Recurrent disease

[Guest guest]

Well, group, I just got back from the clinic and got the news about

my biopsy, which took forever to get scheduled and then rescheduled

twice, then waited three weeks for the results.

It seems what I was hoping would be scar tissue is actually recurrent

disease. They send in a very nice nurse who wants to know if I want

to be on a phase I trial. I had six rounds of Saltz before, this

time it will be Xeloda and the other two, plus oxaliplatin. It's

really the same drugs, just different way of administering them.

Needless to say I'm devastated. It's been over a year since I

finished adjuvant chemo and now I'm facing it again, this time with

the neuropathy. They're going to schedule me for another biopsy and

port placement and then I guess I'll start it all over again. This

is the first time I really wish I'd had somebody else there to hear

the things I didn't hear or ask what I didn't know to ask. I think

I'm more numb than I was when I had my first oncology appointment

after surgery.

I cried all the way home and since I was there alone, I nearly missed

my turn to get home, which is miles from where I thought I was when I

happened to notice the street sign.

I haven't posted much here, but I read the posts every day and you've

all been such an inspiration for me. I feel like I know so many of

you personally.

Kaye, I'm counting on you to keep proving we can beat this thing.

You're my hero, after all. And Cliff, just keep reminding us

that miracles happen. I'm really feeling low right now.

Has anybody heard how Joe's progressing? I haven't heard anything

from him in a while, don't know if I missed something or he just

hasn't posted.

When I know more or remember more, I'll post again.

in Dallas