Jokes

[Guest guest]

Q: What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?

A: Kids don't eat broccoli.

Q: When they fly the flag at half-mast over the Post Office, what

does it mean?

A: " We're hiring! "

WITTY TEETH

A woman phoned her dentist when she received a huge bill. " I'm

shocked! " she complained. " This

is three times what you normally charge. "

" Yes, I know, " said the dentist. " But you yelled so loud, you scared

away two other patients. "

FIRE FIDO

A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids

home one day when a fire

truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a

Dalmatian dog.

The children fell to discussing the dog's duties.

" They use him to keep crowds back, " said one youngster.

" No, " said another, " he's just for good luck. "

Then a third child brought the argument to a close. " They use the

dog, " she said firmly, " to find

the fire hydrant. "

WHY AGING ISN'T SO BAD:

Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember

them either.

No one expects you to run into a burning building.

There's nothing left to learn the hard way.

Your joints are more accurate than the National Weather Service.

In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.