Re: update on my Mom /Diane

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 8/4/2005 12:30:06 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

tsalagi@... writes:

>>>>Thank you, Stacey. I'm just so scared and don't know what to

expect. I don't know how my Mom will die--will she just fall asleep

or struggle?? What do you do next? call 911? I just can't sleep at

night trying to think what I'm going to do?? This is so stressfull

and I don't want to give up but I can't force my Mom to go for more

treatments when she doesn't want to. I'm not even over the loss of

my Dad and now I'm going to lose my Mom--why is life so hard and

unfair?

Thanks for all the support.

Diane

Oh, Diane...this is just a crying shame!!! You need to contact Hospice

right away. They will answer so many questions for you...and help in so many

ways.

Having just lost my Mom...struggling to be with her through the dying

process, if you have any questions and would rather email me personally, please

do...

_grandmommyandme@..._ (mailto:grandmommyandme@...)

If I can help, I certainly will....just be with Mom as often as you can and

tell her many times a day how much you love her. Attempt to make some

memories for yourself in the next however long you have with Mom....take photos

of

her.... record her voice if this is something you'd like to have...plan for

the " storm " !!! LMK if I can answer any questions...

Donelle

Caregiver to Glenn

[Guest guest]

I hope you you were able to call hospice today. At first for me calling them

was like giving up but then after talking to them and realizing that they were

doing what was best for my mother and that i needed help they were great. I

still cry whenever i see the perosn that came over the night my mom passed. we

had just called her about 2 and she stayed till about 30 minutes befroe my mom

passed, she was on her way home when i called her back, seh turned rught back

around and helped me through the process as best she could. I love that woman,

she helped to make my mothers final days as comfortable as possible.

stacey

Grandmommyandme@... wrote:

In a message dated 8/4/2005 12:30:06 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

tsalagi@... writes:

>>>>Thank you, Stacey. I'm just so scared and don't know what to

expect. I don't know how my Mom will die--will she just fall asleep

or struggle?? What do you do next? call 911? I just can't sleep at

night trying to think what I'm going to do?? This is so stressfull

and I don't want to give up but I can't force my Mom to go for more

treatments when she doesn't want to. I'm not even over the loss of

my Dad and now I'm going to lose my Mom--why is life so hard and

unfair?

Thanks for all the support.

Diane

Oh, Diane...this is just a crying shame!!! You need to contact Hospice

right away. They will answer so many questions for you...and help in so many

ways.

Having just lost my Mom...struggling to be with her through the dying

process, if you have any questions and would rather email me personally, please

do...

_grandmommyandme@..._ (mailto:grandmommyandme@...)

If I can help, I certainly will....just be with Mom as often as you can and

tell her many times a day how much you love her. Attempt to make some

memories for yourself in the next however long you have with Mom....take photos

of

her.... record her voice if this is something you'd like to have...plan for

the " storm " !!! LMK if I can answer any questions...

Donelle

Caregiver to Glenn

[Guest guest]

Dear Stacey,

Have you called hospice to help you?

Some people struggle as did my children's dad, he was just so afraid. Others,

like my friend Pat who died of breast cancer in my arms while her family ate in

the next room, go peacefully; she even managed to say " you are a good friend "

before she left. It had never happened to me before.

If hospice comes in, they will let you know as the time nears. You should have

people with you. There will be things for you to do, people to call.

Sending blessings,

Karima

update on my Mom /Diane

>>>>Thank you, Stacey. I'm just so scared and don't know what to

expect. I don't know how my Mom will die--will she just fall asleep

or struggle?? What do you do next? call 911? I just can't sleep at

night trying to think what I'm going to do?? This is so stressfull

and I don't want to give up but I can't force my Mom to go for more

treatments when she doesn't want to. I'm not even over the loss of

my Dad and now I'm going to lose my Mom--why is life so hard and

unfair?

Thanks for all the support.

Diane

>>>>>>>>.

Dear Diane,

I cannot answer your question as to why life is so hard and unfair. I've

struggled with this question also and have no answer except to always remember

this:

'We are not human beings here on this earth to have a spiritual

experience......we are SPIRIT beings here on this earth to have a human

experience.'

This world is not our home. It was never meant to be our home, and never will

be. We are just visiting for a short time.

As strange as it may sound, you can make this time with your mother one of the

most precious times in your relationship.

My father was on hospice care for close to two years. he knew he would not get

better and that he was dying.

His favorite saying was, " I'm ready to hang it up, but I can't reach the

hook. "

He was kept very well medicated and comfortable. Sometimes he would hold off

on the meds if he wanted to, sometimes not....it was entirely his decision.

We had some of the most precious talks, and " not talks " . " Not talks " are just

being there by their side, not saying a word....just feeling each others

company.

Daddy passed over in his sleep one Saturday morning around 7:15. Mom had left

the room to make coffee at 7:10 and he was okay and sleeping. when she returned

to the room about five minutes later, he was gone....peacefully. I'll never

forget how he looked when I arrived there about 10 minutes later, so peaceful.

Our first call was to Hospice and they take care of making the rest of the

necessary calls.

Before the Hospice nurse arrived, I was able to spend time with him. Touching

him, telling him how much we loved him....and I DO believe he heard. I clipped a

little snippet of a lock of his hair which I wear to this day in a locket around

my neck.

My Daddy taught me alot of lessons but this one, how to die, was perhaps one

of the most important because it also taught me 'how to live'.

You must look at this time of the end of your mothers' life as a journey. One

that you are being privileged to be a part of.

I promise you, you will receive a blessing from it. You may not recognize it

at the time, but you will later.

My prayers are with you, and your mother.

nancy j

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[Guest guest]

I have already been there and done that. It was Diane that had the question.

You are indeed a good friend to be with your friend at the end. Both my mother

and mother in law had friends with them at the end

Barbara Gari karima1@...> wrote:Dear Stacey,

Have you called hospice to help you?

Some people struggle as did my children's dad, he was just so afraid. Others,

like my friend Pat who died of breast cancer in my arms while her family ate in

the next room, go peacefully; she even managed to say " you are a good friend "

before she left. It had never happened to me before.

If hospice comes in, they will let you know as the time nears. You should have

people with you. There will be things for you to do, people to call.

Sending blessings,

Karima

update on my Mom /Diane

>>>>Thank you, Stacey. I'm just so scared and don't know what to

expect. I don't know how my Mom will die--will she just fall asleep

or struggle?? What do you do next? call 911? I just can't sleep at

night trying to think what I'm going to do?? This is so stressfull

and I don't want to give up but I can't force my Mom to go for more

treatments when she doesn't want to. I'm not even over the loss of

my Dad and now I'm going to lose my Mom--why is life so hard and

unfair?

Thanks for all the support.

Diane

>>>>>>>>.

Dear Diane,

I cannot answer your question as to why life is so hard and unfair. I've

struggled with this question also and have no answer except to always remember

this:

'We are not human beings here on this earth to have a spiritual

experience......we are SPIRIT beings here on this earth to have a human

experience.'

This world is not our home. It was never meant to be our home, and never will

be. We are just visiting for a short time.

As strange as it may sound, you can make this time with your mother one of the

most precious times in your relationship.

My father was on hospice care for close to two years. he knew he would not get

better and that he was dying.

His favorite saying was, " I'm ready to hang it up, but I can't reach the

hook. "

He was kept very well medicated and comfortable. Sometimes he would hold off

on the meds if he wanted to, sometimes not....it was entirely his decision.

We had some of the most precious talks, and " not talks " . " Not talks " are just

being there by their side, not saying a word....just feeling each others

company.

Daddy passed over in his sleep one Saturday morning around 7:15. Mom had left

the room to make coffee at 7:10 and he was okay and sleeping. when she returned

to the room about five minutes later, he was gone....peacefully. I'll never

forget how he looked when I arrived there about 10 minutes later, so peaceful.

Our first call was to Hospice and they take care of making the rest of the

necessary calls.

Before the Hospice nurse arrived, I was able to spend time with him. Touching

him, telling him how much we loved him....and I DO believe he heard. I clipped a

little snippet of a lock of his hair which I wear to this day in a locket around

my neck.

My Daddy taught me alot of lessons but this one, how to die, was perhaps one

of the most important because it also taught me 'how to live'.

You must look at this time of the end of your mothers' life as a journey. One

that you are being privileged to be a part of.

I promise you, you will receive a blessing from it. You may not recognize it

at the time, but you will later.

My prayers are with you, and your mother.

nancy j

----------

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Checked by AVG Anti-Virus.

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