Oh Vey

[Guest guest]

..Sorry again for the long silence and thanks for all the bd wishes. The night before my birthday I totally shut my computer down because of really bad tstorms. Then as usual, it took me at least a week to get it going again. I didn't do anything on my bd; had invited me out to dinner at a lovely restaurant but I knew he also had an invitation to go fishing and he's hardly been out at all. So I feigned a headache so he'd go.

I did get a fantastic lounger for the deck with the nice comfy material rather than cheap stripy things. I have actually fallen asleep on it. As well he also got me my Kindle which I love, love, love. Anyone who has problems with their eyesight, you really should give it a try. You can control the size of the print and reading is so much easier than on white paper. If that makes sense at all.

Anyway I think I'd told you we hadn't been getting along too well lately; in fact I don't think got along with anybody very well. I can't stand going over there simply because of Jr. I'm sick of him lying down the basement all the time, contributing nothing but joining the daily methadone line. has to hire a kid to help with the yardwork, repairs,etc while Jr does nothing. Except make a mess and treat his father as if he's a stupid old man.

We did go out for a lovely ride in the country on that Sunday, I splurged at the fresh fruit market and he bought me an ice cream birthday cake. I ended up sleeping there that night, Jr said nothing, and the next day we went to get another piece of my yummy cake. The box was all smashed, a melted glob all over the table downstairs, and 3/4 of the cake gone. "What cake, I didn't eat any cake". The basement is an absolute pigsty thanks to him. Then and I were watching something on tv, probably trying to calm him down, when Jr barges in and tells me he's going to pick up some girl who's going to help him clean up and then sleep over. Say what????? told him no way, the 37 yr old burst into tears, started tossing stuff all around, etc. That was it for me; if I stayed I would have lit into him which I have no right to other than I'm still his damn surety and I question his sobriety.

His trial over the drug trafficking keeps getting postponed and it's been over 2 yrs! Anyway he's not gone to therapy nor does he seem to have any ambition or goal in life. So it really wasn't a surprise when came over next morning, I think it was Monday, and "guess where ny is?" Of course I guessed 'jail' and so far he's not gotten out.

looks a mess, he's wound so tight I'm afraid he's going to have a heart attack. He went to try and visit him this evening but someone had a medical emergency and they cancelled visiting hours. We still don't know exactly what he's charged with; since he's an adult (sure doesn't act like one), they won't tell . But he's gone everyday waiting in case he has a bail hearing.

My nerves are shot worrying about mainly that I hope it's causing the ms to act up. Both sides are spasming so badly at night I'm sleep deprived. Plus I think it's so wrong that his mother isn't told. I don't care that she has a strained relationship with Jr; she loves him and he is her son. As far as is concerned, I know he loves his sons with all his being but he's either been stupid or just didn't want to see things about them. And if you try to say anything, he immediately becomes defensive. I'll shut up now and try to read a few emails. My mouse is going ... everytime I use it I have to unplug and replug it. Used to always have an extra one and keyboard in case

Hope everyone is well ... hugs, Cait