Should we really tell others?

[Guest guest]

I don't know about this one! Yes, I am at a point where I am far

enough out know one would ever know. Except I attend this college

singles bible study group and some know me from before or know I had

the surgery so that's really hard when I don't want to say anything

to the one's who don't know. Except that since I am always the

lucky 1% to have any possible complication from this surgery then

every one seems to know. Yes, I do get tired of talking about it to

people who couldn't possibly understand but I do enjoy tell the

others that need it or thinking about it so it depends on the

situation and the person. I have no problem answering e-mails

regarding obesityhelp.com though.

The other thing about people knowing is that they are waiting for

you to fail especially the one's with a weight problem. Yes, I told

people I've gained back 20lbs and I wonder what they think all the

time and even I have this feeling that my own family was waiting for

me to fail. I have never been successful in the past what makes

this time different? For one this is a tool a very helpful tool and

for me to gain weight I have to get totally off track and say I

don't care or really fall back into the old habits that helped me

become morbidy obese in the first place.

Now that the weight is gone I accept and acknowledge the things I

used to do so I know what triggers the old habits and can work hard

to ignore them. The other thing I worry about is telling guys that

I want to date see I have to say something about the surgery because

they always wonder why I am eating so little and other stuff... I

struggle with that and it is hard for me to get close to people

because of the fear I have of friendships and relationships. So I

hesitate who I share this with but am finding that the people I do

tell are so accepting and wish me the best so it really isn't so bad

after all. But again there are the days that you don't want to tell

anyone becuase I am either embarrased for some reason or you don't

want everyone looking over your shoulder asking can you eat that?

I am also afraid because I am so young and have my whole life ahead

of me I am only going to be 25 this October. Most of you all are

older and are wishing you could've had the sugery at the age I did.

I had enough of being morbidly obese since I had been since I was 13

years old so no I don't know what its like to me married and have

kids that were embarassed of you yet accepted you as you were.

That's enough for now I need to go help at a new student orientation

at the college I attend,

Kristy

prox lap RNY

5/21/99

342 got to 155 gained back to 175-180 now I am 5'8

Did develop a gastro-gastric fistula and I am transected only 1%

develop them why did I have to be the lucky 1%. I still don't see

how and its only the size of a pin hole. My surgeon doesn't want it

to get bigger so next week he will be going down with a scope to

inject some filler material in it. I will be the first one he had

fixed excited a little, scared yes, but beats the alternative of

having a revision. I'll let you all know what happens I hope it

works.