a water

> > based lubricant and get over it...)

> > I'm also aware that some women have mentioned that it is painful

(when it

> > wasn't always painful...) to me, this is another " physical " issue

that a

> > doctor can be addressed about...

> >

> > I guess my question -- to help us " non-medical " or " not informed "

folks is

> > what other real " physical " manifests should we be looking for?

> >

> > And at the risk of being crude but I'm really NOT trying to be --

I have

> > found for myself if I am not well hydrated (enough water) then I

see a BIG

> > difference in my bodies ability to " respond " in the appropriate

manner.

> (ok,

> > get wet) Sorry -- just being clear to try to be helpful -- I

didn't put 2

> > and 2 together until I realized this was almost always happening

in the

> wee

> > hours of the morning (before getting up, drinking my water and so

on....)

> > and it almost always included cramps in my feet or legs (post

weight loss

> > one of the more obvious physical side effects of not enough water

can be

> > cramping in feet or legs) -- put together that makes PERFECT

sense that my

> > body doesn't have the fluid needed to respond.

> > Since sort of putting those together, now if it is the middle of

the night

> > or wee hours or coming in from outside after gardening or other

sweaty

> > work/play fun -- I grab a bottle of water FIRST and guzzle that

while just

> > chatting, laughing, getting re-acquainted or just being silly --

the water

> > in me really helps ('specially the cramping that ALWAYS happens

at the

> worst

> > possible time!)

> >

> > I'm sure their are others of you who have found some " issues "

that are

> > directly related to the WL that change or affect the way our

bodies

> work --

> > being well hydrated for me is just one of those things that we

found

> helps.

> >

> > Now, I feel like I may have offended some for being so graphic

but I

> > promise I didn't intend that at all... Just sharing something

that did

> fall

> > into an important " aspect " of post-op, water needs and body

responding to

> > that.

> >

> > hugz,

> > ~denise

> >

> >

> > Homepage: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Graduate-OSSG

> >

> > Unsubscribe: mailto:Graduate-OSSG-unsubscribe@y...

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >