Guest guest Posted August 25, 2001 Report Share Posted August 25, 2001 All horribly true! Lesley > Things to Remember as A Dog > ---------------------------- > > 1. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff. > > 2. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the > coffee table. > > 3. I will not roll my toys behind the fridge, behind the sofa or under the > bed. > > 4. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house. > > 5. I will not eat the cats' food, before they eat it or after they throw it > up. > > 6. I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in > the house when I am about to get sick. > > 7. I will not throw up in the car. > > 8. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc just because I like > the way they smell. > > 9. " Kitty box crunchies, " although they are tasty, are not food. > > 10. I will not eat any more Kleenex or napkins and then re-deposit them in > the backyard after processing. > > 11. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar. > > 12. I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them. > > 13. I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my > people will think I am hemorrhaging. > > 14. When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when > it's raining outside. > > 15. We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV. > > 16. I will not steal my mom's underwear and dance all over the backyard with > it. > > 17. The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps. > > 18. My head does not belong in the refrigerator. > > 19. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for mom's driver's > license and car registration. > > 20. I will not play tug-of-war with dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 26, 2001 Report Share Posted August 26, 2001 > > > 16. I will not steal my mom's underwear and dance all over the backyard > > with it. > Or offer it to the meter reader (Blush) Who needs a dog for this? I have a toddler! (blush) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 26, 2001 Report Share Posted August 26, 2001 > > > 16. I will not steal my mom's underwear and dance all over the backyard > > with it. > Or offer it to the meter reader (Blush) Who needs a dog for this? I have a toddler! (blush) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 26, 2001 Report Share Posted August 26, 2001 Tee Hee - can I add : > > 8. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc just because I like > > the way they smell. Or swallow fish whole, and chew crabs leaving the legs dangling out the sides of my mouth > > 16. I will not steal my mom's underwear and dance all over the backyard > with it. Or offer it to the meter reader (Blush) Caroline Jersey Germain Jersey British Channel Islands Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 26, 2001 Report Share Posted August 26, 2001 Tee Hee - can I add : > > 8. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc just because I like > > the way they smell. Or swallow fish whole, and chew crabs leaving the legs dangling out the sides of my mouth > > 16. I will not steal my mom's underwear and dance all over the backyard > with it. Or offer it to the meter reader (Blush) Caroline Jersey Germain Jersey British Channel Islands Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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