To TERESA N-C/Re: Dr Ren, M.

[Guest guest]

<<<

>>>>

Gobo: I honestly do not consider 's post a personal attack.

She actually works in the psychiatric profession, I believe and her

statements were totally general and had to do with helping others

through painful period. Her advice: listen rather than try to give

advice.

If she inferred that you were invalidating Deb's pain, that's her opinion.

Who knows for sure? Deb has been talked about on all sides but

hasn't been central to the thread so I really don't know.

Just as you are entitled to make suggestions to Deb on how to proceed,

is totally within her rights to suggest that, when someone is in

pain, perhaps the best thing to do is to be empathetic and listen.

If others agreed with , that does not mean there is a consensus

among all members of the group. I do recall quite a few replies that

supported your posts, etc. as well. I don't think it's any kind of vs.

you

situation. I don't think it's any right-wrong situation, either. People

have

had very different and very strong opinions about the subject and I don't

think anyone has personally insulted anyone else.

Perhaps doesn't think the issue needs to be dragged out - I have

no idea why she didn't respond to any personal e-mails. ACtually, I was

referring to your original post about Deb when you said you had already

mentioned these things to her privately. Then, they were posted to the

group.

The majority of people involved have said that they were

going to drop the thread and continue on a private/individual posting basis

if there needed to be continued discussion. I think this is a great

solution.

I don't like that you still feel hurt/upset by comments made and/or haven't

received the resolution you would hope for. Maybe some people will never

meet totally eye to eye. I certainly hope you don't want to leave the group

nor do I want anyone to feel they cannot speak out for whatever reason.

Just know that if you DO speak out, others may not necessarily agree. I

think in most cases there will be people who applaud your position as well

as people who don't agree with it.

This group isn't even moderated in any strict sense of the word. If things

get

heated then (or I) will just try to smooth things out. In no way do

we encourage or want anyone to 'shut up' or not express their opinions.

This group

All the best,

NOverr-Chin

co-mother, duodenalswitch

laparoscopic BPD/DS with gallbladder removal

Dr. Gagner/Dr. Quinn assisting/Mt. Sinai/NYC

January 25, 2001

90 days post-op and still feelin' fab!