Hugging (was Re: hair pulling)

July 20, 2001

> I feel a bit tentative about saying this, less it be construed as a

> criticism of people's loved ones, but could there be a connection

> between this and people's less than positive experiences of labour?

I don't think so - mine was a star during labour. I must admit there has to

be something pretty major up with you before he takes notice e.g DW in

labour or DS being sick, anything less and it would take a bomb up his

bottom to stir him into action.

Anyway he did the major back rubbing thing for me, passed me the gas and air

thingy and helped me refuse the epidural. Just a shame neither of us thought

to ask for another midwife as the one we got said she would NOT let me give

birth standing up and insisted on monitoring as I had been induced!!!!

There was no breathing and no positioning, but there you go.

Thanks for the thought anyway

July 20, 2001

<> I don't sleep well without a bear - I need something to

cuddle and DH

>won't

>> let me cuddle him!>>

wrote

<>>

My dh doesn't like me cuddeling him at night, but he is a very tactile person

during the day some people just need their own space when sleeping..

I may be wrong but I kind of thought that Anne liese (and who also

responded) only meant that their dh's did not like cuddling during the night..

but it is a interesting theory.. a little in the same lines as mine about people

who are naturally solitary people finding it difficult to have lots of people

around in labour whilst naturally sociable people find it comforting..

Lonnie Phoebe & Eloisa's mama

& expecting a Christmas delivery...

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what you

start.

So far today, I have finished 2 bags of chips and a Chocolate cake.

I feel better already.

July 20, 2001

> I feel a bit tentative about saying this, less it be construed as a

> criticism of people's loved ones, but could there be a connection

> between this and people's less than positive experiences of labour?

> If your partner don't feel comfortable with non-sexual touch, then I

> wonder if they will be forthcoming with the right kind of touch in

> labour - and maybe we know not even to ask :-(

IMHO, I don't think so. My DH isn't very good at non-sexual touch and

doesn't generally cuddle in bed, but was fairly good about rubbing my

back and shoulders in labour. I would have liked more of that sort of

assistance, just as I would like more cuddling, but it didn't have

much effect - though my labour was fairly 'easy'.

Phyllis

July 20, 2001

> I feel a bit tentative about saying this, less it be construed as a

> criticism of people's loved ones, but could there be a connection

> between this and people's less than positive experiences of labour?

> If your partner don't feel comfortable with non-sexual touch, then I

> wonder if they will be forthcoming with the right kind of touch in

> labour - and maybe we know not even to ask :-( I was lucky to develop

> a reasonably demanding streak and DH was very good and made all the

> difference, but I did have to tell him what to do (and I kept him

> busy rather than just looking on) Of course, if it so happens you

> find you can't bear to be touched in labour that's a different kettle

> of fish!

> --

>

> jennifer@...

> Vaudin

hmmm - don't think so - dh and I are fairly cuddly (he's also a trained

aromatherapist and masseur!) but I've not really needed the physical

contact in labour.....don't know why really.......

Hannah, 27

Mum to Bethany 7, Lawrence 5 1/2, Verity 3, Alfie 5 months

Visit me on the web at :-

http://hannahshome.20m.com

July 21, 2001

No, this isn't a general thing, just a sleeping thing - you know, like that

episode of " Friends " ? (I hope someone else remembers this) - the typical

male " get off, you're making me hot, I'm trying to sleep " thing. Happy to

be cuddled when not in bed!

Anneliese and Toddler Tim who spent half the night kicking us both in the

shoulder...

Hugging (was Re: hair pulling)

>

> >From: " Anneliese Handley "

> >Anneliese_Handley@...>

> >

> >> I don't sleep well without a bear - I need something to cuddle and DH

> >won't

> >> let me cuddle him!

> >

> >Do we have the same DH? Mine very rarely does either