Re: Re: Mt.Sinai Support Group Meeting

[Guest guest]

There's an interesting idea! There are several of us who have posted to this

list who are in search of support. Many of these have been ds post-ops!

Where and when do you meet? Maybe if you post the info, some of the Mt Sinai

ds post-ops will come. The more options, the better.

----- Original Message -----

>

> A friend of mine who has had the RNY procedure and I have started a

> support group open to all who have had weight loss surgery regardless

> of the procedure or surgeon in the NY/NJ area. Our goal is to provide

> information and support to anyone pre or post op. While I am the only

> DS patient at this point in the group, I do believe that will change

> and I will be able to encourage others on their journey as I have

> been encouraged. We have power in our numbers to combat the issues

> and struggles we face as fat people and as weight loss surgery

> patients.

[Guest guest]

There's an interesting idea! There are several of us who have posted to this

list who are in search of support. Many of these have been ds post-ops!

Where and when do you meet? Maybe if you post the info, some of the Mt Sinai

ds post-ops will come. The more options, the better.

----- Original Message -----

>

> A friend of mine who has had the RNY procedure and I have started a

> support group open to all who have had weight loss surgery regardless

> of the procedure or surgeon in the NY/NJ area. Our goal is to provide

> information and support to anyone pre or post op. While I am the only

> DS patient at this point in the group, I do believe that will change

> and I will be able to encourage others on their journey as I have

> been encouraged. We have power in our numbers to combat the issues

> and struggles we face as fat people and as weight loss surgery

> patients.

[Guest guest]

There's an interesting idea! There are several of us who have posted to this

list who are in search of support. Many of these have been ds post-ops!

Where and when do you meet? Maybe if you post the info, some of the Mt Sinai

ds post-ops will come. The more options, the better.

----- Original Message -----

>

> A friend of mine who has had the RNY procedure and I have started a

> support group open to all who have had weight loss surgery regardless

> of the procedure or surgeon in the NY/NJ area. Our goal is to provide

> information and support to anyone pre or post op. While I am the only

> DS patient at this point in the group, I do believe that will change

> and I will be able to encourage others on their journey as I have

> been encouraged. We have power in our numbers to combat the issues

> and struggles we face as fat people and as weight loss surgery

> patients.

[Guest guest]

hi, heather..would be interested in your ny/nj support group..where?..when?

>

>Reply-To: duodenalswitch

>To: duodenalswitch

>Subject: Re: Mt.Sinai Support Group Meeting

>Date: Sat, 19 May 2001 15:16:18 -0000

>

>I also have a bad feeling about the support group, but this comes

>from my experience on the Mt Sinai DS support group email list. I

>found it to be cliquish and unwelcoming. Granted, I was not

>technically a patient of Dr. Herron's at the time, I was pretty much

>committed to his program if he thought I was a good candidate. I

>posted to the group looking to find someone in my area who might be

>willing to car pool to the support group meeting at the hospital. Not

>only was my post ignored, but I was not even welcomed to the group.

>If this is the way people are on a email group, what does it say for

>them in person? What I've heard from you all regarding your

>experiences at the support group meeting seems to indicate that my

>assessment is not too off base.

>

>A friend of mine who has had the RNY procedure and I have started a

>support group open to all who have had weight loss surgery regardless

>of the procedure or surgeon in the NY/NJ area. Our goal is to provide

>information and support to anyone pre or post op. While I am the only

>DS patient at this point in the group, I do believe that will change

>and I will be able to encourage others on their journey as I have

>been encouraged. We have power in our numbers to combat the issues

>and struggles we face as fat people and as weight loss surgery

>patients.

>

>Personally, unless there are changes in the Mt Sinai Group, I doubt

>that I will ever attend their meetings.

>

>M

>

>

>

>

>

>

> > You know, when I originally posted my complaints about that meeting

>to the

> > list, I had second thoughts about it. I thought: this is just

>whining.

>

>

>

>----------------------------------------------------------------------

>

[Guest guest]

I went to the meeting last month and I asked a qustion and was told that pre-ops were not to speak during the meeting. I would like to say though , When reflecting on the meeting schedule , Ds support group, I was under the assumption that the DS only was to be discussed. I thought the meeting was going to go deep in details as far as the procedures before and after and what was to be expected. It was very difficult to hold my tongue until after the meeting. However, I did get to meet some people most who have already been switched and a few like myself. They welcomed me to the next meeting and I did leave there feeling as though even though I was not allowed to speak during the meeting, I was glad that I had come. It does make a difference to me to see , not only to write but to meet with those face to face that have gone through with it. I also got to see some scars and a might add very minimal due to the lap Ds. I now know that the pre-op Q & A is the meeting to go to for Pre-ops who have questions though sometimes the dr. is late or may not show. But if as a pre-op you can hold your tongue or perhaps write down your questions and address them after the meeting I'm sure you will find someone willing to answer your questions. I've heard that after loosing so much weight, your relationship with the you approach the world and vice versa changes and some can find it hard or even intimidating at times so they come to the support group to vent and share the new events going on and leave the meeting feeling that perhaps what they are going through others maybe as well. I don't think that the group means to be insensitive in anyway, I just think that perhaps because of giving so much of themselves and sacrificing so much of themselves prior to being switched, thus maybe to the point that one can and has lost touch with self and identity to the point that we have gotten to as far as the weight is concerned with all the weight related illnesses etc. This I can say for myself I personally have exp. with the dicrimination of obesity in the world, instead of making known what I want, need, or expect from others, I tend to be a people pleaser. (god forbid one other person find a reason to dislike me) so yes I bit my tongue and look who is on the losing end, me with my weight of 277lbs and health related CO. But God is gracious and has given me a second chance. Society may try and write me off but I'll be damned if I won't let my voice be heard. I WILL BE SWITCHED! So the next time if you do attend a support group, Just know that the group is letting there voice be heard and no longer biting their tongue! Amen! No disrespect intended. Just my opinion. Rose

[Guest guest]

I went to the meeting last month and I asked a qustion and was told that pre-ops were not to speak during the meeting. I would like to say though , When reflecting on the meeting schedule , Ds support group, I was under the assumption that the DS only was to be discussed. I thought the meeting was going to go deep in details as far as the procedures before and after and what was to be expected. It was very difficult to hold my tongue until after the meeting. However, I did get to meet some people most who have already been switched and a few like myself. They welcomed me to the next meeting and I did leave there feeling as though even though I was not allowed to speak during the meeting, I was glad that I had come. It does make a difference to me to see , not only to write but to meet with those face to face that have gone through with it. I also got to see some scars and a might add very minimal due to the lap Ds. I now know that the pre-op Q & A is the meeting to go to for Pre-ops who have questions though sometimes the dr. is late or may not show. But if as a pre-op you can hold your tongue or perhaps write down your questions and address them after the meeting I'm sure you will find someone willing to answer your questions. I've heard that after loosing so much weight, your relationship with the you approach the world and vice versa changes and some can find it hard or even intimidating at times so they come to the support group to vent and share the new events going on and leave the meeting feeling that perhaps what they are going through others maybe as well. I don't think that the group means to be insensitive in anyway, I just think that perhaps because of giving so much of themselves and sacrificing so much of themselves prior to being switched, thus maybe to the point that one can and has lost touch with self and identity to the point that we have gotten to as far as the weight is concerned with all the weight related illnesses etc. This I can say for myself I personally have exp. with the dicrimination of obesity in the world, instead of making known what I want, need, or expect from others, I tend to be a people pleaser. (god forbid one other person find a reason to dislike me) so yes I bit my tongue and look who is on the losing end, me with my weight of 277lbs and health related CO. But God is gracious and has given me a second chance. Society may try and write me off but I'll be damned if I won't let my voice be heard. I WILL BE SWITCHED! So the next time if you do attend a support group, Just know that the group is letting there voice be heard and no longer biting their tongue! Amen! No disrespect intended. Just my opinion. Rose

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 5/19/01 12:28:10 PM, duodenalswitch writes:

<< The supposed complaints the doctor was

talking about came from people who do not attend the meetings. The people

who do attend the meetings, i.e. the people who were in the room, are pretty

much happy with how things are going. >>

UGGHH.. the complaints are most likely from people who PREVIOUSLy attended

meetings but do not any longer (myself included in that group). It is not

like people never came to meetings or only showed up one time who were

unsatisfied with the way things were going there.

That being said, it is true that not all groups are for everyone. I prefer

an open, accepting atmosphere where people DO discuss emotional issues

related to surgery, post-op life, etc. and NOT just discuss nutrition, body

work (this stuff IS very important, don't get me wrong, but it seemed to me

that all these more 'surface' or 'physical' topics were overshadowning other

issues that were rarely if ever brought up when I was there. Also, from what

I've heard from others, they were rarely if ever discussed before or after I

attended the meetings).

My issue isn't so much that pre-ops are treated rather rudely (which I do

believe is true and every pre-op IS an eventual post-op who does remember

that experience). Rather, I didn't think the group addressed any more

intimate or personal issues. The group size does play somewhat into this but

I (and others) have suggested breaking up into smaller sub-groups for

discussion at least for a portion of the meeting time. This was a very

successful technique I used when I taught larg(er) groups.

Of course, you can look at the remaining people and say 'hey, we're the

clique we always wanted to be' and they will be happy without any dissent or

difference of opinion. It is not a big surprise to me that current members

of the group feel that anyone who dissents and is no longer present (many of

whom did dissent when they were present and were shot down or ignored) is

just to be brushed aside. Another way to approach the issue is recognizing

that many people DO feel alienated and something ****may**** just be a little

off with the current member's attitudes or beliefs.

all the best,

lap DS with gallbladder removal

Dr. Gagner/Dr. Quinn assisting/Mt. Sinai/NYC

January 25, 2001

almost 4 months post-op and still feelin' fab!

pre-oP: 307 lbs/bmi 45 (5'9 " )

now: 254 lbs (still comin' off!)