Re: The first time I realized I was fat

[Guest guest]

Marissa,

I will hop on to the USC group as well. Also, I missed the support meeting

last month but do plan to attend this month at USC if possible. I live in

Glendale and I work in West LA, so its kind of on my way home. Hope to see

you there one day. Where else do you meet?

Jenn

>

>Reply-To: duodenalswitch

>To: duodenalswitch >

>Subject: Re: The first time I realized I was fat

>Date: Fri, 27 Apr 2001 18:20:19 -0700

>

>Jenn,

>

>I can relate to much of what you said. I would always think " blob " when I

>caught my reflection in a window. I would ask my husband if I was bigger

>or

>smaller than other fat people if saw.

>

>We're a mess!!

>

>I want to invite you (and anyone else who wants to) to join the USC online

>support list as well. The address is: www.ds_usc

>

>What city do you live in? We try to get together once a month in addition

>to

>the support meeting at USC.

>

>Love,

>

>Marisa

>Dr. Anthone

>5'3 " BMI 45 256#

>Surgery 11/17/00

>11/17/00 - 256#

>12/17/00 - 222#

>1/17/01 - 206#

>2/17/01 - 193#

>3/17/01 - 184#

>4/17/01 - 173#

>83# gone FOREVER!

>

>

>

> The first time I realized I was fat

>

>

> > Hey girls and boys. I can't pinpoint an exact time when I realized that

>I

> > was abnormal or fat. I gradually gained weight through my entire

>childhood,

> > teens and 20's. When I was about 24, I lost 85 pounds and got down to

>180

>or

> > so for a very brief time and I remember hat wonderful feeling still. I'm

>31

> > now and do not want to spend my entire 30's gaining as I did before. I

>was

> > always lucky growing up to have incredible friends who didn't give a

>damn

> > about my weight. My best friemds now are the ones I made in grammer

>school

> > adn high school. I went to all the dances (but usually with guy

> " friends " )

> > and my relationships always grew from what was a friendship first. It

>always

> > took them a while to look past the fat and realize I was a fab person

> > regardless.

> >

> > Once I went off to college in San Diego, things got a little more

>difficult.

> > Everyone was blond and thin and I was neither. I lasted one semester

>there,

> > went to community college and then got my degree after two years at Long

> > Beach State. There is one specific incident I remember that really hurt

>me

> > to the core. As if going to the gynecologist isn't bad enough, I had my

> > yearly checkup (this is probably 8 years or so ago), and after the

>checkup

> > as I'm still sitting there naked, my gyno (a female) says to me " You

>have

> > such a pretty face it's too bad your so fat " . In those exact words. I

>was

>so

> > shocked I didn't say a thing. I left that office, called her on the

>phone

> > and told her ass off. How unprofessional can you be? I asked for my

>records

> > adn have since been going to a wonderful gyno (a man) that has never

>once

> > mentioned my weight. When I think about it even now, I get fired up.

> >

> > Another thing I've done for years (and tell me if you guys so this too)

>is

> > that when I see a heavy or obese person, I think to myself " Am I that

>fat? "

> > or " Do I look like that? I wonder if they weigh less or more than me " . I

> > don't feel fat on the inside, but externally when I can't fit into a

>seat,

> > etc..I'm forced to face reality. Lately, if I catch a glimpse of my

> > reflection in a window or something, I don't recognize myself. Ok, I'm

> > babbling. Just wanted to put a few thoughts out there.

> >

> > Jenn

> > Pre-op, Dr. Anthone

> > 326 lbs

> > _________________________________________________________________

> > Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com

> >

> >

> > ----------------------------------------------------------------------

> >