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Re: Living in sin

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fab131 wrote:

> discovered that my parents did not get

> married until I was five and a half years old (DB was four and DSis

> was three!).

I discovered recently that friends of my parents got married last year -

without telling their children or any friends apart from Mum and Dad

(witnesses at the wedding) they had been living together for 30 years and had

always called themselves 'Mr and Mrs. X' and thought that the time had come

to make it official!

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>My parents virtually forced DH and I to get married when we bought our

>first house as there was no way we were going to live in sin. We went

>along with it but DH was extremely dischuffed some three years later

>when I,

>having started my family tree, discovered that my parents did not get

>married until I was five and a half years old (DB was four and DSis

>was three!). Dad was already married and could not get a divorce for

>quite some time! I've never told my mum I found out though as when I

>first discovered the fact Dad was terminally ill and thereafter the

>time never seemed quite right.

>

>Francesca

On my mother's side of the family there were two children born out of

wedlock and it was all quite open. My great grandmother had her first

child with someone else and they were not allowed to marry at the

time, and she married someone else, and a great aunt and uncle were

not allowed to marry until the child was 5 and they had enough money

to support themselves. That's partly why it was so funny that my

grandparents were so secretive (mind you, as a Methodist minister...)

- my aunt was pretty upset to find out she'd been conceived out of

wedlock. My brother and I were actually rather impressed - after all,

we have never had the feeling that they only married because she was

pregnant and it seemed a happy marriage. If the piece of paper is

there but the love and respect are not then it don't mean a thing.

I was pretty amazed to find myself agreeing to risk conception

outside marriage or even living together and neither planned, but it

seems that this was the only way we/he could do it, and it seems to

have worked so far. It was as if everything fell into place for DH

once I was pregnant. 4th July, pregnancy test, two days later he

decides he will sell his house, another three days and he shows up

with a ring...

--

jennifer@...

Vaudin

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Whilst writing my earlier post I have just realised that I have been

with DH longer than I have been without him IYSWIM.

We met when I was 15 and started going out together when I was 16. So

I had 16 years without him and now I'm 34 I've had 18 years with him

(8 before we got married and we'll be married 10 years this

September).

Useless thought of the day :)

Todman

Treasurer, Stansted Branch (R5)

Mum to , 3½

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Even at this late stage we have still lived together for longer than we

have been married ( oh no that's a fib 2 years going out, 9 years living

together, nearly married for 9 years), what I can't stand is the

hypocrisy - we all had to celebrate PIL's golden wedding anniversary

this year - in fact it's not until next year but since their oldest

daughter is 50 a month later we all have to have this silly charade.

Curran

Mum to Tim (7), (5), (3) and Philip 26/10/00

Co-Chair, MVA, Valley cushion agent, homebirth support and booking clerk

Selby Rural NCT

Region 7 Secretary

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